Choosing a name for your unborn child is one of the most exciting things to check off of your to-do list when you’re expecting. You scour the Internet for the most popular baby name or search the family tree for a unique name owned by a relative. Either way, naming a person is an incredibly important decision and one in which everyone wants dibs.
Immediately after finding out the sex of our child the very next question from family, friends and even strangers is almost always, “Have you chosen a name?” To which I reply, “Yes, but we’re not telling people until she’s born.” Interestingly enough, most parents applaud us as they revealed their child’s name and endured heavy criticism or unsolicited name alternatives.
I even had a friend who changed the name of her unborn daughter after she received severe judgment from relatives.
Our main reason for not sharing our unborn daughter’s name isn’t fear of starting over, we don’t want to hear comments, concerns, or see that disappointing half-smile of approval.
Also, it took us 10 weeks to come up with our child’s name (a record since it only took seven weeks to make a decision on our first daughter’s name) so additional input would have made things unnecessarily hectic.
Be honest, how many times have you heard a child’s name and thought, “Who named you that and why?” We’ve all done it, and while it’s okay to keep those thoughts inside of our heads, we really don’t have the right to share our opinion on the matter since it’s not our kid.
There are additional benefits of staying mum about your unborn child’s name other than avoiding shade, like:
After sharing main details of my pregnancy (the gender, the due date, etc.), I figured the name would be an element that my husband and I could keep to ourselves. It’s fun keeping people guessing, and the anticipation of the name is heightened.
The possible name amendment
What if you change your mind? Even though we’ve determined the first and middle name, there’s still a small chance we could go back to our short list and rethink our decision. The kid isn’t here yet so there’s time and of course we could fall in love with a name that we randomly come across.
It’s your right
It’s your kid so if you don’t want to divulge the name of your unborn child (or any other information for that matter), don’t! Never feel pressured to give up any information or feel like you have to explain your decision. It’s that simple.
After all, it’s a lot easier for a critic to voice their opinion, at least to you, when the child isn’t yet born. Who has the heart to tell the parents that their newborn’s name reminds them of a bully who tormented them during childhood or all of the stupid nicknames that come with the chosen name.
I believe that keeping this major choice a secret until absolutely necessary is a must and one that will ensure not to impose any additional stress on your pregnancy.