He Said, She Said: Does Size Really Matter?

June 2, 2015  |  

I’m sure many of us have found ourselves standing in Duane Reade, Walgreens, Rite Aid or CVS for several minutes while trying to figure out the “right” brand of condom to buy. Companies like Trojan have made millions as they have marketed their Magnum brand as the go-to condom for the well-endowed male. And while some men honestly need the extra space, it is assumed that other guys go for the larger gold wrapper because they want to seem like “the man.” Why? Because there is a popular opinion that the larger a male is down there, the better sex will be. However, some have disputed this assumption by saying it’s not the size of the equipment, but how you use it.

As I assembled a think tank of both men and women, I was very amused by the feedback that I received, and the explanations given for why both men and women place so much emphasis on penis size. So with that being said, does size really matter?

He Said.

“No man ever feels his penis is small. We tend to feel like the man until she tells us it’s small.” That was an opinion expressed during an interview with one of the men about the assumed penis size obsession. I was surprised to learn that most men don’t put as much thought into their penis as women do. When I asked why does size matter to men, many responded with “Do you mean women?” I was amused to learn that most of the guys I talked to think that the simple fact that they have a penis is enough for them to feel good about themselves. And unless you’re one of those guys who just likes to sit around and talk about his penis all the time, some of the guys I spoke to claimed that most men aren’t that insecure. A few who admitted to being insecure agreed that they didn’t second-guess themselves until a woman criticized their penis size and made them feel small.

It got a little rowdy when some got passionate about how ruthless some women can be about penis size. Regardless of girth, if a guy feels he can make you orgasm, and he has done so, his penis size shouldn’t matter. Some had the idea that sex is sex. If a guy has a big heart and he expresses his love even bigger, a woman should be more accepting and less shallow. Coming into the conversation with my own judgments, I didn’t expect the type of feedback I received. I was waiting for the men to talk about how big their penises were and go on their ego trips. However, most were quiet and very honest about the fact that size doesn’t matter to them.

She Said.

Most of the women I spoke to said they believe size does matter. In fact, the men they entertain should be well within average size. When asked what the average size in inches they preferred is, some of the women I spoke to did agree on nine to 10 inches, which the men found to be completely insane. Only a few women felt their partner’s penis size doesn’t matter, and they said it isn’t a factor as long as the sex is still pleasurable. “What’s the point in having a huge penis if you don’t know what to do with it?” one woman said. Another woman believed that sex itself is a constant work in progress when you first meet someone. Therefore, learning how to explore each other’s bodies is more important. But when asked flat out, none of the women said they would settle for a man with a small penis.

Science Says.

The average male penis size is five to six inches when erect. For women, the length of the vagina is approximately five inches deep, so it sounds like a perfect fit, right? However, according to preliminary research conducted by the Sexual Psycho-physiology and Affective Neuroscience Laboratory, women prefer slightly larger than average penises for both casual sex and long-term relationships. As a result of this, their partners are prone to “small penis syndrome,” which is a condition where men, despite having average penis sizes, may feel inferior. Sexologist Ian Kerner observed that the average woman who believes that size matters has also never experienced an orgasm, which could be the reason for her views on size. And according to sex therapist Debby Herbenick, it isn’t unusual for most women to not have experienced an orgasm due to a lack of direct clitoral stimulation. Herbenick suggests trying different positions to increase that stimulation.

The Consensus.

Seven out of eight women (84%) claim they are satisfied with their partner sexually regardless of size. The remaining 16% hold to their views on size being imperative. At the end of the day, the men argued that it’s not about the size, but how well you can handle your equipment. But what about you? Would you say that size matters?

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