Lift Some Weights And Pick Up A Date: Flirting At The Gym 101

May 16, 2013  |  
1 of 15

The gym isn’t like a singles bar: completely different rules apply to what you wear, how you speak, how you move, and in general what the etiquette is. But that doesn’t mean it’s not a great place to meet guys. Hey, the endorphins are already pumping, might as well take advantage!

Flirt slowly

First off, if you have your eye on someone at the gym, odds are they are someone you’ll be seeing often. So before you lay it on them thick, be sure they’re someone you actually want to pursue. Have a few friendly, light chats, spread out over at least a week before you blatantly show interest. Within that time, you should be able to tell if you actually want to see where things can go.

Be relaxed about machinery

Everybody can get uptight about waiting too long for a machine, or being cut in line for weights. But the last thing you want is a potential love interest seeing you lose it over something small, or being rude to other gym goers. If you want the gym to be a pick up place, you’re going to have to learn to relax there.

Leave the ladies areas

Like it or not, women tend to stick to cardio machines and classes, while men spend more time in the weights area. How are you supposed to meet men if you’re segregated? Studies have actually found that most women would benefit from doing more weights but only around 20% of them do. Do your dating life and your muscles a favor and hang in the weight section. Not only will competition be low because not many women go there, but men will be impressed you even touch weights!

Ask for tips!

Men love to feel manly and nothing makes them feel more masculine than being at the gym and being asked for advice. If you instill a feeling of being a protector they’ll come back for more, so ask a fine man how to use equipment or weights and kill two birds with one stone.

 Skip the neons

Neon is a popular hue for women’s workout clothes, but it’s also unfortunately a turn off for men. Men are attracted to more natural, earthy like colors. Stick to pastels, or the good old white/black/grey combos.

Look cute but not too cute

If you’re wearing your old worn out camp t-shirt and basketball shorts, men will think you want to be left alone, so do invest in flattering workout pants and cute tanks. However, men will think you’re frivolous if you’re in full on makeup and a push up bra at the gym. Strike a balance.


Skip the iPod

Sorry! We know it pumps up your workouts but no man wants to approach a woman who he has to wave down just so she’ll know he’s standing there. Plus, watching a show on the provided TV’s offers a conversation starter.

Love your workout!

If you’re doing exercises you hate, you’ll look pained and irritated. And no man wants to approach that! Make sure you’re enjoying your workouts because everyone is attracted to happiness and confidence.

Talk to everyone

Do this because A) If you only talk to men, they’ll think you just use the gym as a singles scene and B) Men love social, friendly women. Guys will love that you partake in making the gym a social, good time for everyone by chit chatting with everyone from the 80-year-old man to the college students.

Play pick up games

If your gym has a basketball court, get in on pick up games with a few guys. If there’s a pool, an impromptu water polo game. This is a totally no-commitment way to start socializing with men.

Keep it friendly at the gym

If you do go on a date with a guy from your gym—or even a few successful dates—don’t flaunt the love connection at your gym. Be friendly and cordial, but don’t be touchy. You don’t know where this is going, and if other guys think you’re linked up with a guy at the gym, they likely won’t try to get at you.


Don’t use the treadmill next to his

It may seem like a great way to strike up a conversation, but when was the last time you enjoyed jogging and talking? At best you’ll be able to grunt out sentences if you position yourself next to a cutie, but the conversation will be awkward and feel stunted. Wait to talk by the drinking fountain or in line for machines.

Don’t date your trainer

Of course your trainer is fine! He’s a trainer! But a good trainer is hard to find and you don’t want to take away from the actual workout by flirting. Oh and if that romantic relationship doesn’t work out, you can bet he will definitely still be at your gym every day. A regular guy might have done you the courtesy of finding another gym, or at least making sure you didn’t go at the same time.



It’s tough because you’re sweating and exhausted and working out naturally lends itself to those unflattering facial expressions, but smile. One of the top things men reference as a reason they know they can approach a woman is because she is smiling.

Trending on MadameNoire

Comment Disclaimer: Comments that contain profane or derogatory language, video links or exceed 200 words will require approval by a moderator before appearing in the comment section. XOXO-MN