If chivalry were a person, he’d be suffering from a terminal illness and gasping for his last breath. Back in medieval times, men gallantly displayed their courage, glory and honor before their love for all to see, chest puffed with pride.They spoke in sonnets to profess their love and didn’t hesitate to battle for their mate’s freedom. Okay, so my Game of Throne-esque analogy may be a bit over the top, but you get my drift. Most men today don’t appreciate doing the little things that add up big time when treating a woman like a lady (sometimes, ladies are guilty too). From opening and closing the car door to pulling out a chair for your lady, chivalry has withered away like Dr. Heiddegar’s rose. We’re talking respect and romance here people. And here are the reasons why it has dissolved in today’s society . . .
Texting Over Hand holding
Texting takes away from showing real emotion and affection. Emoticons and LOL smiley faces have replaced hand holding, snuggling and all-out, real one-on-one conversation.
Not So Social Media
Twitter, Facebook, Ruzzle, and Words with Friends have consumed our lives. We are attached to our cell phones, tablets and laptops. We don’t make the time to allow real relationships to evolve naturally, for the act of chivalry to occur. So, we end up getting Tweets and FB messages to show affection instead of flowers.
There’s no need to pull a chair out for your lady at a fancy-smancy restaurant when all you have to do is log-on to Match.com. Forget fast food, you can get a fast date with minimal effort and no strings attached.
Loss Of Interpersonal Skills
With the lack of verbal communication among people these days it’s no wonder it’s become even more difficult for men to express romantic interest or do nice things for women.
All The Single Ladies
All the single ladies and the few single men make for an uneven ratio. If it were a feast, the men would be the devourers. Women? The buffet. Instead, for most ladies it’s a famine and men can get by with little to no effort.
Shows like “The Bachelor” portray women as the hunter, a lioness eager to pounce on her prey. Really there is no need for the man to be chivalrous. The roles have reversed. He has the upper hand at picking any woman he likes, like picking out a new flavor at your local ice cream parlor.
Easy Breezy Girls
Speaking of ice cream, if your milkshake brings all the boys to the yard, treating you like a lady is the last thing on their mind. The hit it and quit it, bash and dash method applies here. Enough said.
Some women are so self-sufficient, they won’t even allow a man to do simple things for them. Bey got all the ladies shouting from mountaintops and throwing hands up for their independence. Let the man open your car door! He knows you’re hand is fully capable of pulling the handle. He’s doing it out of respect. He’s not trying to merge bank accounts here!
He Needs Home Training
And then there are some men who simply didn’t get the chivalry lesson growing up. Perhaps dad wasn’t around to show them (and let’s face it-there are tons of homes missing dads) through the way he treats mom.
Both parties are guilty here. If the ladies don’t enforce it, as in verbally say what they like, it ain’t happening. Subsequently, if guys would rather crack open a beer than break a sweat over trying to wine and dine you, good luck with that. It takes effort from both the lady and the gentleman.
If a man’s focus is on what bills need to be paid and robbing Peter to pay Paul, then being chivalrous may take the backseat. In that case, though, he probably doesn’t have the time — or money — to be dating you anyway.
It’s A ‘New’ Day
Some men don’t believe in chivalry – period. In this new day and age, they feel that treating women as equals extends to the courteous side of things as well. So no, he won’t help you into your coat because you are not handicapped. He won’t walk on the side closest to the street because why should he get hit by a speeding car instead of you?
Sometimes men do make attempts to be chivalrous, but women don’t pick up on the signs. Women may shake off a compliment or refuse to accept a gift. This can leave men frustrated, and they will eventually stop trying altogether. We have to do our part to show appreciation as well.