'Listen to Black Women' S6 Ep 3 Part 4: Saying 'I Love You'
Watch ‘Listen to Black Women’ S6, Ep. 3 Part 4: LeToya Luckett & Tish Taylor-Searcy Talk Marriage Advice, Matchmaking & Saying ‘I Love You’ First
On the latest episode of Listen to Black Women, Lore’l and Jessie Woo continue exploring the topic of love and marriage. In the fourth and final segment of this series, they sit down with LeToya Luckett and Tish Taylor-Searcy to talk about playing matchmaker, marriage advice, and saying “I love you” first.
Are women setting the bar too high?
Jessie wonders if LeToya and Tish have ever tried setting up their single girlfriends. So far, they haven’t had luck there. Which raises the question: are women too picky? Not exactly. “You can be picky,” Tish says. “But at least entertain it, give it a try.”
They talk about appearances, questioning whether physical traits like height and weight should count as dealbreakers.
“Is he treating you right? Can y’all talk? Are you friends?” LeToya says.
“Is he kind?” Jessie adds. “It’s so hard to find a kind man. It’s ridiculous!”
How much should you open up about your marriage?
The married women at the table, LeToya and Tish, aren’t opposed to hearing relationship advice from friends, single or not.
“I’m grateful that I have single friends that still push me towards my husband,” LeToya says. “I’m grateful that I have a beautiful community of women and men who are like, ‘No, you fight for your marriage.’”
Jessie inquires, “How do you protect the peace within your marriage?”
For Tish, it’s about keeping her marriage close to home. “I keep a lot of what goes on with me and my husband pretty private,” says the serial entrepreneur. “We don’t have too many issues, but you know how your friends be more mad than you?”
“It is okay to protect your marriage by having a dialogue, stay between y’all for a minute, then seeking counsel,” LeToya adds. The singer and actress is able to confide in her family because it’s not about taking sides. “My mother-in-love, she’s going to fight for right. So I trust that I can have a conversation with her, and his sister as well.”
It’s all about who you trust and how much you’re willing to share about married life. “You have to use your discernment before you start having these conversations,” LeToya says.
“I’m so glad you said that,” adds Tish. “There were times before we were married, I may have said ABC. But during our marriage, we’re going to talk this out.”
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How can women communicate what they want in a relationship?
Lore’l poses the question, “Have you ever said ‘I love you’ first?”
Tish did, and even when “he didn’t say it back right away,” she had no doubt in her mind that the feeling was mutual. “I knew he did from the way he treated me. I just felt it.”
She points out, “A lot of men say stuff, but they do different.”
Jessie sees the positive in saying “I love you” first. “I mean, we all would love for the men to say it first, right? But sometimes when you say it, you make them realize, ‘This is a safe place for me to be in love and for me to give love.’”
The host continues, encouraging women to feel empowered and stand firm on what they want in a relationship. “I think, women too, we need to do a better job,” Jessie says. “I know we’re always ready to bash the guys, but I feel like we have to have clear boundaries, clear standards, and clear messaging. Don’t expect the man to read your mind. Don’t just go with the flow.”
LeToya adds, “Don’t be afraid to ask questions. (Women) feel like if they ask, they’re gonna lose it. If I’m leading with fear, obviously, you feel it too … It is okay to check the temperature and not have to fear asking: where is your heart right now?”
What advice would you share with Black women looking for love?
Finally, Tish and LeToya offer words of encouragement for women who are ready to find love. “No relationship is perfect,” Tish says. “If that is the relationship that you want, fight for it.”
“Don’t let nobody pressure you into nothing, sis,” LeToya says. “Use your discernment. Don’t lead with fear in any decision that you make. Know your value.”
“If you have been through heartbreak, if you have been through a divorce, it does not mean that you’re done. It does not mean that you can’t love again. It does not mean that you are not a wife,” LeToya says.
Join the conversation from start to finish. Watch Listen to Black Women above.
Tap In Thursdays For New Episodes Of Listen To Black Women
Season 6 of Listen to Black Women is officially here. The iOne Digital original podcast centers Black women as they explore life, love, culture, and community through candid, thought-provoking conversations—featuring guests who speak their truths and leave no topic off-limits. Catch new episodes every Thursday on MadameNoire.com.
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