Black Women Aren’t Mad At Black Men For 'Bunny-Hopping'

As Black women, oftentimes we are advised to be quiet when conversations turn to Black men and interracial relationships. This warning comes at the risk of us sounding bitter, divisive, and anti-love. Fine. Say what you will or may, but let us be clear, our thoughts and feelings that do not align with our brothers or the so-called “preferences” are not about anger, jealousy, or depriving Black men of the love they deserve. We are not weaponizing love or making Black men who love non-Black women villains. We are simply calling bullish on what is obvious.

More often than not, this conversation is about pattern recognition, because when Black women say, “we saw this coming,” we are not just being smug; we are being honest. Like Black men, we have watched this cycle repeat itself with enough consistency to know the warning signs. When power increases and accountability disappears, the fall is rarely sudden. It is staged. And we are willing to bet there were signs ignored.

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Case in point: our response to the foolishness with Shannon Sharpe and his little “Snow Bunny” eager to have a “big Black baby” inside of her. The reaction was not anger because he had chosen a white woman; it was disappointment. And the disappointment was not about race. Watching a man like Shannon, who built trust by being a Black man who told hard truths and was loud about discipline, responsibility, and consequences, fall from grace was cringey. Especially when you know he should have seen it coming from a mile away. A 20-year-old White girl, an OnlyFans “model.” You’re damn skippy she is going to run those pockets.

For those of you who aren’t familiar with all of the details, here a few sips of Gabriella and Shannon bitter tea. Shannon and Gabriella met at a gym in Los Angeles sometime in 2023. They had a consensual sexual relationship until January 2, 2025. This is around the time ALL HELL BROKE LOOSE! Shannon allegedly told Gabriella if she sent him $50k she could visit his home. Her response was, “I know you miss these big juicy cheeks… $25K for each cheek,” according to an article published by Yahoo. Now, according to Gabriella, Shannon threatened to kill her, he manipulated her, controlled her, and repeatedly threatened to “brutally choke her and violently slap her,” according to the legal papers.

Now Unk and his legal team fired back with receipts and I am not going to lie, the text messages were very explicit with Gabriella texting things like, “tie me up like this & f–k me(with a photo attached), I wanna be abused daddy, mmm that just got my p—y wet. tie me up and do bad things to me, I want like some hardcore bdsm action tho” and “feeling kinda freaky lately.” Gabriella was definitely all in. In one of the text messages Shannon accused Gabriella of having a “baby kink.” And according to the text message and public opinion it was SOMETHING!

The conversations about her desire to have a baby with him were a huge red flag, she allegedly texted, “only if you put that baby gravy in me, then u can do whatever u want to me” and “i literally ate so much food I look like I’m pregnant with ur big black baby.” Insert side eye.

When the relationship drama crept into his narrative, the issue was not a scandal. It was a contradiction. I think the question wasn’t rather or not the sexual assault happened but why? Why would you position yourself here with a girl who clearly had a motive at your big age. In Shannon’s lawyers opinion, the problems began when Sharpe was heard apparently having sex on Instagram Live in September 2024. Our question is what did he think would happen? How did he expect her to react? She thought her bag was in jeopardy, she had to say or do something to secure her bag. His questionable behavior made him vulnerable and subject to the easiest money grab ever. And yeah, I know TI said, “It aint tricking if you got it” but no one is trying to throw away 23 million dollars but I guess that is better than the 50 million she requested. The fact is, when your credibility is rooted in calling out others, people expect you to move with intention. People expect you to play chess, but this brother got beaten in a game of Connect Four. That is a disconnect none of us expected. Especially not from a 57 year old man.

Now, this is not new or specific to Unk. We also saw it with Tiger Woods and Elin Nordegren and while the details are sketchy, we learned more about the golf legend then we wanted to. Multiple affairs, drugs and alcohol abuse all led to a 100 million dollar divorce settlement, embarrassment and time in rehab. Another ouch that could have been avoided with better judgement. And honestly, this isn’t me blaming a woman for a man cheating. This is me blaming a Black man for not reading the room and thinking that he could play in that white girl’s face without her dragging him to hell. Oh God and speaking of being drug to hell! How can we exclude Kanye West and Kim Kardashian from this conversation?

Yes, the unraveling was louder and more detailed but still not surprising. From a Black woman’s vantage point, it was clear when the guardrails disappeared. But his proximity to white celebrity culture did not meet him with correction. Instead, it welcomed more chaos. As I said before, this was no surprise because we have watched the Kardashian women contribute to the downfall of several Black Men. Kanye’s genius went unedited. Tristan’s ego went unchecked. And Lamar’s accountability disappeared. They may not have said it but their obsession with Black men and having Black babies is apparent. However, they have mastered tricking Black men into thinking they are different and their fate won’t be similar to that of the brothers before them but the joke is on them.

These are not men who were ruined by love. These are men who fell from grace because they chose women who love status. They choose women that they considered trophies because they were privileged with whiteness. Women who wanted to be married without the roles and responsibilities of a wife. We saw these men surrounded by access to a culture that was never intended to encourage, energize, or uplift them. Black men with no one empowered to tell them “no.”

Since I mentioned Lamar Odom, can we talk about how his pain was turned into public consumption? Addiction, grief, and mental health struggles were packaged as entertainment. From where we stood, it felt exploitative. Listen, we know he isn’t blameless, he decided to confront his demons with drug induced logic. However the role of a wife is also to protect her husband even when she must protect him from himself. But instead of protecting Lamar, Khloe aired his pain for public consumption. Now, as his wife, a woman he still holds close to his heart, Khloe could not have thought healing would happen with cameras in his face. Or at least, she should not have.

This is where Black women are standing back, shaking our damn heads because we clocked early that he was in an environment that profited from his breakdown rather than providing him with protection to help build him back up. We didn’t need him, Kanye, Tristan or Travis Scott to blink twice, it is always obvious that not one of the Black men connected to the Kardashian clan are safe.

Normally we address the monetary loss many of these Black men experience when the relationships go left, we cannot dismiss the humiliation many of them experience. I’m talking about notable, once well-respected Black men reduced to memes, jokes, and conversations connected to their image that changed the way the world saw them. I’m talking about men like Scottie Pippen who like Tiger Woods image took a huge blow.

I don’t know about anyone else, but I knew nothing about this man’s personal life until the ish hit the fan between him and his ex-wife, Larsa Pippen. Not even his legendary career or teammate Michael Jordan could block Larsa’s slam dunk once his private life went viral. Black women understand deeply that privacy is power, and that once it is gone, dignity will have to knuckle up to survive, if it can. His silence about the situation did not read as strength; it conveyed shame for the exposure of loads of dirty laundry.

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From a Black woman’s perspective, the through line is clear. This is not about interracial dating; it’s about what happens when Black men confuse proximity to non-Blackness, specifically whiteness, with protection, alignment, and approval. Yes, we could easily mind the business that pays and protects us. Clearly, not any of the aforementioned brothers. However, somewhere along the way, community responsibility must come into play, which is definitely where it becomes a job for sisters.

We cannot sit quietly and allow indulgence to eliminate accountability. Since we are the ones expected to help you pick up the pieces when it “All Falls Down,” we are also going to be the ones to make you call those things a thing. We are done washing laundry that’s covered in dirt we warned you not to play in. Whoever pretends to be shocked when things fall apart, can. We are not. Black women are trained to read rooms, systems, and people early. We notice when a man stops listening. We notice when ego versus being grounded. We notice when healing struggles for image. And too often, we are expected to hold space for the fallout after warning signs were ignored. Honestly, we are expected to hold space and SHUT TF UP, simultaneously.

So, when we say, “we saw this coming,” it is not judgment—well, maybe it’s a little judgment. But it is also experience. It is love. Yes, it is a little anger and aggravation because Black men, you continue to fall for the okie doke. But it is love, it is loyalty, and it is protection in its most sincere form.

Black men loving non-Black women is not the problem for Black women because there are plenty of Black men for us. It’s some Black men’s unchecked power and abandonment of logic.

Listen, falling from grace is not tragic because it is public. It is tragic because when it comes to bunny-hopping Black men, it is so damn predictable.

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