He’s No Good For You: How To Stay Away

March 29, 2012  |  
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They say women are tricky, but men have their tricks too. Why else do women become hung up on men who are no good for us? Because those men know just how to keep us interested, in the face of the hard reality: they will never actually give us what we want. Check out these tips to help you forget about your bad boy.

Tell him to go away

You complain, “He keeps texting me.” You say, “I don’t understand him; he says he doesn’t want a relationship, but then he invites me over.” Oh poor you. He’s confusing you. What, oh what can you possibly do? Oh yeah. Tell him to stop contacting you. Sure, he’s reaching out, and that’s because he knows you want it. Lie, and tell him you don’t. Your heart will catch up with your head eventually.


Remember, you can forget anyone

It’s childish and something made of Disney fantasies to think that anyone is the one. There are thousands if not millions of people out there who could make you happy. If you just put him out of sight, by blocking his number, unfriending him on Facebook and cutting out any other form of communication, he will be out of mind soon. Within a few months, you’ll realize, “Wow. I have no feelings for that person anymore. I can’t believe I considered putting myself through the hell of being lead on by someone who I was able to forget within months…” Amazing what happens with just a little distance…


Don’t make excuses for him

He’s still hurt from his last breakup? He has intimacy issues because of his mom who abandoned him? He’s just so busy with work and that’s why he isn’t giving you half of what you deserve out of a relationship? SO WHAT? You’ve figured him out. Woopti-Do. Are you getting what you want because you’ve figured out why you’re not getting it?  Absolutely not. Stop making excuses for him. It doesn’t actually change anything.


Set up your guards

Can’t stop yourself from seeing him? Get someone else to do it. Tell all your friends in your next moment of strength, “Don’t let me call him. Don’t let me text him. Reprimand me if I see him.” This way you make yourself accountable and any time you pick up that phone, you’ll have more than just your conscience to answer to.

Do you want to hurt again?

Has this guy hurt you before? Usually that’s the case. He’s cheated on you. He’s yanked the carpet out from under you just when you thought you were getting close. Think about how much your dignity was hurt. How much you kicked yourself for letting him do exactly what you knew in your gut he would do. If it happens again, you will hurt TEN TIMES as much. Is it worth the risk?

It stays the way it starts

If you let a man be lazy in the beginning of a relationship, he will stay that way. If he wasn’t giving you what you wanted, and you stayed around, that tells him he’s allowed to act that way. If he has the control in the beginning, he always will.

Think about your friends

The ones who’ve been in your shoes and you’ve thought, What a fool! The ones who you’ve had to pry their phones out of their hands before they drunk texted the guy who’d stomped on their heart a dozen times. Think about them and know this: that’s you now. That doesn’t feel very good, does it?

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