These 6 Types of Dysfunctional Communication Are Ruining Your Relationship

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Blame Redirecting

Afro couple arguing at home

Source: GeorgiNutsov / Getty

Blame redirecting is in the same family as scorekeeping but is its own distinct behavior. In blame redirecting, a partner accuses you of doing something (that you have done), and rather than apologize, you explain that their behavior caused you to do it. When blame redirecting happens on a regular basis, it makes up the fabric of an emotionally abusive relationship. One partner never takes accountability for their actions, leaving the other walking on eggshells, always worried how they might “bring blame upon themselves.” Blame redirecting is not productive because it makes your partner feel unsafe expressing their needs and disappointment.

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