After years of betrayal and gaslighting, we watched play out on national television, the marriage between Melody and Martell Holt is over. But the two share four children. So they’ll be in one another’s lives in some capacity for a long time to come. Because their story has played out on reality television, there is a lot people have to say about the more personal aspects of their lives. And Martell is acutely aware of that. In an attempt to make himself look less guilty, he’s accused Melody of cheating on him as well. And Melody says there are constantly women in her DMs encouraging her to give Martell another chance.
But Melody is over and done with that. And moving forward, she would like her children to learn some things about her marriage and divorce. See what Melody had to say about all of this in highlights from her interview with Bossip.
Martell’s accusations of her cheating
I kind of addressed this as well in the last couple of episodes in my confessionals and my green screen interviews, but in the days when Martell and I were together, when I was with my husband, I was with my husband. Unfortunately sometimes people try to deflect when there is no where else for them to turn and so it becomes a finger pointing thing and trying to figure out who did what as far as whose fault it is so I don’t have to take responsibility right? That’s kind of what, unfortunately, what the viewers have witnessed this entire season. Almost every scene Martell is dogging me to whoever will listen.
Nevertheless, it is what it is, at the end of the day like I shared in the show, there was a point where I moved out and I moved out and got an apartment for six months and I entertained or talked to someone for three or four weeks and it was nothing more than that. You can call it what you what to call it. Was it trying to live a double life or cheating? Not to me, especially considering we didn’t have sexual intercourse, so not to me. But at the same time I wasn’t planning ever to move back with him [Martell]. I was planning to file for divorce, hence why I moved out. That’s that. Since then I’ve been gone and I moved out almost a year ago now and filed for a divorce shortly after I moved out, everyone has been trying to live their life and get closure. I think unfortunately it’s one of those situation where deflection has happened and I really don’t address. I really don’t talk about it.
Women who want her to stay
If I wanted to be with Martell right now I could be. He asks everyday almost. Let me break this down. I feel that we as women sometimes are conditioned to go with what we feel the man wants. I’ve had people say to me, ‘Please Mel don’t give up on your marriage, I can see that he still loves you.’ ‘I can see in his eyes that he wants his family.’
Why is it so much about what he wants? After he done did X, Y and Z? Why is it that I’m supposed to be excited that he still wants me? How about you want yourself more? And you want respect for yourself more, rather than going back to something that is toxic or not good for you. I don’t get that. I promise I don’t, but I can tell you my DM’s stay flooded with mostly women trying to convince me to go back into this marriage. First, it’s kind of sad to be quite honest that we as women, it’s almost like we are conditioned to be where the person wants us vs. doing what’s best for us. So I started telling them, ‘I’m sure he’s taking applications, you go over there and fill one out! If you think he’s that great…’
On the flip side I do have a lot of women who are like ‘Mel, your strength! I’ve been able to see myself and my situation through your situation and pull from your strength and I’ve been able to walk away from this situation that wasn’t good for me or benefitting me or had me depressed.’ So many different stories like that as well, so it’s definitely been an interesting ride seeing how my platform and now me being a public figure and people being able to see my life on television, the good, bad and the ugly.
How her children are handling the divorce
The fact that I have three girls, it was super important for me too knowing that they’re watching and that one day they will be their own woman. I need them to know that it doesn’t matter how convenient something may seem, just that you don’t have to remain in something that does not work for you — where you and the person have totally different viewpoints on marriage. It’s okay to walk away and there’s going to always remember and know that ‘Wow, my mom had four of us and despite her having four children she still chose to walk away from something that was not good for her.’ I know that as they grow into their own sense of womanhood one day they’ll know that they don’t have to take anything from anybody. Just knowing to have that strength as a woman to be able to get out on your own, walk away from the toxicity and still thrive and still be your own woman and still own your own purpose, that’s something they’ll continue to see and that will be a part of them. Even for my son, I need my son to know, ‘Hey if you treat a woman like this, this and this, you may lose that woman. Don’t ever think you have her tied down because you have children and businesses together that she won’t walk away from you because Son, if you ain’t treating her right, you saw Mommy walked away, she can walk away. ‘
So these are some things I know they’re seeing but overall they are doing alright. They are having to adapt to this change because all they’ve known is Mom and Dad being together under the same roof so now they are having to learn, ‘Okay sometimes we’re with Mom and sometimes we’re with Dad.’ But even in that I believe in leaving communication open and letting them know it’s okay to express how they feel and letting them know ‘You know your friend such and such? They go to Mommy’s house sometimes and their Dad’s house sometimes,’ so they know it’s not just them. We have those kind of conversations but all in all I feel my kids are doing well and I am so happy that they are able to see me happy. We’re just truly enjoying and spending time together and doing fun things together.
I think sometimes when we’re going through things you forget how it affects everyone around you because you’re feeling hurt, you’re feeling betrayed, you’re feeling angry and when you walk away from whatever is giving you those negative vibes and walking into a positive space, everyone around you feels that positive energy as well. When it comes to my children I know they see the positive energy from me and they feel the difference and the change in a positive way.
You can read the rest of Melody’s interview, here.