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Unfortunately, not all of our loved ones are capable of treating us the way that we deserve to be treated. And while we love them, we sometimes have to make the painful decision to back away and love them from a distance. Choosing to establish boundaries in a toxic or hurtful relationship is very different from cutting someone off or and not speaking to them. When you love someone from a distance, you remain committed to the relationship, but you’ve made the decision to establish firm boundaries in order to protect yourself and your peace. If you feel that you made need to put some distance between yourself and a loved one, here are a few things to keep in mind.

Check your motives

First and foremost, ask yourself why you’re distancing yourself. Are you doing it to punish the person or group for the wrong that they’ve done to you or are you doing it to guard yourself against unhealthy and hurtful behaviors? If the latter sounds like you, you’re on the right track. If you identify more with the former, you may want to step back reconsider your approach. It’s hard to truly love a person from a distance when the goal of the separation is payback.

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