Circumstances That Will Always Reveal Your Real Friends

I can vividly remember my first lesson on true friendship. I was about 8 years old staring out of the window in my grandmother’s kitchen as I bragged about how many best friends I had. I named at least 10 girls — nearly half of my fourth-grade class. My granny chuckled and told me she’d like to have this conversation again when I get to high school because I’d be lucky if I still had one best friend by then.

Though her words felt harsh at the time, truer words have never been spoken. “Friend” is a term that we use rather loosely until circumstances cause us to more deeply examine the meaning of the word. Unfortunately, this is when we often realize that the majority of our relationships don’t measure up. Here are ten life events that will help you to distinguish between your real friends and the fake ones.

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The death of a loved one

The death of a loved one has a funny way of putting things into perspective for you. Some of the friends you’d swear would be there hardly even check on you and some of the ones you’d least suspect ride for you and check up on you so often, it brings tears to your eyes.

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The birth of a child

Becoming a parent will also change the way you view your friend circle. A new baby causes your priorities to shift entirely and, oftentimes, that means you no longer serve the interest of some friends.

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A promotion at work

Unfortunately, some people are happy for you as long as you’re not doing better than they are.

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Working for a new company

When you spend 40-plus hours per week with your colleagues, they often begin to feel like friends. However, leaving the company – whether by choice or because you were let go – will show you just how strong those relationships are.

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Relocation

Some relationships are simply a matter of convenience and relocation will expose those friendships with the quickness. Out of sight, out of mind.

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Sickness

When you fall ill, you expect the people around you to rally around you and offer emotional support, at the very least. Sadly, not everyone cares about you the way that they claim they do and illness will always separate the ride or dies from the fair-weather friends.

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Divorce

In marriage, the friend circles of you and your spouse have a tendency to overlap. Their friends begin to feel like your friends and your friends start to feel like theirs. However, when a divorce takes place, you’d be surprised by how quickly people will draw a line in the sand and show you where their loyalties lie.

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Unemployment

According to a study from the Pew Research Center, more than four in ten people who are unemployed for an extended period of time lose contact with close friends. Tough times will expose your true friends every single time.

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Entrepreneurship

Embarking upon an entrepreneurship journey is another life event that will allow you to take inventory of those who are really down for you. Sometimes it’s a matter of stepping back and realizing that certain friends will never support you or your endeavors at the level that you support them. Other times, it’s simply an out of sight of mind sort of thing. Being your own boss will often leave you with little time for fun and play. Not everyone is willing to take that ride with you.