There’s a reason they call a love interest a “crush,”–it crushes you. Okay, maybe that’s a bit dramatic, but many of our crushes remain in the land of unrequited love because they rarely come to fruition in a fulfilling way. In theory, the goal isn’t to crush, it’s to be in mutual like. Being the only person pining for another in a connection can make you feel desperate and pathetic. So here are some signs that you need to cut your losses and move on.
First, if you all only text and talk on the phone without meeting face-to-face (even though you suggested it), it’s probably best to find another potential boo.
“You both flirt, and flirt, but that’s it. All the banter and innuendos go nowhere in the real world,” relationship expert Susan Winter says.
“No matter how clearly you give your crush the green light to proceed, they don’t take forward action. Even when you suggest a plan to see each other, they don’t respond or reciprocate.”
You also need to pump the breaks if you know your crush is actively dating or into someone else.
“This is a clear sign you should move on,” she says. “Whatever the mental allure, pursuing this individual will prove messy for all involved.”
You also don’t want to be so caught up in your crush that you miss opportunities to date people who are interested and invested in you. You deserve the real thing, not just a dream.
“A ‘crush’ is the lowest rung on the relationship scale. It’s more of a mental dalliance than it is anything real,” Winter said.
“Crushes lie in the land of fantasy. We ‘imagine’ an incredible romance with this person. Yet, we don’t know enough about them to know if that’s even a reality. Most of the intrigue is in our head. Keeping a firm grip on what’s real and what’s imagined will assist in determining if the crush is a viable option, or just a delicious daydream.”