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Seeking Sister Wife

Source: TLC / TLC

Earlier this month, Seeking Sister Wife star Vanessa Cobbs announced that she was leaving her relationship with the Snowdens — Dimitri and Ashley. Her decision to leave was met with a lot of commentary from fans who watch the popular TLC series, and had plenty of opinions on why she wanted out. Some viewers felt that Vanessa was being asked to change in order to fit into what the couple already have going on. That includes being persuaded to stop eating meat, give up her job and other complicated things (like having to do a cleanse for 21 days to get her pH in balance so she and Ashley wouldn’t be passing any yeast infections while they passed around Dimitri). Overall, people felt that she had to give up too much of herself in what they perceived to be a controlling environment.

But Dimitri is saying that’s not the case.

In a video posted to social media recently, he made it clear that what he shared with Vanessa was real, and that no one was pushing her to make any decisions she didn’t want to.

“Quick message for you guys. In doing some reflecting, I want to share that Vanessa is an intelligent, smart, light, bubbly, compassionate — she’s walking compassion. She’s like walking love. Fully capable of making her own decisions, right? She’s like her own woman, she’s a grown ass woman and what we had was real,” he said. “You can’t fake that level of intensity. You can’t fake that. That was real. So real that the level of bravery and the challenges, the amount of energy it took to come to this decision for us to part was beyond intense. I know there’s probably a million and one things we all could have done different and better, but at that time, we all do the best we can and you can’t know until you know. But what I do know is that was 100 [percent real].”

He stood by his sentiment, adding in the caption, “There are rarely true ‘victims’ in relationships. Some of you imply that @vanessacobbs was being ‘controlled’ or was being ‘made to change.’ If this is what you truly think, then you’re belittling the power of her free will, you’re questioning her intelligence and the fact that she is a fully aware, capable and grown ass woman exercising her own power. @vanessacobbs is literally walking love and compassion. WE know what we had together was real. end. dot. period.”

However, when Vanessa broke the news that she was calling it quits with the couple, she admitted that she wasn’t being honest with herself when it came to all of the adjustments she was attempting to make to fit in with their family.

“I love Ashley, Dimitri, and the children so much, and will continue to do so always. However, my love and commitment to them overshadowed my love and commitment to myself,” she wrote in a post on Instagram (which has since been deleted).

“I was not being truly honest with myself until recently,” she added. I was ignoring my inner guidance which was telling me that I do not belong with them in the capacity that they need me to. I now know that just because you love someone (or a family), does not necessarily mean that you are meant to be with them. Sometimes their long-established dynamic is not aligned with your own personal growth and paths forward. Thank you to all who have supported us on this journey.”

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