Why Your Parents Are Pushing You To Have Kids

June 25, 2018  |  
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Gettyimages.com/Best grandmother and siblings

I don’t know about you, but being someone who is around her thirties (if you thought I’d state my age you were dreaming) I have parents who are definitely pushing me to have children. My boyfriend and I aren’t even married yet—not that that matters—and my parents are fine with us just bypassing that step at this point. Marriage used to be the topic with which they were obsessed but, honestly, I now see it was just so we’d get it over with so we could have kids. Since they can see now, after I’ve been with my guy for over five years, that marriage isn’t quite on our radar, they’ve given up on that and just want to know when they’ll see grandbabies. Sometimes I don’t know why they care so much, so I finally pried and ask. Here is why your parents are pushing you to have kids.

Gettyimages.com/A multi-generation African-American family outdoors, in the front yard of their home. The little boy, in his mom’s arms, is 3 years old, his mother is in her 30s, and his grandfather is a senior man in his 60s.

So you have nurses one day

One very practical reason your parents want you to have kids is so that you have someone to take care of you when you’re older. They’re already seeing what a great help it is to them to have grownup children to care for them, and they like the idea of you having that same help.

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They already started a fund

Your parents probably already started an investment fund that’s meant to help you raise your kids, send your kids to college, or set them off on the right foot to buy a home some day.

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So you’ll need them again

Now that you’re an adult, you probably don’t rely on your parents for much. But they miss having you need them, and they know that, should you have kids, you’ll be running to them with plenty of questions again.

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A new reason to bond

If you have kids, then your parents can love and swoon over your children—just like you do—and you’ll suddenly, in a way, have a new shared hobby. Well, raising kids is obviously much more than a hobby, but you’ll have something you both feel responsible for.

Gettyimages.com/African descent grandmother or mother and daughter work together in their home kitchen to prepare vegetables for making a healthy salad. They toss ingredients in glass bowl.

So they can babysit

They want to babysit! If you have grandchildren, they get the chance to take care of little ones, all over again, without actually having the full burden of being parents again.

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Because they loved having you

They loved raising you. They love having children. They thought that parenting was the greatest experience ever and they want to make sure that you get to experience it, too.

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They come from that generation

On a simpler level, they just come from a generation in which everyone was expected to have children. So, some of this is just their own latent societal pressures coming through.

Gettyimages.com/Happy African American parents looking at their little son using digital tablet.

They think it’s good for your marriage

They think that having children is important for keeping the connection between a couple alive. They know how close they became after raising children together, and they want the same for your relationship.

Gettyimages.com/Worried attractive young African American woman looking down with her forehead resting on her hand in a close up head and shoulders on white

They don’t want you to regret not

They just don’t want you to regret not having children. Since they loved having kids so much, they imagine that, if anyone doesn’t, that that person will regret it.

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To keep the bloodline going

On a vanity level, they want to keep the bloodline going. And maybe they have no other way of doing that if you don’t make children.

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Kids make them feel youthful

Playing with little children makes anyone feel youthful. Your parents just want the chance to laugh and roll around on the ground with munchkins so they can feel like children again themselves.

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They’re retired and want to spoil them

If your parents are retired, then they probably have a lot of time on their hands and aren’t quite sure what to do with it. But they wouldn’t mind spending it on spoiling their grandchildren.

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To know they didn’t scare you away from it

To some degree, they may just want you to have kids so that they know that their parenting styles and your childhood didn’t scare you away from the idea of family. At least if you have kids, they can know that they didn’t ruin the concept for you.

Gettyimages.com/Sister helps sister with her make up for homecoming

So your sibling’s kids will have cousins

If one of your siblings has children, then your parents probably want them to have cousins. They know how special the relationship can be between cousins.

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They want to watch you be a parent

They want to enjoy watching you be a parent. They think you’d be a great one. They’d get some pride in knowing that they passed on great parenting skills to you.

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