Don’t sleep on that relationship with your boyfriend’s mom. If you know you’re going to spend the rest of your life with this man, then his mom is as good as a mother-in-law. The earlier you start to nurture that relationship, the happier you all will be. Remember that there are two women who love your man more than anyone in this world: you, and his mother. It’s better to be a team, than two competitors when it comes to caring for your partner. Plus, if you’re going to be family one day, you’re going to spend a lot of time together, and you’re going to need to be there for each other. You may as well enjoy that, and have some rapport with his mom. She can be your ally, your shopping buddy, your mentor, and so much more. Here are perks of befriending your boyfriend’s mom.
Get backup on his health
In case you haven’t noticed, men aren’t the best at making doctors appointments and checking up on symptoms. You can try, on your own, to care for your partner’s health, but it would really help to get some backup from his mother—his original nurse.
Understand him better
When you get to know your boyfriend’s mother, you get to know him better. Understanding her personality, and hearing stories about his upbringing that perhaps he doesn’t share, will better help you understand some of his behaviors that have always baffled you.
Get gift ideas
His mom probably knows what he really needs. Maybe there are some things he has asked to borrow from her and his dad, over and over again. Or something he’s asked to borrow money to buy. She can give you the inside scoop on this stuff. She can also tell you about some nostalgic gifts that might take him back to his childhood.
Hang with her when he’s busy
Sometimes, when his mom is in town, your boyfriend will be busy, and it will be up to you to hang with her for the day and entertain her. In fact, this will happen a lot. It’s so much more fun if you two already feel like pals.
Show her he’s taken care of
It’s important that his mom gets to know you, too, so she can see that her baby boy is well taken care of. Every mom desperately wants to know that her son’s partner looks out for him when she can’t.
Get her on your team
It doesn’t hurt to have your boyfriend’s mom adore you, and tell him that she adores you all of the time. It shouldn’t influence his feelings about you either way, but it will make him more eager to bring you home for holidays because he will feel like everyone is winning.
Now you have two moms to give you fabulous hand-me-downs. Or, hey, maybe your mom’s style isn’t quite your style but his mom’s style is. Later, she might have hand-me-downs for your children.
Sometimes, you can’t talk to your mom
There are some matters on which, you could really use a mother’s opinion, but talking to your own mom about them is just uncomfortable. Your boyfriend’s mom can be perfect for those sensitive topics.
An extra babysitter
That’s one more free babysitter when you have children. And if you feel really close to your partner’s mom, then when you leave your kids with her, you’ll feel totally at ease.
Help with the holidays
When it’s your turn to start hosting holiday meals, you can either have his mom trying to do things her way and push your vision aside, or you can have his mom helping you with your vision.
A place to stay
If your boyfriend’s mom lives in another city, and you’re friends, then you’ll always have a place to stay when you visit that town. And it won’t be awkward, even if your boyfriend can’t come with you.
More nurture and care
Everybody could use a little more nurture and love in their lives. There is no such thing as too much of that. When you are close with your boyfriend’s mom, that is one more person who genuinely cares about your wellbeing and wants to help you in any way she can.
You may need cosigners
One day, you may need your partner’s parents to cosign on a loan for the two of you to buy a home. If his mom knows you well, and knows you are responsible, she will encourage the dad to say yes, too.
Better communication about grandkids
It’s important to start developing a clear and open dialogue about all sorts of things now, so that when you have grandkids, talking about their care will be a breeze.
Get backup on major decisions
When your partner is trying to decide whether or not to take this job/make that investment, sometimes you just know what’s best for him, more than he knows. His mom knows, too. Together, you can guide him in the right direction.