Known for her short stories and fiction, Bad Feminist author Roxane Gay’s next piece of work is set to tackle the effects of sexual violence, in particular, Gay’s own life-changing experience with it.
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Her upcoming memoir, Hunger, will detail the 42-year-old’s emotional journey and relationship with not only food but her body after being gang-raped when she was 12.
Gay grew up in Omaha, Nebraska, raised by Haitian parents. She had a seemingly positive childhood and excelled in school. But after being raped by a boy she liked along with his friends in a cabin in the woods in 1986, everything changed. PEOPLE obtained an exclusive excerpt from the book, set to be released this year.
“Everything I thought I knew was shattered,” she said.
Gay kept the assault from her parents, and instead, turned to food. She wanted to change her body from lean and lanky to what she called a “fortress” to keep from being attacked again.
“I didn’t ever want to be over-powered again,” she said. “I thought if I’m fat, boys won’t come after me. I wanted to make myself bigger.”
She continued on that path with food, and at her largest weight, Gay’s topped 577 pounds. PEOPLE pointed out that despite everything, she has had success as a writer and with romance, as she’s in a committed relationship with another woman, but that attack is something that has greatly impacted her work. She hopes that by releasing Hunger, she can give people insight into “how much suffering is born of sexual violence” and release some demons.
