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Do you think you want a relationship, but when you look at couples in romantic restaurants, you find yourself also thinking, yawn. Every woman is a wild child at some point in her life. In fact, I encourage every woman to be before settling down! The thing about your wild child phase, though, is that you have to finish it before you can get into a relationship…a relationship that will stick, that is. Trying to force the phase to end too early will only leave you A) Constantly disappointing your boyfriends because you’re so damn flighty or B) Remaining in a relationship that makes you feel stifled, smothered, and suffocated! If you already associate those words with relationships, then you probably know you’re not ready to settle down. But in case you needed more insight into whether or not you’re ready to commit to one person, here are some signs you may not be.
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You can’t stand to be alone for an hour
You won’t find a healthy, happy relationship until you can learn to be without one. If you crash on friend’s couches, or constantly text people to see what everyone’s up to because being alone for an hour gives you anxiety, then you’re not ready to settle down. You’d be too dependent on your partner.
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You often wake up in places that aren’t your bed
Not necessarily in a sleeping-around way, but in a you were too drunk/the sun was already beginning to rise/you just wanted to cuddle/you missed the last subway of the night kind of way. You get the idea. If you can’t turn down enough to sleep in your own bed, at least four nights a week, then you’re not ready to settle down.
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You have 10 giant trips planned
You very much plan on traveling around the world. You already have a two-week trip to Bali planned, a month-long trip to Europe, a two-month volunteering opportunity set up in Mexico and another month you put aside to just hit the open road, with no particular destination. Where’s a boyfriend going to fit in with that?
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It pains you to miss a chance to see and be seen
You must know, on any given night, what the happening spots are. You don’t say “happening” of course because you are very happening yourself. But you get full-blown anxiety thinking that you missed the event lined with paparazzi, a red carpet and table service that evening. You would never give that up for Netflix.
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On that note, you’re looking everywhere
You’re a little boy crazy. You fall in love every 10 minutes. You swear that every barista who winks at you or guy who makes you laugh in line for the bathroom is the one…and then you forget he exists five seconds later when another cutie passes by. Usually, when you can picture yourself with everyone, it’s because you’re not quite sure who you are yet.
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Thinking of marriage makes you dizzy
You cannot picture yourself standing at the top of an aisle reciting vows. It’s almost like your brain blacks out when you try it. The experience of getting married feels a million miles away from you, and you don’t want it coming any closer.
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You never fully commit to a social plan
You never tell anybody that you will for sure be at their party because you like to keep yourself open for better opportunities that might come up. How can you be expected to keep a date night with your boo like that?
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You don’t keep a calendar
In fact, you don’t keep a calendar at all. Your motto is, “I do what I want when I feel like it.” It’s definitely gotten you in some trouble over missed appointments with dentists and CPAs.
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You’re in your sexual exploratory phase
You have a list of things you’d like to try in the bedroom, like S&M, furrying (is that a verb?), video recording, you name it there’s a list of partners you want to try it with.
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You post an enormous amount of selfies
Women who post several selfies a day are usually in that phase of life when they still crave lots of attention. They’re similar to the women who cannot be alone.
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You’re a shopaholic in a real way
You have packages showing up at your door that you don’t even remember ordering. You have enough clothes to open up a shop in your home. Shopaholism is usually indicative of some internal void–you might want to work that out before getting into a relationship.
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You demand exciting (often expensive) dates
You are actually offended when a guy suggests just grabbing drinks at a local bar or making your dinner for a date. You think all dates should somehow end up on a yacht or a DJ booth.
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You had to live alone because you couldn’t handle roommates
You don’t just live alone because it’s nice–you live alone because your particularities and, well, let’s call them “quirks,” drove your roommates away. You’re so set on having things your way that nobody could possibly live up to your standards.
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You’re currently seeing three guys at once
When you really know who you are and what you want in a partner, you won’t find yourself dating three guys at once. It will be hard to find yourself even dating one guy at once because the reality is you are incompatible with most people out there. When you understand yourself better, that will be clear very soon with most guys.
