Passive Aggressive Moves Your Boyfriend’s Family Might Pull
The good news is that if your boyfriend’s family is pulling these stunts on you, it’s probably because they know he’s serious about you. The bad news is that you’ll have to survive these stunts. Here are some passive aggressive moves your boyfriend’s family might pull on you.
Take you somewhere cheap
To make sure you’re not gold digging, his dad might suggest you all go to Taco Bell for dinner.
Love Taco Bell!
You’ll probably just have to dine at hole in the wall joints until you’ve proved that your intentions are honest.
His siblings might try to gross you out
To make sure you accept their brother the way he is, they’ll tell you every story of every time he got food poisoning.
Share your own story
You see their story of food poisoning and you raise them the story of the time your appendix burst. You’re not afraid of a little gore.
Compare you to his ex
It will be in a good way—his mom might say you’re much more ambitious than his last girlfriend or much more laid back—but it’s still a comparison and it puts the pressure on. Anyone knows the smart thing is to not mention exes at all.
Compare him to your ex
Show you’re comfortable with the fact that you both have pasts. Show you’re mature enough to understand that people learn and grow from their mistakes and failed relationships, and that you’re glad your partner has had experiences. His mom is watching to see if you quiver with jealousy—so don’t.
Offer to fix your home
His parents might offer to get a rug so it’s “easier to keep the hallway clean” (translation: the hallway is dirty) or get a container for your drying rack to “avoid water stains on the counter” (translation: there are hideous water stains on the counter.)
Just go with it
The real test here is to see if you get defensive over small things. They won’t see you as a pushover if you agree to their help. In fact, they’ll like you more for it. But they will see you as stubborn if you defend everything.
Ask you to criticize him
There will come a time when your man’s mom will say about him, “He really needs new clothes don’t you think?” or, “He should really be more proactive about his career, don’t you think?” and you’ll have no idea what to say.
Whatever you say, say you love him
If you defend your guy, you’re disagreeing with his mom and making it seem like you don’t care about his improvement. If you totally agree, she’ll feel like you’re attacking her boy. In the most gentle way say she is correct, but then say how that “flaw” of his is directly connected to something you love about him. He is messy, but that’s just a part of him being a creative type, which you love.
His brother might make you seem controlling
You’re potentially taking his brother’s best friend away from him. There might be a little jealousy there. His brother might try to point out how you’re standing in the way of he and his brother having fun.
Wait it out
There’s not much you can do there. Men are protective of their brothers and want to make sure they don’t get tied down to a total witch. If you’re not a total witch, his brother will eventually see that.
His sister might make you feel high maintenance
Women with brothers can feel like they “get men” more than other women. Your man’s sister might try to point out ways that you’re too “girly.”
When she says you’re being high maintenance or difficult, agree with her. Make fun of yourself. Beat her to the punch line.
Put you in separate rooms
To test that you’re a “decent” woman, and that you can hold your own in their home without your man by your side all the time, the family might have you two sleep in separate rooms.
Revel in it
Crack jokes about how great that is because your partner snores anyways, or you get up to pee so much you prefer having the bathroom to yourself.