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If you sense that things are getting serious with a guy, you should talk about your goals for a number of reasons. For instance, reasons like ensuring that you both want to live in the same place, ensuring that you both do or don’t want kids, and definitely, what expectations you would have of one another if you were to take your relationship to the next level and get married. Because the last thing you want is there to be any misunderstandings about what you will and won’t be doing…like working. Here are signs that he wants you to be a housewife but hasn’t said anything about it yet. If that’s not what you want, a conversation needs to be had ASAP.
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He tells you that your job “changes you”
When you come home from work, he comes down on you for being anxious, or mean, or short with him and tells you that your job “changes you.” He’ll say this about every job until you start doubting whether or not you want to work at all.
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He tells you that you’re not appreciated at your job
He picks apart your coworkers and bosses, telling you that you’re not appreciated at every job you work at. He’ll do this until you finally “realize” the person who appreciates you most is him. Or until he manipulates you into thinking that.
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He doesn’t ask follow-up questions about your job
When you vent about your job, he noticeably just nods or sighs–but doesn’t engage in the conversation.
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He tunes out when you talk about work
He’s extremely animated until you bring up work. Then he starts scrolling through his social media on his phone or looks for a way to turn on the television.
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He makes plans for you
He tells you the two of you will be going to dinner with friends next weekend. He assumes your time is his time and complains when he feels like your job is getting in the way of that, saying “you work too much!”
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He asks you to change your plans to be his date
He wants you to accompany him to a dinner or work event. You say you have plans, and he asks if you can change them. He convinces you that doing things with him should be your priority.
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He feels some type of way when you spend too much with other people
When you tell him you’re going to do something he says, “You didn’t even ask me if maybe I wanted to do something that day.”
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He asks you to clean up after him
From asking you to wash his clothes to expecting you to be at his beck and call after you’ve had a long day at work, he’s doing the most.
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He calls you five times a day
He’s just completely oblivious to the fact that you’re working or have something to do other than speak to him on the phone. Correction: You’ll actually just be listening to him tell you all about his day and his problems on the phone until he’s done venting and suddenly has to get back to his work.
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He gets you gifts that are more like responsibilities
He buys you a new car (a very showy one that makes no sense for your everyday life), a dog to take care of, some sort of kitchen item to cook with and other things that aren’t really your style.
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He leaves you with his mom–who’s a housewife
When you go over for dinner to his parents’ place, he goes off with his dad and leaves you in the kitchen with his mom. If his parents have a dynamic in which his mother is a housewife, you can almost bet that he wants the same of his marriage.
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He doesn’t eat unless you’re cooking
When you see him he tells you he hasn’t eaten anything substantial in the last few hours because he was hoping you could whip something up. He’s conditioning you to plan meals for him or cook for him early so that it doesn’t seem like a chore later on.
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He pays when you insist it makes you uncomfortable
When he wants to do something you can’t afford, he pays even after you’ve begged him not to. Even after you’ve demanded he put his wallet away, he shows up with those plane tickets or concert tickets. He wants to force you into letting him be your financial caretaker.
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He gets angry when you won’t take off work for him
When he wants to travel, he gets upset that you won’t ask for the days off work to go with him. He tells you you’re not prioritizing the relationship enough.
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He doesn’t like going to your place
Night after night, weekend after weekend, he wants you to be at his place, doing what he feels like doing. You try to encourage him to come hang out around your way and he’s not feeling it. He likes to come home and find you in his place, in his environment.
