Relationships are very central to our lives, especially intimate relationships. A relationship can teach us a lot about ourselves if we are open enough to learn. But a relationship should not be full of personal sacrifices that we may eventually regret. After all, the point of being involved with other people is to increase our happiness, not deplete it. Here is a list of things no one should do for love.Ever.
A relationship carried by one person financially will lead to lots of resentment. If you’re the one in the relationship paying for everything all the time then it’s time for a serious conversation or time to make plans to do free stuff.
Get a Tattoo
That Drake verse “tattoo my name on you so I know it’s real” is cute, but in real life having to get a tattoo removed isn’t; it’s actually painful. Even if you’re married it’s not a good idea to tattoo your partner’s name on you because it’s just not logical. If you’re pressured into getting a tattoo then you should probably re-think the relationship.
Sometimes during relationships a friendship, or two, my fall to the wayside, but ending a friendship because of your relationship is pretty damn foul. If you’re with someone who doesn’t want you to have friends, that is a sign of abuse. Friendships are just as important as romantic relationships especially ones that preceded your relationship.
Beg for Attention
If you’re begging for attention from your mate, it may well be time to give up that relationship.There are essentials in a relationship and attention is one of them. When you feel the need to consistently bring up the lack of attention you’re getting, it’s a sign that things may be heading south.
If you become too invested in making your mate happy, you may very well begin too lose yourself. You’re no good in a relationship if it’s one-sided and you deplete yourself. If you stop doing the things that make you happy you will resent the relationship and it becomes destructive to yourself.
Have an Open Door Policy
It isn’t healthy to allow every person you meet into your life. Having a part of yourself that is only for you is healthy and necessary. An open door policy in love allows too many people in and that can be destructive; there isn’t anything wrong with being selective.
Settling is the worst thing to do in any situation. It’s quite easy to know when you’re settling. There will always be a nagging voice within you saying “there’s more out there for you.” Listen to that voice and spread your wings, you won’t regret it.
Taking on your mate’s problems is not a requirement in your relationship. Being open to listening and help them through their problems is a good way to lend a hand, but once you start making their problems yours, it becomes a slippery slope downhill. Recognize when you re taking on too much and relieve yourself of burdens that are not yours…quick!
Lying to people or for people are equally wrong. If you feel you have to lie about anything for the sake of your relationship, you are in an unhealthy situation. A person that loves you will not want you to sacrifice your morals for their benefit.
Change is a personal feat. No one can make you change unless you are open to that change. When a relationship makes you shift too much of who you are it’s time to start re-thinking the point of your relationship.
Love is not a competition. You should never have to compete for attention, for a man or a woman. Having to compete takes away from the time that could be spent cultivating a healthy relationship.
Eartha Kitt said it best “Compromise for what?” It is true that many relationship experts believe compromise and sacrifice are essential for a relationship, but you have to have a clear understanding of why it’s necessary for you to compromise first and know that beliefs and morals are non-negotiable.