Man Up: How To Stay A Lady But Act Like A Man On The Job - Page 4

In Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man: What Men Really Think About Love, Relationships, Intimacy, and Commitment, Steve  Harvey tried to teach women how to think like a man to establish a good romantic relationship. But you can also take the theory and apply it to the workplace. Sometimes to get ahead in the corporate world you need to know how to play like the big boys.

It’s not that you have to become one of the boys, but it helps to understand how the men in your field think, especially if you are in male-dominated industry. 

Men complain that women are too emotional on the job; that they take criticism to heart and are unable to separate the business from the personal. “Men assume that the presence of emotion means you’re not thinking, because the male brain is not wired to be able to process those emotions and those thoughts together at the same time as easily, so you kind of have to shut down emotion in order to think clearly. Women can be processing a strong emotion and thinking clearly at the same time. Our brains are actually wired specifically to do that,” Shaunti Feldhahn, author of The Male Factor: The Unwritten Rules, Misperceptions, and Secret Beliefs of Men in the Workplace, tells The Globe & Mail.

Here are 11 ways for you to think more “like a man” at the office, while never letting them forget you’re a savvy businesswoman.

Straight To The Point

Women usually try to finesse an issue or feel out the other person before broaching a subject. Men–they go straight to the punch.

“Women have a tendency to dance around the topic instead of getting straight to the point, and often drag a thought or topic out for an extended length of time. Men, by comparison, are more likely to state their thoughts directly and promptly, and a man will rarely pick up on the fact that there is an underlying concern or matter that a woman in his life has on her mind,” reports Wiki How.  While it is sometimes good to censor your thought, to deal better with the men in your work life, skip the hints and tell them what’s on your mind.

Stop Being A Worrywart

Women have a tendency to overthink things and worry. Men however usually take action on the issue and once something is said. And done they don’t linger over it. “Research shows that at any given time the rate of generalized anxiety in men is 33 percent. In women, it’s a whopping 66 percent,” Holly Hazlett-Stevens, PhD, associate professor of clinical psychology at the University of Nevada in Reno and author of Women Who Worry Too Much: How to Stop Worry & Anxiety from Ruining Relationships, Work, & Fun, told Mother Nature Network. So don’t worry over things out of your control. Your constant thought on the subject won’t change things. Men think about things they can control.

Don’t Shy Away From Workplace Disagreements 

Women worry about getting along with co-workers and bosses. And if there is a disagreement, women sometimes let it fester. Men tend to enter into conflict and once it’s over, it’s over. “Men get to the underlying issue while women tend to worry about the interpersonal dynamics,” Sara Laschever, coauthor with Linda C. Babcock, PhD, of Women Don’t Ask, tells Woman’s Day. But if a women disagrees with a co-worker, she might tend to take it personally and feel attacked. So instead of being “attacked,” women back away from conflict.

But sometimes workplace conflict is necessary — it’s how new ideas and point of views are expressed.  “First, recognize that not all on-the-job conflict is bad,” says Emily Amanatullah, PhD, assistant professor of management at McCombs School of Business at the University of Texas at Austin. “It can often be very constructive in working through deadlocks. Sometimes you need to rock the boat to be productive.”

You Don’t Need To Be Perfect

Trying to always improve is not a bad thing. But sometimes perfectionism can get in the way of progress. According to an Auburn University study, women tend to feel inadequate at work more often, statistically, because women are more perfectionistic.

“Men tend to be risk takers, so they accept that they may fall flat sometimes,” Steven Rhoads, PhD, professor of politics at the University of Virginia and author of Tells Women’s Day. “Women, however, care more about what others think and often only feel good about themselves when every aspect of their lives is going well.”

Try to take a few more risks at work. They might pay off.

Be Satisfied With Your Looks

Women sometimes get caught up in looks instead of focusing on talents. Of course, you should present yourself professionally but try to stress the things you can do that make you stand out from the crowd.

So show off your skills. “There is no need to underestimate your accomplishments, woman are said to attain skills quicker than men however, are often let down by their confidence and consequently diminishing their get-ahead tactics,” reports Spicy Broccoli.

Ask For What You Want

Men tend to ask for what they want. And women think this is pushy. But it is necessary in the business world. “From a young age, girls are taught to be compliant and not too demanding,” Sara Laschever, coauthor of Women Don’t Ask, tells Woman’s Day.

But being demanding can lead to backlash for women.

“Even when we try, we’re branded as high-maintenance, unlikable and not a team player,” adds Emily Amanatullah, PhD, assistant professor of management at McCombs School of Business at the University of Texas at Austin. “Men, however, get positive feedback for putting themselves forward.”

So practice asking for what you want in a calm, relaxed, natural manner. Says Laschever, “Unfortunately, style is critical for women. You still have to come across as upbeat and likable, no matter what you’re asking for.”

There’s No Crying In Business

I worked with one highly successful woman who has head of a major publication. She would come out of meetings with the publisher and ad reps flustered. She’d lock herself in her office and cry. The men, however, would come out smiling, joking, talking about their weekend plans. They were able to leave the heated discussions in the room, while my editor carried them with her throughout the day.

But if you do get emotional, do it in private where no one, not even other women, can see. You want to convey authority and calm.

Speak Up

In business negotiations or meetings there is no time to be tentative. “Woman are often wary about voicing their opinions and appear unsure of themselves even when they know very well what they’re talking about,”reports Spicy Broccoli.  Be confident and speak up.

Go Solo

Women are often considered collaborative, instead of leaders. And tend to seek feedback and then take action shaped on the feedback. Men tend to just their own judgment and go straight to the action phase. We’re not saying it bad to get feedback, but sometimes trust your gut… as Olivia Pope would do.

Take Charge 

You are in your position because you know whet you’re doing — so act like it! “Women often face dilemmas in the work place and let it get it to them, fixing these matters will be your first step to success, the second, hold on to it! Keep that enthusiasm and faith you had when you started, it will support you throughout your ventures,” reports Spicy Broccoli.