As far as I know, I’ve never dated a bisexual man. That’s not to say that I wouldn’t if I were single and given the opportunity, but I’ve just never been faced with that choice. There was a time when I thought bisexual men didn’t even really exist. My feeling was that if a man could get aroused by another man, he was gay; but, who am I to question another person’s sexuality? If you claim to be bisexual, so be it.
But recent photos of Tyson Beckford getting all hot and steamy with a transgendered woman left me wondering if I’d ever date a man who admitted to having kissed or had any other form of sexual contact with another man. Could I get the visual out of my head? Would I be considered close minded if I couldn’t do it? Should it matter?
Women tend to get a pass when it comes to this sort of thing. We are allowed to be more sexually fluid than men, and it seems rare to meet a guy who will turn away a woman because she also dates and has sexual relations with other women. Bisexual women are more accepted and to a lot of men, she’s considered more desirable. But men? Not so much. Some women even “pretend” to be interested in women in order to get a guy’s attention because they know some men have that fantasy. But you never hear of two guys making out on the dance floor in order to get a woman’s attention. It just doesn’t happen that way.
Most women would fear dating a bisexual guy for fear that he might “turn completely gay” on them at a moment’s notice and leave them for a man. They believe, like I once did, that he’s really gay and just hasn’t accepted his sexuality so he’s hiding in the “bisexuality closet.” For them, it is too much of a risk so no matter how handsome or nice he might be, many women will just choose to keep on walking.
Another reason a woman may not be able to date a bisexual man is because they feel they’re not just competing with other women, but with other men as well. She’s competing with everyone. This seems silly when you think about it, because if a man wants to stray, he will do it and his sexual orientation doesn’t matter. Yet in some strange, twisted way, women consider bisexual men to be more promiscuous and untrustworthy than their straight or gay counterparts.
Tyson Beckford is considered hot by many women, so seeing him kissing on a gorgeous transgendered woman sent some of them into a tizzy. But I’m willing to bet there are still some women out there who couldn’t care less that he was all hugged up with a hot woman and would still give him the chance if given the opportunity. At the end of the day, he still embodies what most of us women consider to be masculine characteristics, and a fine man is still a fine man!
No matter a person’s sexual orientation, love is just a risk…plain and simple. The only way to not get your heart broken is to steer totally clear of dating. Not dating someone because they’re bisexual is usually about your own fear and thought process – acknowledge the truth and deal with it accordingly. Worrying about if he’s going to leave you shouldn’t just depend on his sexual preference, but your own security. If he’s interested in you, is honest, shows you respect and that he can be trustworthy, then him being bisexual should only mean that out of all the men and women in the world, he wants you. I know, that sounds much easier said than done but it could be totally helpful.
So what say you? Would you be able to date a bisexual man?
