Decoded: What His Texts Mean When He's Mad
So What Are You Saying? What His Texts Mean When He’s Mad
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Fighting over text is probably the least effective way to handle an issue. But, sometimes, you know that if you get on the phone you’ll just scream, or an argument happens to come up when one of you is stuck around other people for the next 12 hours, and you’re forced to decide what your next move is based on a few typed words. Here is what his texts mean when he’s mad.
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“I can’t hang out tonight”
Guys don’t really do the “punishing” thing, so if you and your guy had plans, but then you get into an argument and he cancels them, he’s probably just trying to protect you from his ugly side and would rather wait to see you when he knows he can control his temper again.
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“Sure, whatever” (In response to you asking him to get coffee/dinner)
After dozens of texts back and forth and getting nothing resolved, you finally write, “Can we just get coffee and talk about this?” And he says, “Sure, whatever.” Basically, he expects the coffee conversation to be a one-way talk where he’ll sit have to sit through you lecturing him or pushing your point of view and you won’t actually be willing to hear him out.
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“It’s fine, babe, just let it go”
You screwed up, he’s clearly hurt, and now you’re apologizing profusely. When he gives you this brush off text, I’ll be honest, it’s not good: it means he just discovered something negative about you that he never thought you were capable of.
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When he texts 10 times in a row
Some men will spew out hurtful texts in an argument, one after another, bringing up issues and insulting you in ways that have nothing to do with the argument. When a guy is doing this, he is in, “I want to win” mode, and not in a place to have a real conversation. Just let him vent his frustrations, but don’t respond. It will at first make him angrier, but a few hours later make him realize he was being a child.
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When he takes 10 hours to reply at all
He’s trying to tell you that this argument isn’t worth his time, so much so, that he forgot it was even happening and went to hang with his friends and never checked his phone. He’s just trying to hurt you, but in reality he needed space.
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One-word answers
When you’re getting the one-word replies, he thinks this argument should have been over a long time ago. Now he’s just indulging all the final remarks you feel you need to say, but really wants to leave things at the settlement you agreed upon and walk away.
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“I don’t care”
When a guy texts “I don’t care,” he’s never cared more. OR, he has never cared less. Guys either say this when you’ve hurt them so badly that if you were arguing in person, they’d have to turn their face so you wouldn’t see their tears. OR, they say it when you’re picking an argument they’re not even trying to have—in other words when you’re fighting with yourself.
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“Why don’t you just come over and we can have sex”
This is a very tricky maneuver that, if I’m being honest, bad guys make in arguments. They want to insinuate that your relationship is purely physical, so they have no problem having sex with you while you’re arguing. Essentially, they want to pretend they’re not emotionally invested in you, so they can have sex with you under any circumstances.
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“Whatever you say”
A guy will text this when it’s clear to him you don’t see his side of things—not even a little—and aren’t even willing to try. He texts this when he knows you just want to be right, so arguing would be futile.
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“I just want to be with my friends tonight, okay?”
Here your guy is trying to imply that you are not his friend, and you’re not any of the other things associated with friendship like warmth, understanding, and pleasure. He wants to make you feel like you’re the enemy, and everyone else is on his side.
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“I just need a drink”
This text could mean a combination of things: a manipulative man might say this to make you feel like you’re so unbearable, you’re driving him to unhealthy behaviors. But some guys really do just need one stiff drink when they’re upset. It’s not an angry drink or in any way emotionally unhealthy; it’s just an hour they get to calm down, and let their thoughts relax a little during a tumultuous time.
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“Why don’t you just talk to your mom about this”
If a guy texts this, then you probably gab to your mom about your relationship too much. And your guy probably thinks your mom puts dumb ideas in your head.
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“Can you just give me some time?”
This is the most painful text to get because you have no idea how much time your guy will need, and you don’t know if it will be days or weeks before you hear from him again. But the one thing you’re not allowed to do is ask, “How much time?” That defeats the purpose of him taking time away from you. He just needs to think, without the pressure of a time crunch.
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“I don’t want to talk on the phone”
He is so worked up, that if he can communicate as fast as his mouth would let him, he knows he would say some things he could never take back.
