Online Date Much? What His Profile Pictures Say About His Personality - Page 13

When online dating, you are bombarded with potential matches every day. The human is a visual creature so, admit it: you don’t read a guy’s profile if you don’t like his photo. You don’t have to love it, but pretty close or else he gets the ax. And for once in life, you are right to judge a book by its cover when it comes to online dating. But not necessarily in the way you would expect. It’s not all about a handsome face, a well put together outfit and a fit body. Because a man may have those in his profile photo, but if you disregard his other dozen photos, you could be in for a disappointing date, or even relationship.

The professional photographer

Think about it: he lacked so much confidence in his own ability to take a photo that was flattering and/or representative of himself, that he shelled out hundreds of dollars on professional photos. That can only mean three bad things: he is either A) Vain (think about it: your normal guy is happy with some good lighting and a flattering t-shirt) B) Unattractive and needed the help of a professional to brush that over or C) Doesn’t know himself at all. Anyone should be able to take a photo of himself and know what face to make, what shirt to wear, and where to pose. If you a guy can’t figure out such basic things, he hasn’t figured himself out.

Animals everywhere

He’s an animal lover. That’s great! But, if you know a thing or two about human psychology, then you know that when a person obsesses over anything—animals, their car, shoes—it’s because it helps them avoid working on their issues. When it comes down to it, it helps them avoid working on loving what is the most complicated, but rewarding thing to love: a human. If a guy has more than two photos of his pet, you might be dealing with a man that runs off to hug is dog and say, “You’re so much better than people” any time you pick a fight.

The bathroom, self-taken

This is never good. First off, did this person have no one to take the photo for him? Perhaps not…that means no friends, family or roommate that like him enough to help him out. Or, perhaps he does have someone he could ask, but he isn’t telling anybody he is online dating. And then you have a different issue on your hands with a man that will either force you to make up stories of how you met in a bar if you ever meet his friends and family, or a man that is ashamed of wanting love. And that’s a psychological Pandora’s box in and of itself.

No smiles

This is one that many women fail to notice. So long as a man looks happier than clinically depressed, and is handsome, he can get away with not smiling in his photos. But think about yourself when somebody points that camera at you. You smile! That is what a normal, sociable, confident person does. This is a really simple, get out of jail free card tip so take it: if a man does not smile in photos, he does not smile often in life. Either because he is depressed, or he has very low self esteem (i.e. couldn’t even let himself go long enough to smile for a photo. Ever.)

Always with friends

You definitely want to see that a man has an active social life so that he isn’t too dependent on you and so that you know he is likeable. However, if a man hasn’t had one opportunity in months to just get a solo picture that isn’t at a bar or party, or surrounded by five other people, you may have trouble getting alone time with him! Remember: people put out what they want you to know about them in their profiles. If he only has photos of him partying or in large social gatherings, he wants you to know that he is always socializing.

Never with friends

Also be wary of the guy that has zero pictures with friends. Typically, when the camera comes out, it’s in a social setting. So, if he doesn’t have any social photos that’s probably because he doesn’t have any social life.

Can’t see his face

It’s no accident if you can’t see his face! Maybe you see a side shot in which his nose looks good, or a birds-eye shot that makes his eyes look pretty. But come on: even the dumbest of online daters know that you need to have a head-on, looking right at the camera photo. If he doesn’t have one, that’s on purpose. And again, remember, in social settings he didn’t get away with that. The person with the camera made him retake that photo a dozen times until he was finally looking. So he has photos in which you could see his face, he is just choosing not to show them.

No pictures of him

You know one thing: he’s a great photographer! And you know this because he took some lovely photos of Yosemite park, and his parents toasting at their anniversary, and the sunset. But you don’t see him anywhere. Maybe there is an ant-size sillouette of him far off in a photo of a desert. If a man posts no photos of himself, he is either deformed, majorly insecure, or (and this is usually the case) doesn’t love himself enough. He is used to being the fly on the wall. He doesn’t know how to accept attention and affection.

Five different haircuts

A guy seems cute, but there’s just one problem: you have no concept of what he actually looks like today! He has a beard in one photo, is clean-shaven in the next, has dreads in the following, and is bald after that! What this typically means is that you’re dealing with a man that genuinely thinks looks don’t matter. All you should care about is his personality and spirit. And he believes this so much so that he sees no problem with posting ten different people that could be him.

There’s an ex in there

You see her once, maybe just her hair because he cut her out of a photo. Or, you see her in the background of a photo. Perhaps he shamelessly has his arm around her. Either way, she is there. And that’s not good! It either means they broke up so recently that his only up to date photos have her in them (and he’s not ready to move on in that case) or he is such a relationship addict, that the only photos he has at all are of him and some ex girlfriend.

All athletic photos

He’s camping, or rock climbing, or dirt biking, or deep sea diving. He’s always active. And that doesn’t only mean athletically but also figuratively. If he doesn’t have one photo of him relaxing, perhaps drinking wine with friends, the guy can’t sit still! Know this at least: he is an active, outdoors man, and if you are any less than that yourself, you won’t get to spend any time together. So if you’re a couch potato wino, don’t date wilderness guy because you think it will be a nice change of pace. You’ll just be dragged to activities you don’t want to do before he finally realizes you’re not a good fit.

All career-oriented photos

Here’s my brand new laptop, here is the view from my hotel room (for my work trip), here is Ireland! (where I went for work) Here is the office dog. Don’t be fooled: a workaholic can make their photos like dynamic. But he is still a workaholic. And that’s either because work literally takes up all of his time, or because nobody likes him/he doesn’t know how to socialize.

His belongings

His nice car, his boat, his giant walk in closet. It’s never okay to post pictures of your expensive stuff! It’s tacky, condescending and screams, “I think I can buy women.” Don’t even think, “Oh, he didn’t realize how it looked.” People know how their Lamborghini looks. The truly humble, tactful man looking for real love purposefully omits photos of his expensive items.

A healthy balance

What you want to see is a healthy balance of solo photos (that clearly a friend took and not a professional photographers) to show they’re comfortable relaxing and are confident about their appearance, a photo or two with friends to show that they are social, maybe (but not necessary) a photo that has to do with their job (so you know they have one) and absolutely, no exceptions, a photo of themselves that shows their face.