Soft Girls Don’t Chase—They Choose: Why Black Women Are Curating Ease Over Exhaustion - Page 3
Reclaiming the Narrative
This isn’t for the bougie girls, the ‘all pink’ girls, etc. What’s most misunderstood about this era is that it’s not passive—it’s protective. Perception in regards to social media cannot be reality. Posts aside, you don’t know the story behind lives–and you aren’t supposed to. I once had a man tell me my Instagram gave “rich girl persona.” He wasn’t wrong—but he wasn’t right either. He missed the part where softness was a decision, and the richness is in every smile. The part where I created ease because life already provided enough pressure.
Softness is also being translated into careers. Typically, the average person bends to the will of where their money is coming from, but not for the recent generation-Z applicant. Personally, a past media company offered me a job and minutes later, quickly withdrew based on my advocating for more pay and misjudging how I choose to personally express myself as a Black creative. I was dismissed as someone “only interested in entertainment stories, vain and suggestive.” (God forbid a young Black woman loves herself.)
That one stuck with me. Isn’t our social media for us? What they couldn’t see through my polish was my purpose. They didn’t understand that the new generation is only exercising what ancestors have fought for: freedom, not fitting into the lens of Eurocentric spaces. I learned from this experience that I dodged a bullet, because you should find places that appreciate you for who you are authentically and your work without judgment. That is softness. Allowing yourself to be where you are of value and knowing your worth. What a luxury it is to fully walk in your purpose.
But what did our girl Rih’ say again? Shine bright like a diamond.
This Era Is Intentional
What we’re witnessing isn’t about shrinking. It’s about editing.
Whether it’s going no contact, making your bed, or blasting gospel instead of answering a text from someone who didn’t value you—these choices matter. They are acts of spiritual and emotional grounding.
Even trends like self-care and solo activities, though they may seem obvious, still offer a necessary nudge. Because balance doesn’t happen by accident. Softness has to be chosen, over and over again.
The soft girl reset reminds us that we are allowed to be intentional with our energy, careful with our hearts, and gentle with ourselves. This isn’t about weakness—it’s about walking in ease and alignment, even when the world tells us we have to earn it first.
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