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Sexual tension refers to a strong sense of mutual attraction and unresolved romantic or physical chemistry between two people, but it can be hard to spot when you don’t know the signs. Here are 10 signs you might have an intense sexual attraction to someone.

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1. If you start to feel weird or nervous around that special someone. 

Psychologist Smriti Joshi and relationship expert Julia Kotziamani broke down the science behind sexual tension in a 2024 article for Red Online, and both say there are a few common things that occur when two people feel a strong, intimate connection with one another. 

According to Joshi, sexual tension explodes “when two people interact, mostly in close physical proximity to each other, and they feel a strong sexual desire without it leading to any sexual activity.”

This strong reaction can happen with a colleague at work or a friend that you have had a strong attraction to for a while, but you may feel “weird” or nervous about acting on your desires, which is a vital sign. 

“Especially if you didn’t expect to feel this way about someone or haven’t considered having a relationship with them, yet you feel triggered by them sexually,” Joshi adds. 

2. Your body physically reacts to their presence. 
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What makes the attraction “tense” is the uncertainty surrounding whether it will be reciprocated, often compounded by a lack of familiarity with the other person. While sexual tension can be thrilling and ignite chemistry, it can also become uncomfortable or distracting if left unaddressed. 

Kotziamani notes that uncomfortable tension can impact the body, causing a plethora of physical symptoms like “increased heart rate, blushing, stuttering, sweaty palms, faster breathing, and even an increased blood flow to genital regions.”

These physical responses are involuntary and are often the body’s way of signaling excitement or arousal. You might also feel a warmth spreading through your body or a sudden increase in energy when you’re close to them. These reactions are not just emotional but are also rooted in the physiological effects of attraction.

3. If there’s prolonged or lingering eye contact.
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One of the strongest non-verbal signs of attraction is prolonged eye contact. When you’re sexually drawn to someone, you’ll often find yourself holding their gaze longer than usual. This eye contact can create a sense of intimacy as if you’re communicating without words. It’s more than just a quick glance — you might catch yourself staring at them, and they might do the same. Sometimes, it’s not just about looking at their eyes; it could also involve noticing their lips, facial expressions, or the way their eyes react to you.

4. You both engage in flirty body language.

Attraction is often reflected in body language, and when you’re sexually attracted to someone, you might start to display subtle or overt signs of flirtation. This could include leaning in when they speak, lightly touching their arm or shoulder during conversation, or mirroring their gestures. Your body may naturally open up toward them as if trying to signal that you’re comfortable and interested. You may also find yourself unconsciously mimicking their movements, like crossing your arms when they do or adjusting your posture to match theirs.

 

5. You have a heightened awareness of their presence.

When someone you’re attracted to is around, you become hyper-aware of their presence. Whether they walk into a room, laugh, or move, you notice it all. Your attention naturally shifts toward them, and your mind becomes consumed with thoughts of them. You might catch yourself looking at them frequently or even becoming distracted by the way they move or speak. This heightened awareness extends beyond physical appearance and can make you acutely aware of their voice, scent, and mannerisms — all of which draw you in even more.

6. You laugh or smile around them a lot.
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When you find yourself constantly smiling and laughing in someone’s presence, it often signals a deeper attraction. Their company creates an intoxicating blend of excitement and nervous energy that’s hard to ignore. You might notice your heart racing or butterflies dancing in your stomach as you anticipate each interaction. This natural response—a delicate balance of desire and anticipation—can make even the simplest moments feel charged with electricity, causing your pulse to quicken and your senses to heighten with their every word or gesture.

7. You start to imagine scenarios with them.

Sexual attraction often leads to daydreaming or fantasizing about a more intimate connection. You might catch yourself imagining scenarios in which you and the person are more than just acquaintances or friends, such as kissing, holding hands, or being physically close. These fantasies can be brief, but they highlight a deeper desire to explore what a romantic or sexual relationship with them might look like. Your mind may wander during quiet moments, creating vivid scenarios of closeness or intimacy, reflecting a longing to see that attraction turn into reality.

8. You have sex dreams about them.
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Intimate dreams are a normal part of our subconscious mind, though they can be surprising, especially when they involve people we didn’t expect. While these dreams might be vivid and passionate, they don’t always reflect what we consciously want or think about. Our dreams are shaped by emotions, memories, and hidden thoughts that don’t always relate to our waking desires. However, if someone keeps appearing in your dreams in intimate situations, it could be a sign that your mind is processing a deeper attraction or connection that you haven’t fully recognized yet. These recurring dreams might be hinting at something you should pay attention to in your waking life.

 

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