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After becoming a parent, I was on high alert for the signs and symptoms of postpartum depression. I had heard all about what I should do if I had thoughts about harming myself or my baby, excessive crying, recurring thoughts of death and suicide, and so on. The emotion that I was not prepared to deal with, however, was intense anger.
The anger came on subtly. I suppose part of that is due to the fact that I suppressed a lot of what I was feeling. I felt like I had to do everything because that’s what mothers do. However, somewhere around my daughter’s first birthday, my anger was explosive. I had all of the patience in the world for my daughter, so most of the time, my spouse was the target. I was pissed almost all of the time and sometimes, I felt as though I needed to leave my house for days in order to come down from my anger. This was out of character for me because for one, I love being at home, and two, I’m not usually a very angry person. After having a serious and blunt conversation with my husband, reestablishing expectations, and abandoning my do-the-most mindset, the anger eventually subsided.
I recently learned that my experience is quite common. In fact, it’s so common that it has a name: “postpartum rage” or “mom rage.”
“Rage is when the anger becomes uncontrollable,” Jen Reddish, a registered master therapeutic counselor tells Today’s Parent. “The anger has overpowered you. You tell yourself you’re not going to slam the door, yell at your kid, or tell your spouse to f*ck off, but when it happens, you can’t stop it.”
It is also important to note that mom rage can extend well beyond the postpartum period. Signs and symptoms can include angry outbursts, cursing more than usual, screaming, throwing objects, punching objects, and difficulty keeping your temper in check.
Since you’re reading this article, there’s a good chance that you can probably relate in some way. Click to the next page to find out what causes mom rage in the first place.
