Are you okay with asking a guy to buy you things or, much more significant, cover your bills?
The City Girls says that you should be. While speaking on a new episode of Angela Yee’s Lip Service podcast, the ladies, who rap often about getting what they want and need from men (see songs like “How to Pimp a N—a” for example), offered up some insight on how they successfully do it. Confidence, with a side of boldness, seems to be the key.
“You just gotta ask,” said Yung Miami. “I used to be scared ’cause I ain’t want nobody to feel like I was needy or I ain’t have nothing goin’ or I was just a leech. So I used to be scared. I ain’t gon’ ask for nothin’. Or if they ask, ‘No, I’m okay,’ but really need it. But now, I’m to the point where straight up, I’m grown. Everybody need help.”
Even when she doesn’t actually need the help, like presently due the group’s success, she still believes a man should take care of things for you.
“If I need money I’m a just be like wassup? I want to get my hair done. Or wassup? I saw this bag I want,” she added. “Whatever you want you just gotta ask for it. Wassup? I need my rent paid. You just gotta be straight up. And if they really f–k with you, it ain’t no problem.”
And while it may not be an easy ask, considering on the man you’re dealing with (and pride aside), Yung Miami believes that whomever you’re spending time with should be doing something for you.
“Some men have you intimidated. They’ll have you like, you be scared. But it’s certain ones you don’t care. You feel like you gon’ get whatever you want out of them. You gotta treat every man like that, for real,” she said.
“If you really like somebody, they should already be doing for you anyway. Period. They should be gifting you. They should be paying the bill. Something. And I had to learn that,” she added. “Sometimes n—as just be wanting to f–k you. And then it’s other n—as really that’s into you, they want to see you doing better, they want to see you with nice things. And it’s just some men that just want to f–k you. They see that’s all y’all relationship will ever be. It’s just a f–k thing. So it all just depends on the situation. That’s why I say, you should just get help from whoever you talking to.”
As for JT, she said unlike Yung Miami, she never had an issue with stating what she wanted from a guy, or tricking them. She told a story about encouraging an 18-year-old classmate of hers, when they were just in high school, to buy her a car with his income tax check. He did it.
“When I was younger I was the total opposite,” JT said. “I was so demanding and mean. I swear to God. A boy bought me an Altima coupe with his income tax, I never even let him get in my car. We went to school together and he swore to God he was gonna get a ride in this car. I tricked him into getting me a car, and he couldn’t get a ride in the car.”
When asked if she felt bad about it, she said no.
“Hell nah I ain’t feel bad,” she said. What I feel bad for?”
“He was just really infatuated. I’m telling y’all, ladies, it’s guys out here that will be infatuated with you.”
Yung Miami agreed. She said when asked about what to do if a guy says no that if they’re not into you enough to try and do such things for you, move on.
“Then bye I’m out,” she said. “That’s that, ‘I ain’t giving you s–t,’ like you a little girl. I’m a just give you little s–t. Hell nah, don’t play with me. I don’t like stuff like that.”
Where do you stand on the matter? Are you interested in asking a guy to buy things for you or help pay bills? Or are you more interested in being independent? Share you thoughts below.