Source: Love Is Blind / Netflix
One of the most memorable moments from the entire “Love is Blind” series was the confrontation between Carlton Morton and Diamond Jack. As a refresher, Carlton proposed to Diamond without being fully truthful. He didn’t tell her that he was bisexual and had been in relationships with men before. If you’re working toward spending your life with someone, your sexuality is not something you should withhold.
But he did. And to add insult to injury when Diamond attempted to simply have a conversation with Carlton and ask questions, he erupted. Eventually, he started hurling insults. It was an entire mess and really unfortunate.
Since the show has gone viral, being named the number one show on Netflix, people have expressed their displeasure in the way Carlton handled himself. I guess having hundreds of thousands of people call you out doesn’t feel all that great. And in response, Carlton recently shared this message on Instagram.
https://www.instagram.com/p/B9SY7gsJ0w5/
“I’m really done. Thanks for the press requests, bookings, etc. I am not doing any press/bookings as of today’s radio interview. URBAN MEDIA has been the WORST to me. Black lives matter until it’s an LGBT Black life. Also, so called “celebrity” friends on social media have every opportunity to defend my CHARACTER yet they don’t! I’ve argued for tons of people. Y’all see ANY of those people speaking up for me? I”M DONE.”
I feel for Carlton. It’s clear that he really is hurting and feels abandoned. And it’s a position Black folk who belong to the LGBT community experience more often than they should. That’s not right and it’s not okay.
The problem with Carlton though is that his behavior on “Love is Blind” is indefensible.
Anyone who watched the show could see that Diamond was open to continuing the relationship. But after being lied to, she wanted to have a conversation. And as the recipient of Carlton’s lies, that was her right.
But the way Carlton conducted himself during that conversation was not okay. And as he said later, he counted himself out long before Diamond did. His assumption made him defensive and cruel. If his character is to be defended, his behavior on the show is not evidence of his moral compass.
Diamond didn’t turn up, take her ring off and walk away from him until he started insulting her and the relationship they’d built up until that point. While heterosexual Black men can insult Black women without consequence or reproach, the same can’t be said for Black men in the LGBTQ+ community. And if Carlton steps out of his own feelings of rejection, he’ll likely recognize that he doesn’t have the type of privilege that makes deplorable behavior okay. Someone of good character shouldn’t want to be celebrated and defended even when they act up. They should accept the correction. Check the homophobia and strive to do better.
Homophobia exists. There are a lot of inaccurate assumptions made about bisexual men. And we can argue that most of that is rooted in homophobia. People may not want to examine that part of themselves and admit something like that. Still, Diamond deserved to know who she could have possibly married. She deserved the right to make an informed decision about her life partner. And she deserved the right not to be insulted by a man who claimed to love her.
We can have a conversation about the stigma of bisexuality and undiagnosed homophobia. But the reason people aren’t rushing to defend Carlton is because, with the way he acted, there’s not much to say.
