Source: Aaron J. Thornton / Getty
For a few days now, we’ve been writing and discussing Tamar Braxton’s comments about men and their sexuality. For those who missed it, Braxton claimed that if a man doesn’t touch you in 3, 4, 10 days, then he’s gay and wants penis.
The comments were met with a bit of backlash for several reasons. One, it’s a very reductionist view of men and their sexuality. Of course, men are all about sex. But these notions that they simply cannot go without it are problematic for men and women alike. That’s another discussion for another day.
More importantly, they felt the comments perpetuated the stereotype of the down-low man. And this narrative without a broader discussion about the reasons these men are shamed into hiding is incomplete and some argued even homophobic.
Tamar defended herself saying that she has been a part of the LGBT community, likely as an ally, since she was in the fourth grade. In the series of tweets, she shared that she was going to explain further during an Instagram live session, which she did.
“I really do want to say some sh*t. Because here is the thing. I don’t know if a lot know that I was married before Vince. Ooo breaking news. I was really, really young, right. We lived in Dallas. It was a conversation that was being had and it made me think about what I felt like during that time. You ever reflect back to a relationship that made you feel like you wasn’t sh*t and then where you are now? No, I’m serious.
It was very random because I was very drunk. But I remember wondering what was wrong with me and—he just didn’t see it for me. I know about dudes who cheat on girls with another girl and they don’t f*ck with you like that. They ain’t touching on you or nothing like that. What I am saying is something is wrong. That’s the common denominator. You got a wife. How many days you go without touching her? Ain’t no 10! Something is wrong. Where’s the lie? Either he’s sick. He can’t get it up. He got somebody or he don’t want no kitty kat. That’s all I was saying. And in my case, he didn’t want no kitty cat. He didn’t! He didn’t! So I wasn’t talking about anybody, any gender, any LGBT community. I wasn’t talking about nobody. Look around me. (Tamar is surrounded by gay men in the video.) Let’s just make sense out of things. I was just speaking about a general situation.”
You can listen to Tamar’s comments in the video below.
