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Date Interracially


A few months ago, I wrote a piece about how it is absolutely possible for a Black person to date interracially and still be pro-Black, but we didn’t talk about the flip side of that coin. Maybe it’s time we do because there is an assumption that dating interracially omits the possibility of someone being racist and that’s simply not true. Getting down with the swirl does not preclude anyone from also being a bigot.
Tamera Mowry-Housley gets a fair amount of grief any time she brings up husband Adam Housley on The Real; it happens so often that viewers could practically make a drinking game out of it. That grief comes with some extra side eye whenever she brings him up and mentions race. Last month was no different when Tamera insisted (yet again) that Adam is not racist. Mind you, no one asked her if he was racist, but she brought it up as an example of a point she was making on her talk show. Days later, Adam himself spoke up and Twitter tagged him with receipts from deep in his timeline. Specifically, tweets about the Trayvon Martin case because the Internet never forgets.

Simple reasoning would lead you to conclude that because Adam is with a Black woman, it means that he doesn’t hate Black people. If he doesn’t hate Black people then that automatically means he can’t be racist. It’s just that simple! Case closed. Thanks for reading! Good talk!
Only, it’s not. Physical attraction has very little to do with how you view other races. You know what is pleasing to your eye. With the exception of racial fetishes, which are unspeakably gross, the physical attributes that you find attractive can likely be found in any race. Especially with the advent of plastic surgery. Physical traits that may once have been the domain of one particular race can now be obtained by others. So, if a person comes across someone of a different race that they are attracted to, politics are probably the last thing on their mind.
So while you might sleep with someone of a different race, the values that you grew up with and the stereotypes through which you view others more than likely do not change. This is why racist will see their lovers as the exception and not bother to see others of that race as individuals who deserve to be treated with the same respect and dignity that they expect for themselves. If you’re not the type to have these nuanced conversations about race and privilege with your partner of a different race, then it’s even more likely these inner prejudices will go unchecked.
Adam used to work for FOX News, which is suspect enough on its own; while he wasn’t a political pundit, his colleagues have expressed political views that are very much entwined with a strong racial bias. I would be surprised to learn that he didn’t take on some of that. Whether Adam actually is a bigot is neither here nor there. Tamera’s the only one that really has to wrestle with that. But him being in a relationship with her is not enough to verify that he is not one.
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