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Put Yourself First 1

Business owner assisting customer in nail salon. (via Getty)

It’s an admirable quality to think about the wants and needs of others, but soon enough you’ll find yourself sliding down the slippery slope of burning yourself out and feeling depleted if you never consider your own needs.

It may seem like a foreign concept to you, but there is absolutely nothing wrong with putting yourself first, in fact, it’s an essential form of self-care that everyone should practice on a regular basis. Not sure if it’s time for you to engage in some “me” time? Well, check out these signs and find out if the time has come to put yourself back on your own to-do list.

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Frustrated mother rubbing her temples. (via Getty)

You Always Put The Needs Of Others Before Yourself

No matter what the circumstances and despite you having things of your own you need to do, you always manage to put the needs of others before your own. It’s great to be selfless at times and think of others, but it should never be to your own detriment.

Try taking a few days a week for just yourself. Do something you’ve been wanting to do and constantly put off or better yet, do nothing at all and just relax. Making yourself a priority may be hard to do at first, but once you make it a regular habit you’ll definitely enjoy the benefits.


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Sick woman blowing her nose. (via Getty)

Your Health Is Starting To Suffer

Your lifestyle has a direct impact on your health. If you’re consistently running yourself ragged trying to please everyone in your life, your body is bound to let you know sooner or later.

Chronic pain, frequent colds and general exhaustion are all symptoms of neglecting yourself. If you notice that your health is not what it should be, you have to cut back on the amount you do for everyone else and focus on yourself to regain 100% strength you need.

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Close-up portrait of crying young afro american woman. (via Getty)

You Hide Your True Feelings

You’ve come to a point in your people-pleasing existence that you expertly hide how you really feel out of fear that you’ll hurt someone’s feelings. What you don’t realize is that while you’re prioritizing other’s feelings, who’s thinking of yours?

If you’re tired, frustrated, stressed or depressed, don’t hesitate to let the people in your life know how you feel. Holding in your true emotions is the first step to imploding, which can have very serious effects. Learn to say when enough is enough.

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Black woman with disgusted attitude at waterfront. (via Getty)

You’re Frequently In A Bad Mood

Regardless of what the situation is, you often find yourself in a bad mood and you don’t exactly know why. Well, the answer lies in the fact that you haven’t taken any time to prioritize your own needs and as a result, your mood has become negative.

You don’t want this behavior to continue because being constantly in a sour mood is not good for you or those around you. When you feel a bad mood coming on, take a time-out, take a deep breath and regroup for a moment. Although a small act, you’d be surprise how much it can help.

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African-American woman praying upwards on black background. (via Getty)

The Validation Of Others Means The Most

If people-pleasing is always at the top of your list of concerns, then that is one of the biggest signs that you don’t know how to put yourself first. Helping others is what we all should do, but never at the expense of your own happiness.

There’s obviously a deeper issue here and it requires you to find out why the validation of others is so important to you. Why does how other people view you so crucial to your existence? Once you’re able to answer these questions, you’ll be on the right track to changing your mindset.


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African woman’s hands. (via Getty)

You Don’t Know How To Say “No”

It’s a simple two-letter word, but you’d be surprised how many people have trouble saying it. Saying “no” when you have too many things on your plate or you simply need to take time for yourself does not make you a bad person, despite you thinking it does.

Learn to decline requests for your assistance, especially when you know that need to focus on yourself. Those around you may be shocked at first to hear you finally say “no,” however they may actually grow to respect and appreciate you valuing the need to put yourself first.

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Anxious Black woman resting chin on hands. (via Getty)

You’re Terrified Of Letting Anyone Down

You’ve placed yourself in a position where everyone in your life depends on you and now you’re terrified to let them down by declining to help at times when you know you can’t.

While you’re focused on letting others down, you’re actually letting down yourself because you’re not treating yourself the way you should. Take a significant amount of time to engage in activities and behavior that is solely focused on yourself. If the people around you don’t understand why you’re doing it, you can’t worry about them…because that’s been the problem for too long in the first place.

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African woman receiving spa treatment. (via Getty)

You Can’t Remember When You Did Something For Yourself

If someone were to ask you when is the last time you did something just for yourself, would you have to think about it? If so, then you need some emergency “me” time immediately.

Book a spa appointment, indulge in some retail therapy, relax around the house or go on a vacation. These are all ways to pamper yourself, something that you so desperately need and haven’t done in ages.

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Disappointed young girl posing with folded arms. (via Getty)

You Constantly Feel Guilty When You Can’t Be There For Others

You don’t have to worry about others saddling you with guilt trips because you do it enough on your own. The mere thought of being unable to be there for someone else feels you with so much guilt that you can barely function.

Clearly this is unhealthy behavior and speaks to a larger issue of why you have placed your worthiness into what/how much you do for others. Speaking with a professional may be able to help you get to the root of the issue and guide you to a healthier outlook.

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Woman looking depressed. (via Getty)

You’re Feeling Depressed

Just as your physical health suffers due to neglecting yourself, your mental health is also at risk. Depression is one of the most serious and common health issues effecting people all over the world and it should never be taken lightly.

If you’re feeling depressed, you have to stop thinking about everyone else and focus solely on your own health immediately. Self-care may be a current buzzword, but it’s real, and neglecting it is a gateway to depression. Speaking with a mental health professional can also help in more serious cases.

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