Courting In College: Tips On How To Balance Love While Learning
Dating in college is a slightly different ball game, especially nowadays with the saturation of technology. It seems like people are more connected yet further apart.
Currently I’m a junior in college and maneuvering around in the dating world can be a little stressful. College isn’t like high school. You’re dealing with a different group of people, hopefully a more mature group. A lot of the relationships people have in college end up being their first truly serious “adult” relationship. In many cases it could be the person they end up marrying and spending the rest of their lives with.
Yet at the same time, college (besides getting an education of course) is a time to have fun and live your life. You’re only 18, 19, 20, 21 so why try and settle down so early? You have the rest of your 20s and 30s to find a “soul mate”.
However dating can still be fun, so here are some tips for all you college readers out there…
Try and Date People You Would Never Go For Back Home
Going away to college is usually most people’s first experiences with dealing with different types of people. It can be a little overwhelming at first; interacting with people you would usually never cross paths with. But college is a little taste of what the real world is like. You won’t always be around people who share your same interests or come from your background.
Try dating outside of your race or try dating that computer “nerd” or that cute hipster chick.
In high school people felt bogged down to only date within their social class “clique”. Ideas like this can keep you from meeting great people and possibly the love of your life or at least your love of right now.
Don’t Date People Within Your Major or Board of Study
Besides the fact that they will be your competition for jobs once you graduate, like the first tip, you want to date someone who can give you a different perspective on life.
Sure you would think it would be cute doing homework and studying together, but you don’t want to lose your identity within a relationship.
One thing that scared me during one of my earlier relationships in college was that my boyfriend at the time wanted to switch his major to Journalism (which is my major). He was a great writer, but I was afraid he wanted to switch for the wrong reasons. Granted he never ended up changing his major.
So part two of this tip, if your boo thang wants to switch to your major, talk it over with them. Make sure they’re doing it for the right reasons. Most likely they’re just confused and probably want to spend more time with you.
Plus dating another journalist would be hectic; we would never have time for each other.
Give Each Other Space and Alone Time
When living on campus, you will probably spend a lot of your down time with your significant other. You’re basically living together, and like any couples who live together it can be quite stressful. The great thing about college is that if you and your significant other get in argument all you have to do is go back to your dorm room to chill out.
Try and Date People Who Live Off Campus
My first two years of college I was involved with someone who didn’t attend my school. We met before I went away. Though there are pros and cons of a distance relationship, it actually wasn’t all that bad.
You get to be your own person and focus more on your grades if your boo isn’t always there. Then you have the weekends to hang out and do all the cute stuff couples usually do. Plus it gives you time to miss them. They say distance makes the heart grow fonder and sometimes it really does.
Go On Actual Dates Off Campus
I know this is hard one since a lot of people in college (me included) are trying to balance school work, a job, and a social life and money is usually pretty tight. But instead of spending half your paycheck on cheap beer and vodka (Don’t act like you don’t) try and go on cute romantic dates with your boyfriend/girlfriend every once in awhile.
A date to the dining hall or Starbucks on campus all the time isn’t cute. You have to shake up the consistency of a college relationship. Though there’s nothing wrong with staying in and watching Netflix or playing video games during your free time.
Don’t forget about your friends!
This is a major dating rule no matter how old you are and if you’re in college or not. I lost many friends because they decided to drop me once they fell in love.
College is all about balancing your time between work, school, and a social life. Don’t let your relationship get in the away of your friendships. Just like your college relationship could lead to a more serious relationship down the road, your friends in college usually go on to being the friends you’ll have around for the long run. So ladies don’t let a man get between you and your friends.
A really simple word of advice, but you’ll be surprised how many couples aren’t having fun in their relationship.
You’re young and in love. This is when relationships are supposed to be passionate, fun, and spontaneous. Sure thinking about marriage, moving in with someone, or having children can be in the back of your mind. But spend your college years not only trying to get an education and preparing yourself for a career…have fun. You’ll have the rest of your life to deal with the nonsense that is an “adult relationship”.