Phrases You Say When You’re In A Bad Relationship
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Being in a bad relationship is a bit like having an illness; you can try to deny it all you want, but the symptoms will start popping up against your will. When you’re unhappy with your partner that changes the way your brain works, and even the chemistry of your body. It’s just like when you’re extremely happy with somebody; you notice changes happening in your mind and body—you probably feel more relaxed and more positive. The state of your relationship affects the way you behave, what you say and even what you think. You can try to fool yourself all you want, but when you’re not in the right relationship, the signs will find a way to sneak out and all your friends can see and hear it. On that note, here are phrases you’ll hear yourself say when you’re in a bad relationship.
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Every relationship has its problems
Sure, but only couples who are facing an insurmountable and unreasonable amount of problems rely on the saying, “Every relationship has its problems.” No couple is perfect, but healthy couples’ problems are manageable enough that they aren’t really on their minds when they’re out having drinks with friends, and they wouldn’t say this sentence.
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Relationships are hard work
Are you ready to have your mind blown? Relationships don’t have to be hard work! This dangerous belief is what keeps plenty of people in the wrong relationship because they think it’s as good as it gets. But you can actually be in a relationship that not only is easy, but also has a way of making every part of life feel easier.
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It could be worse
That’s the standard you’re basing your life partner on? That it could be worse? What you should be aiming for is a relationship that you couldn’t possibly imagine being any better.
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Life isn’t a fairytale
No, it isn’t, but when you’re in the right relationship, life does feel a little magical. When you’re in the wrong relationship and are afraid to be alone, you have to reject the idea that you could, actually, wake up really happy and excited every day to be with your partner. In fact, your life is a drama.
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I need to start being realistic
Ah yes, a word everyone wants to be attached to the whimsical, romantic concept of love: “realistic.” Other words you may use include practical, mature, levelheaded. WRONG! Sure, you should be realistic, but if that’s your only requirement for choosing a partner, then you could date just about anybody who is financially and mentally stable. You need more reasons to choose the one you spend your life with.
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Relationships are about sacrifice
To say relationships are about sacrifice is like saying “The Hunger Games” is about teen love—that’s a tiny part of it. Of course, you’ll have to make a few sacrifices in a relationship, but if you find yourself saying relationships are about sacrifice, then you’ve made too many. In fact, you’ve probably lost yourself.
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Not everything is about sex
It certainly isn’t! But people tend to start saying this when nothing is about sex in their relationship anymore, and they hardly even touch their partner.
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We’re separate but together; it’s healthy!
Hmmm. Questionable. You shouldn’t be attached at the hip as a couple, but you should feel that you are building a life together, rather than building your own separate lives and just meeting up sometimes.
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My boyfriend doesn’t have to be my friend; I have friends for that
And what wonderful friends they are, but your romantic partner should also be your friend. If your partner isn’t your friend, then this relationship doesn’t have legs.
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Everyone changes when they find the one
They may change in the sense that they become calmer, happier, more peaceful and more positive. But they shouldn’t change in the sense that they used to want children more than anything in the world and now have themselves convinced that they don’t…because their partner doesn’t.
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We don’t have to talk every day
You don’t have to—you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do! But you should want to talk to your partner every day. You should want to talk to your partner several times a day!
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We have a lot in common! We both like (insert generic activity here)
A lot of people like tennis and frozen yogurt. If you cannot list values and beliefs you have in common, you got nothing. Well, except a lot of tennis matches in your future.
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Fighting only makes you stronger
Fighting occasionally and communicating through it makes you stronger. Being a couple that just yells every day, doesn’t have healthy ways of resolving conflicts, and rarely experiences peace are weak and about to dissolve.
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Nobody’s as happy as they seem
I’m about to blow your mind: some couples are as happy as they seem. In fact, they’re even happier! They just tone it down when they’re in public because if they showed their full happiness, they’d be arrested for indecent exposure.
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Couples don’t need to tell each other everything
No, they don’t need to. But, once again, it’s not about if you have to do something but rather about the fact that you should want to. When you’re with the right person, you feel safe sharing everything with them, and you value their input.
