Some people really show their true colors when you break up with them, and those colors can be dark, stormy and hideous. It’s a beautiful thing, really, because they save you months of wondering if you made the right decision, if you could have eventually been happy together and if you just let a great guy go. Based on the way some men act when you break up with them, you get the answers to all of those questions within a day or two, and those answers prove you definitely made the right decision, you would have been miserable with this person, and you were just fortunate enough to kick a terrible guy out of your life. Here are things men do after a breakup that confirm your decision to end things.
Get up and leave/hang up
Some guys refuse to acknowledge the conversation. Instead, they get up and leave the coffee shop table and walk out. If you’re on the phone, they just hang up. That shows a deep level of immaturity—they can’t even have a conversation and leave things on good terms.
Try to beat you to the punch
Here’s another thing very immature men will do: try to beat you to the punch! The moment they sense this is a breakup conversation, they interrupt you and blurt out, “I think we should break up! I said it first!”
Accuse you of cheating
Even though they know you’re not the cheating type, some men just have to put a dark cloud over a breakup that didn’t need to be there and accuse you of cheating during the relationship.
Date someone else immediately
Sure, that doesn’t scream of severe insecurity, a desperate need to overcompensate, the inability to be alone and a huge ego.
Ask about your friend
“Now that we’re over, do you think I could get your friend’s number? I kind of always felt like she was into me.”
Ask for his gifts back
Gifts given within a relationship aren’t conditional—they don’t go away just because the relationship ends. But some guys (the petty ones) don’t abide by this rule and will demand you give them their gifts back.
Dump your gifts on your lawn
Some men also, as a form of spitting in your face, will dump all of the gifts you thoughtfully picked out for them, on your lawn. They may jump on them, break them or burn them if they’re feeling especially douchey.
The ego on some guys is so enormous it’s amazing they don’t need a second bedroom for it. Some guys, after you dump them, will seek legal “justice” against you, accusing you of having stolen some idea of theirs, or simply causing emotional trauma.
Confess that they wanted to cheat
Well isn’t that nice. You could have ended things on good terms, but instead, this guy just wants to let you know that he was having disrespectful thoughts the entire relationship. So ha. (Cool, bro).
Criticize something petty
Like the clothes you wear, the way you cut your food, your laugh…Some men never grew up past the seventh grade and just need to get in the last, petty little word.
Tell you that you were bad in bed
The real slime of the earth will try to hit you where it hurts and take what were intimate, special times together and add a vile aura to them.
If one guy is surprisingly pleasant and polite when you end things, don’t be surprised to hear that he starts slandering your reputation all over town after. Some men can be as nasty as high school mean girls.
Post a rant about you on Facebook
He may tag you in it, and he may not—opting instead to refer to you as “The soul-sucking demon” or something creative like that. Either way, some men take to social media to rant on about you, like some angsty teenager.
Text you a string of nasty messages
Many men don’t know how to express themselves in person, or at least they don’t have the balls to, so instead, they’ll pick up their phones and have a text message binge. You may wake up to twenty consecutive texts from the ex, all telling you how awful you are and how he never loved you.
Text you a string of sad, desperate messages
The twenty nasty texts might be followed by twenty sad, needy, apologetic texts. The guy who doesn’t know how to express himself usually teeter-totters between yelling at you, and begging for your forgiveness.
Go on a bender
A few days after breaking up with a guy, you may open your local newspaper to read a headline about a drunk man who crashed his car into a department store to try on, what he told police, were his “ex’s favorite pajamas.” Yikes.
Try to recruit your family’s sympathy
Over family dinner your mother may bring up the fact that your ex called recently, trying to explain to her all of the reasons he is perfect for you and what a huge mistake you made breaking up with him. He was hoping your mother would talk some sense into you.
If you start running into your ex at your yoga studio, at your favorite Farmer’s market, and at your local dog park, he’s following you! Normal exes go out of their way to avoid your regular hangouts.
Try to message you on Tinder
I’m not quite sure what their thought process is here—maybe that you’ll think it’s fate that Tinder matched the two of you, so you should get back together?
Take out a restraining order
The guys who are truly obsessed with you might project that onto you, and take out a restraining order against you. Of course, they’ll have no grounds for it and it won’t go through.