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The entire wedding industry is becoming more casual. Some people host their weddings on houses found on AirBnb, having both the ceremony, reception and honeymoon there. Some couples throw keggers in picturesque barns and get married in designer dresses with cowgirl boots. With the sense of formality leaving this otherwise very grandiose event, it can be hard, as a guest, to know what to do. If your wedding invitation arrived via email, it seems a bit much to rent your partner a tuxedo for the event. But that may still be called for. Then, of course, there are age-old traditions that nobody ever understood, and that are all the more confusing now that times are changing. Here are 15 wedding guest rules that nobody understands.
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Image Source: Shutterstock

Can you always bring a plus one?

Unless your invitation explicitly says you can bring a plus one then no, you cannot. Even if the wedding is quite casual, the couple purchased food and beverage with guest list in mind. If everybody brought a plus one, they’d run out of food and beverage.

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If you break up with your plus one…

What happens if you were invited with a plus one, but you’ve since broken up with that plus one? Well, the nice thing to do is to let the bride and groom know so that they can invite a friend or family member who they didn’t previously have room for.

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How serious is this “Black tie” thing?

If they put it on the invitation, then they are serious about it. Whatever the wardrobe note is, take it because otherwise, you’ll be the weirdo in the corduroy suit at the black tie wedding in their photos.
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Do you have to stick to your assigned seat?

At least through the meal, yes. Once the cake has been served, and the dancing has begun, you can do some seat hopping. But know that the couple chose those seats very carefully.
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Image Source: Shutterstock

What about Instagram photos?

Social media is a tricky thing at weddings. A good rule, however, is not to post anything until at least a couple of days after the wedding–this gives the couple a chance to make the first posts.
Corbis Images

Corbis Images

Do you have to fill out the RSVP?

Yes, you do. This is the one time you cannot text, email or call to let someone know you’re coming. They’ve invited hundreds of people, and count on those little RSVP cards to keep things in order.
Corbis

Corbis

How serious is the registry?

The registry is in place to make your life easier. If you cannot afford something on the registry, your best bet is to purchase the couple a gift card to the store where they are registered.
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How much should the gift cost?

The general rule is that the price you spend on the gift should offset your seat at the wedding. So, if you guess the couple spend about $70 per plate (that includes all the booze you can drink and dessert) your gift should be at least $70. If you bring a plus one, you’re looking at a $140 gift.
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Can anybody give a speech?

If someone stands up and says, “Now we’re welcoming speeches” then probably anyone can give one. However, if someone–like the maid of honor–stands up and says, “Now the bride’s father would like to give a speech” and she continues to call up speech-givers, they probably only have a set amount of time for speeches.
Happily engaged black couple

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Do you get an engagement gift?

You don’t have to, but it’s certainly not rude to do so. This can be something small, like a photo frame with the couple’s names engraved into it.
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How drunk can you get though?

Read the room for this one. If the couple purchased an open bar, the probably hope that you go for it. If they just have servers passing out beer and wine upon request, this may be a 3-drink event.
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What if it’s a dry wedding?

If you go to a dry wedding, you should not wander off to the bar inside of the hotel or restaurant to purchase drinks. If you really want to drink, pregame in the hotel room.
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Do you have to catch the bouquet?

No. But if you don’t want to, then remove yourself from the scene. Standing by while the bride throws the groom, but making no effort to catch it, can make you look like a poor sport.
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Do you have to attend the ceremony?

If you were invited, then yes. Not everybody gets invited to the ceremony so being invited is an honor not to be taken lightly. Even if it’s not always, well, fun.
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Shutterstock

What if you were put in the B Squad?

You may realize, based on your wedding invitation that came in three weeks before the wedding, that you’re the B Squad. That means you got invited because somebody else couldn’t make it. Don’t take it personally. You have no idea how large this couple’s network of family and friends are. You’re probably still as close as you thought you were.