With statistics like the ones we’ve been bombarded with lately regarding black women and relationships, we’re learning that in some instances (only some) a closed mouth may not get a man. What exactly does that mean?
Well, nowadays it’s not unheard of for a woman to show a man’s she’s interested (Please note, showing a man you’re interested and pursuing a man are NOT the same thing). If you have a crush on a guy, merely having a crush would be enough if you didn’t want a man or were still in middle school and too young to date; but if you are interested, consensual adults, and the both of you are single, why not let him know that you’re interested? Just because he hasn’t approached you, doesn’t mean he hasn’t been checking you out.
So how does a lady subtly show a man she’s interested? Take notes.
Give Him Eye Contact
If every time he passes you shyly turn your head or lower your eyes, how is he to know you’re interested? Eye contact is one of the most important forms of nonverbal communication. While staring isn’t suggested, giving him quick eye contact at least acknowledges that you notice him.
Smile
When you smile at him, don’t give him a quick (and noticeably fake) smile. Instead, give him a genuine heartfelt smile (sans showing all teeth). Smiling is another form of nonverbal communication that goes hand in hand with eye contact. You really can’t have one without the other if you’re attempting to show interest in someone.
Open Your Mouth and Speak
You may be thinking that this is self-explanatory, but so many times we wait for a crush to speak or conveniently turn shy when he approaches. But next time you see him, instead of only giving nonverbal signs, speak to him. And if you’re really feeling bold, follow up with a quick question (how was/is your day?, do you come here often? etc.) Who knows where one simple question could lead?
Compliment Him
Who doesn’t love a compliment? This is probably one of the best ways to show interest. If you like the way he looks in a particular color, tell him. If he smells good, let him know. Women aren’t the only ones who like to be showered with compliments.
Get the 411 From Him
Most people love to talk about themselves. Yes, even men. Ask your crush questions about him. Find out what he likes, doesn’t like, where he’s from, etc. Of course asking too many questions stand the risk of becoming annoying; but asking him a few things about himself shows that you’re interested in getting to know him.
Touch Him
Touching him should of course be done at the appropriate time. If you’re talking or laughing at one of his jokes, a very subtle touch on the arm or shoulder is appropriate and creates a bit of chemistry. While it may seem a bit awkward at first, he will definitely appreciate the touch, even if it’s subtle.
Don’t Be Scared…Ask Him Out
To some women asking a man out on a date is still somewhat taboo. With this being said, you don’t necessarily have to bluntly ask him out on an official date. Instead ask him to go see a movie that the both of you have talked about. Or when it’s appropriate ask him to go grab some food, not ‘let’s go out to dinner’. Find a common place or interest that you both have and ask if he’d like to accompany you. This way you can get to know each other better with no commitments of an official date.
Have you ever or would you ever approach a man?
