Sis, What’s Your Name Again? Play It Cool When You Forget

It’s a situation we’ve all found ourselves in: you meet someone through a friend, then run into them again at an event, but their name completely escapes you. That awkward wave of panic starts to rise as you draw a total blank. So, how do you politely ask for their name without making things even more uncomfortable? 

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During a recent interview with Time writer Angela Haupt published May 21, etiquette expert Thomas Farley explained that it’s perfectly normal to forget someone’s name—so don’t let embarrassment consume you. Give yourself some grace. 

“When we’re meeting someone, there are so many things going through our minds,” Farley told Haupt. “We’re trying to remember, ‘Have I met this person before? Who do they remind me of? Oh, I love that necklace they’re wearing. That’s a great haircut. I wonder where she got that purse.’ At the moment when someone is giving us their name, we’re flooded with so many other things we’re thinking about and processing at the same time.”

Remember where you met them.

With that in mind, try to gain some more context as to where you met the person first, to see if you can remember their name. Maybe you met at a friend’s wedding, a housewarming party, or a work event—get them to confirm. However, if you’re still drawing a blank, politely ask for them to state their name again. You can say something like, “I know we met at the such-and-such conference—I’m just blanking on your name at the moment,” Farley shared. Don’t be afraid to re-introduce yourself as well, because they may have forgotten your name, too. 

Here’s one thing you should avoid, according to the etiquette expert. Don’t just stand there staring blankly if someone you’ve met before approaches you and you can’t remember their name. This gives off the impression that “You’re not only name-blanking them but also face-blanking them,” Farley explained, which can make things uncomfortable and downright awkward fast. 

“That’s telling them, ‘You were so unmemorable, I don’t even remember your face. I don’t remember a thing about you.’”

Use some humor.

Another great way to handle forgetting someone’s name is with a bit of humor. Try something playful like, “I want to say your name is… Archibald? No? Alright, help me out.” Delivered with a smile, it keeps the moment light and disarming.

According to communication expert Jeff Callahan, this approach actually shows confidence. As he told Haupt, it signals that you’re comfortable enough to laugh at yourself—and that turns an awkward moment into a chance for genuine connection.

Do you find some of these etiquette tips useful? Tell us in the comments section.

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