States Where Cheating Thrives — And Yours Might Be on the List

Cheating sucks—full stop. And there’s bad news if you’re a hopeless romantic living in the United States. According to a 2024 study by Instacams obtained by the New York Post, your chances of being cheated on may depend heavily on where you live in the U.S. The study analyzed data from 80 popular dating platforms—including Tinder, Bumble, BLK, and the notorious Ashley Madison—to pinpoint where infidelity is most common and who’s engaging in it.

One of the most striking takeaways? Married individuals are increasingly using dating apps as a discreet way to seek out affairs behind their partner’s back. Ashley Madison, a platform specifically marketed to people looking to have an affair, stood out in the research for its high volume of married users.

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Surprisingly, Colorado topped the list as the state with the most cheating activity. The Centennial State logged 424 Ashley Madison searches per 100,000 residents, making it the state with the highest number of married individuals actively seeking extramarital connections. Despite its controversial reputation, Ashley Madison ranked as the second-most searched dating app in Colorado.

Not far behind, North Dakota came in second with 362 searches per 100,000 residents, highlighting how cheaters in The Peace Garden state weren’t keeping the peace in their relationships with their sneaky behavior. New Hampshire came in third place with 357. These states appear to be quiet hotspots for infidelity, at least online.

Notably, New York, while ranked 10th overall, still had 331 Ashley Madison searches per 100,000 people. Connecticut edged slightly ahead with 335 monthly searches, showing that even more traditional or low-key states are not exempt from the trend, according to Instacams’ findings.

Why do people cheat?

While cheating is a painful reality, the study highlights how digital platforms are making it easier than ever to engage in secret relationships, no matter where you live. But there’s a bigger question hiding behind Instacams’ latest study: Why do people cheat?

It’s not an easy answer. People cheat on their partners for a wide range of reasons, and while every case is unique, research has identified common psychological and emotional motivations behind infidelity. A 2020 study published on the motivations and consequences of cheating gave some insight into why individuals have affairs, particularly in the context of 495 U.S. undergraduates and internet-based participants. The study found two primary categories of cheating motivations: dyadic and non-dyadic.

Dyadic motivations stem from issues within the primary relationship, such as anger toward a partner, emotional disconnection, or a lack of love. Participants who reported these motivations were more likely to engage in longer affairs, go on more public dates with their affair partners, and were more likely to end their primary relationships. According to the study, these complex cases show how cheating could be a reaction to unmet emotional or relational needs, and often signal deeper relationship dissatisfaction.

On the other hand, non-dyadic or situational motivations—such as feeling stressed, being under the influence of alcohol, or succumbing to a moment of weakness—tended to result in shorter, less satisfying affairs. People motivated by these factors also reported lower rates of confessing to their partners and fewer breakups. In other words, these affairs were more impulsive and less emotionally significant, but still carried consequences.

Either way, cheating stinks, and no one wants to be on the receiving end. So, beware if you live in one of the aforementioned states.

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