Are You The Type of Black Girl That White Guys Like?

414 Comments
February 21, 2014 ‐ By Ezinne Ukoha
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For the longest time, I have been told that I am the “type of black girl” that white guys would be falling over themselves to date. I would always get defensive and force them to explain how they came to this conclusion. Apparently the way I carried myself and the way I spoke convinced them that I would attract mostly white guys. I wasn’t sure how to feel about that but it got me thinking about what black girls imagine when they consider dating a white guy.

I have dated a few of them myself, and based on my experience, I can say that it’s not that much different from dating guys within my own race but there are a few exceptions. White guys tend to be a lot more adventurous and spontaneous. This can translate into being involved in activities that won’t work well with weaves or an expensive blowout. I have never been that girl who spent loads of money and half a day at the salon. I am a low maintenance kind of gal so I never had a problem taking a hike and ending up at a watering hole. I somehow always ended up with white guys who loved my hair and it didn’t matter if they were younger or older. They found my natural tresses engaging and refreshing, and even though I was flattered, I always made it a point to explain that extensions were not necessarily a tacky endeavor, as long as the recipient knows how to rock it!

Another reason why my friends were adamant that I was “white guy” material rests on my physique. I have always been quite slender and there is this unspoken “fact” that white guys are more turned on by girls who carry a more athletic build. It’s true that based on the ones I dated, being in shape was a major feat, but they also appreciate a “little junk in the trunk” too – and I think that mentality goes across the board.

I will admit that being African seems quite appealing to guys of other races, especially white men. My name alone would garner a level of attention and then the avalanche of questions regarding my background. It seemed the more I divulged the more heightened the interest became.  I started to feel a sense of guilt that my heritage was what set me apart from the rest of the pack. It was a huge advantage that I grew up in my country because my demeanor reflects the fact that I am not your “typical” Black girl. And when I would ask for a more detailed explanation, the stereotypes start filtering in; I am soft-spoken instead of loud-mouthed, I enjoy working out and it shows, I have a college degree, and I am not a “baby mama.”

Yes, all those things are true, but those qualities also apply to legions of black girls, and I always endeavor to point that out. I have never been the girl who limited the offerings on the menu when it comes to dating. I have always been an equal opportunity scout and my pledge was and still is to find the guy who respects and loves me just the way I am. Historically, yes, I do tend to attract white guys more and that could be something inherently in me that orchestrates that but I try to never lose sight of who I am and I certainly don’t allow guys of other races to express their adulation at the expense of my sistahs. Dating outside your race can pose a variety of issues that can either break or make your relationship, but as long as both parties are in it for the right reasons, it can be an adventurously fulfilling ride.

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  • Destiny Campbell

    Another African girl who is obsessed with white guys trying to ‘brag’ about how her supposedly being more educated and ‘soft’ spoken and thinner than the average black American girl is scoring her attention from the great white male species. Give me a break.

  • Steve

    There are a lot of African baby mamas as well. People just don’t see it, apparently.

    I’m a white guy married to a Kenyan woman, and sadly it tends to hold true that white men flock to African women. I can’t speak for all white men but there are 2 reasons this usually happens:

    1) Many African women seem to love white men and flock to us (I see it regularly)

    2) of course, the idiotic stereotypes seem to make white men become intimidated by African American women.

    Me personally, I liked black women from all walks of life. It just so happened that I fell in love with and married an African woman. And I’m not sure why you’re attacking the author for the stereotypes. People seem to be missing the part where she’s asking for explanations, and those were the reasons given to her. She did not make those comments herself.

    I do agree though, that those stereotypes are offensive and we really need to get away from them.

  • Adaeze

    You sound like you need mental help.

  • jase

    This article was odd in the sense that it was incomplete. You made reference to where you’re from but never stated where exactly. So much for that college degree.

    • Adaeze

      Why does she have to be specific? So you can stalk her further?

  • atheepyonga

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  • MultiNatChick

    People act sooooooo offended by articles like this, but these things need to be said and the Black community needs to wake up.

    Yes, Black women are stereotyped as loud, complaining, rude, baby mama, etc. Some of these labels are true for a lot of them and others are placed upon us by Black men. I have Black male friends that accuse me of complaining or whining every time that I disagree on anything but they can cry about how some rap song was not this way or that way for ages and I just nod and allow them to do so. Really, I’m thinking about cutting some of them off as friends.

    Many Black men are not cultured and they treat women that are cultured horribly. Yes, I date outside of the Black race, but it is not about looks or race, it is about culture and compatibility.

    I like poetry, I like classical music, I like art, I like reading novels and science books. These things are not the norm in the Black community and if I waited for my Black Prince Charming to arrive that liked these things, I would be waiting my entire life. Yes, there are Black men that like these things, but they are few and far between. Even when I was in music school, the Black guys only listened to classical music while they were in class but could not wait to get out so that they could listen to some R&B or rap and they barely passed their classical music requirements or they were gay.

    Some Black men would pretend to like classical music until they could no longer pretend and slipped and made a comment like ‘do you like Black people music?’ smh

    So really, if I ever wanted the chance to get married without waiting until I’m 50 years old, I HAD to start dating other races. No, I am not racist, it is not about looks, it is not about abandoning my culture, and although Black men have treated me poorly, it is not necessarily about that. My interests just happen to align with people outside of the typical Black community…

    And if that makes me racist, then I will be one happily married racist with a nice blended family of people that have varied interests outside of sports, rap music, and R&B.

    • Adaeze

      Yaaaayyy, nicely written and I agree wholeheartedly.

  • Suburban Princess Dior

    Honestly from my personal experience non black men have treated me better. I’m only 21 but I’ve dated men much older

  • Nikki

    I think what she’s trying to say is that she’s more like the stereotype of a “white girl” than a “black girl”. I mean, if a black girls acts “white” (if that’s even a real thing) then maybe a white guy will idk like her more because she doesn’t fit the stereotype of a “black girl”. Idk, that’s just what I thought she meant basically. I get why you guys are offended about the baby mama and degree things though. That hit me a little hard too considering my mom had me when she was 19 and didn’t get to go back to college until I was all grown up and she’s morning like the sterotypical black girl.

  • Wendy Jeanlouis

    I am soft spoken but very opinionated. I always end up with white guys hitting on me. Do t know why at all and still trying up figure it out myself. Don’t think soft spoken is much of the cause. It called attraction a man sees what he likes and goes after it is all. Actually men from all backgrounds Indian, middle eastern, Asian etc. I guess it depends ok the guy. Now stp making a spectacle or mystery to something as simple as attraction and get over it. Interracial interest have always been there nothing new

  • Albert8184

    I’ve dated women of all races and many nationalities. Wound up marrying a girl in my own ethnicity… but it didn’t have to be that way for me. A man who isn’t prepared to accept the rejection of his family for the love of his life shouldn’t get into something that might lead to heartbreak or worse. I wasn’t afraid to tell my family to MYOB – but that might no work for everyone. Thank goodness times are changing.

  • lalalano

    isnt thisjust reinforcing stereotypes? and making see as if its possitve to impress specifically white guys? You are killing us here…

  • 2shilligs

    I find most black women to be stunningly beautiful,spirited and something else that i can only describe us “intrinsically maternalistic”. Just awesome. Ultimately it comes down do individual character and values,however,for long term realtionships. Myself i’m White and i only have eyes for black ladies. They are beautiful.

  • FAGGOTY.FAGGOT.BOLLOCK

    im a white(ish) dude, looking for his black girl. . . i live in sheffield (england) and would love to hear from ”said girl” if she is closeby (or even worldwide) providing she wants to make a go of things,. . . .im pretty reasonable, and have pics. . . . by the way, ignore the rather faggoty username

  • Emma Hallows

    You are all complaining about how stereotypical this article is yet the LOADS of you are stereotyping and generalising yourself. “most black women do this” ” most black women do that” You are one person, you dont know what most black women are doing. Please stop judging and stop speaking for everyone. What you see the few in your area or country are doing do doesnt count. This is African American viewpoints and stereotypes, African women dont have all these issues you guys are talking about, so leave them out of it.

  • neededtosaysumthin

    Just Wow!!! I don’t even have to explain why this is offensive. Don’t believe the hype, this type of ignorance isn’t bliss! Because saying this kind of bullshit to the wrong person will get your butt kicked #justsayin

  • Surprised

    What was the point of this article, i thought i was going to learn her experience and maybe read about how she told these men that how a person turns out depends on how that person was raised, their own personality and or where. It really has little to do with their ethnicity. She pretends to care, but its so obvious she’s taking it all in and was just boasting and make all the compliments she received known. The article should be titled “The awesome compliments i received from white men”. I’m African and i get these comments all the time, but people i know (relatives and what not) who are from the same area, not just country are loud mouthed. It really depends on the persons mindset really. And there are millions that are considered “loud mouthed” with degrees and athletic bodies and vise-versa. I can go on and on but I’ve already let this get to me lol and already written enough. I can understand how this can offend some people.

  • SerenityNow

    Great read. I can identify with this article, except I’m from the Caribbean.

  • Ace

    I think this is the most arrogant, stereotypical article I have ever read. I thought she was going to talk about similar taste and interest. Like music, sports, politics. Instead she said how she was “different” from the stereotypical black woman. Like SO MANY other black women. Has she never heard of the phrase Oreo. Black women that act white. And there are black women who aren’t Oreos that don’t even fit into the “ghetto” stereotype. She is really ignorant and delusional. She needs to get off her high horse. She is probably one of those people that need to validate themselves by putting others down. So sad.

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  • Lena

    and this is just another example of how the master’s tools will never dismantle the masters house , we cannot continue to perpetuate this type of thought

  • Lena

    zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz im sleep , and the writer needs to go take a nap as well

  • Rochelle

    If I could up you a thousand times I would. Much truth in your post.

  • YoungAfrique

    What a stupid thing to write about,you got some issues if you think a white guy like you is something to be pounding your chest about.We come here to support this ,so please spare us with such bullshit..smfh!

  • C. BrownOcean

    This is ridiculous

  • Charisma

    I’m the opposite of just about everything she mentioned and I’ve date many white guys before marrying my husband (who is also white).

  • xxdiscoxxheaven

    SMH that this article was ever written….

  • stephy

    Come on madame, I’m so sick of this tired ole white men like this and black women do that. The more you post this gar bage, the more we feed into this stigma of nonsense. I know white guys that love baby mommas. Yes there is a certain type for everyone, buy being one voice for all redundantly is just fueling more fire to the ignorance.

  • handsomerandyblackcowboybrad

    I’m the sort of handsome,randy older black lad buxom blonde babes LOVE!!!!!!!

  • JaNelle Lee

    well first its biased. Not all white guys are the same. Again, she tends to date the same ones, so she isn’t really seeing a change. lol

  • Wut Defock

    Ask Robert De Niro!!

  • Phillyscorp

    Why in God’s name is this article posted to your site? It is the most ignorant thing that I’ve read in a while and it’s written by a black person. African=black if you didn’t know that. Shame. Shame. Shame. I have a question though…is an unwed white woman with a child called single mother and a black American woman called a babies mama? Is that how it works? Inquiring minds want to know. The author needs to get a clue. Any white man worth my time isn’t dating me because I’m the “right” kind of black woman but because he sees something beyond color and stereotypes.

    • Adaeze

      Africans and African Americans are completely different. Keep trying to act as if we are one – see how that works out for you. :-)

  • iccheap

    The positive side of insubstantial articles like this are the comments that are generated. Thanks to all for a window into how you perceive this subject matter and other issues tangential to it.

  • nikki

    Had some of you read the entire article. You would have seen where she stated that the qualities she poses, “legions of black girls poses those same qualities” AND you would have alsoseen where she said she does not let guys of other races express their adulation at the expense of her sistahs.

    It is said if you want to hide something from black people put it in a book…maybe book needs to be changed to “Article”. SMH

  • CKB

    My only thought on this is, people attract people who are into the same things they are into.
    If this article was written by a white woman from another country saying pretty much the same thing , I don’t think people would be so upset.
    I understand the article and I don’t think it’s ignorant at all. It is this woman’s experience. No one can say she is wrong cause it’s her life. To get on her about it is just plain wrong.

    Like I said I get. It’s like I’ve always said not all Black people come from the same place and have the same experiences in life.

  • JANE THOMAS

    i have never been to USA but i must say this,i pick up stereotyping from the standup comedies i have watched and although its meant to be funny, it actually outlines the mentality most people have about each race/ethnic group. Unless African Americans and Americans in general stop glorify stereotyping it will never end and will be passed on from generation to generation. i also know due to racism blacks have limited opportunities however if you would concentrate on educating yourselves and maybe just maybe think of relocating from USA to other continets then your world will be opened up to more important world calamities.life is larger and bigger than articles as these and women who take time to abuse each other its such a shame!!!!!for example take time to pray for Syrian women and children suffering due to the civil war in their country,women and children in Congo,North Korea…should i continue???

  • Jcj

    I don’t have natural hair,it’s relaxed but long and mine. I’m peanut butter colored and not slender and have a butt. My mothers mixed which depending on your perception transcends…. White men talk to me.

  • Your Mom

    The problem isn’t black women. It’s the select few African American women with low standards, low self worth, and zero self respect that make any woman of color look like damn fools. Not all black people are African American.

    All races have their stereotypes and issues and bad seeds. Totally not denying that. But to be perfectly honest as a West Indian woman, any black person born in another country makes it a point to differentiate themselves from African Americans – especially the women.

    I don’t think these white men are a prize or anything, because I love black men, but it makes sense based on her article why they don’t go out looking for African American women – or even black women as a whole. Some of these AA women are just an embarrassment.

  • Reallytruly

    whatkind of fuckery is this?

  • Jillian Wade

    This article is so true! My mom and I talk about this all the time.. This is the type they like!

  • Princess P.

    I think a man will like you and be attracted to you for who you are. Whether you are thin with curves or overweight. I think a man who is attracted to you will accept you for who you are whether you a high school graduate, with a college degree or a dropout. I think a man will love and appreciate you for who you are even if your hair is straight, curly, permed, braided, highlighted, he will love you. Get it, a man will love you for you, whether you are black or white, he will love you.

  • Estella Cohen

    Interesting. I read the first few lines and thought I could have written this many years ago. When I was in my teens and early twenties I wondered my Black guys weren’t asking me out. I would go out with my cousins,danced the disco scene and went to college. However it seemed that where ever I went, if there was only one white guy in the place he would almost always hit on me. At first I always said,”No thanks”. I knew my family wouldn’t like it. Until after one too many nights alone I took up an invitation.Unfortunately, for us as women it’s not who we are attracted to,but who is attracted to us.Men still make the final call when it comes to marriage. If they don’t want to marry you,it won’t be happening. Sadly,my cousins like many Black sisters, are waiting for that BMW that never comes or only passes her by.

  • MHFC

    Apparently black women fawning over and seeking validation from white men is all the rage these days. And it seems equally fashionable for the “adventurous” god that is the white male to oblige. Looks like progress, feels like 1835.

  • Ms. Hill

    When you are able to discuss your relationship without mentioning your race, shape, artificial economic advantage is when you have awakened your fifth eye. queen embrace your authority and stop being a zombie. We are leaders. Experiences that were meant for you are meant for you. “who are we too judge” on the other hand, when we are all able to digest comments without judgement is when your truly elevated to the next level. (use this as an oppurtunity to educate eacj other and stop tearing each other down” Look for the rules and guidelines of the Universe amongst our spiritual text whatever you choose. (no judgement) The rules are all the same. When you are able to speak of true love with no judgement then you have the wisdom to provide advice. I don’t give tites in church i give it to my homeless brothers and sisters, Mothers or fathers in need of feeding there children, fathers needing to get to there sick child. Taking care of my husband, children and elders is my duty “thats waz up” Not an artificial inflation of ones ego. “dont get me started” luv u my brothers and sistas.

  • rainbow

    This just means that the white guys who say these things to you have stereotypes about black women in general. It seems a lot of people like to generalize us but I will fight it tooth and nail

  • sayitlikethis

    ok, so here’s my contribution: I am 5 feet 2 inches, not too fat or too skinny, brown skin, medium-long dreds. I don’t wear makeup and am very well-educated. i know how to make a point without being a loud-mouth. my husband is smart, witty, hard-working, slim and very good-looking. he is also spontaneous and adventurous. and here’s the real kicker . . . he’s BLACK. Does MN want me to write an article about that? probably not. what is the point of these types of articles. does the author feel better now, and more validated because white men will date her? funny how the writers of these types of articles never talk about black men who might potentially be interested in dating them, or for that matter, other races of men . . . only white men. I really think the writers of these types of articles are specifically attracted to white men exclusively and wouldn’t give a black man or a man of any other race a second look. since she has so many wonderful qualities about herself and is such a joyous adventure to be around, why hasn’t one of these men made her his wife?

    • brian

      Some black women it seems worship white men. Which is sad. Why couldn’t the article be “types of white men black women go for”? It makes black women look desperate, like you have to have certain desirable qualities to get any white man

      • 9Boots

        You mad because BW don’t worship BM anymore?

        • brian

          LOL. Most black women want black men, just like most black men want black women. That will never change, we just want each other to act right.

          • 9Boots

            Wrong most BM want to have sex with BW. That is all. You guys do not even back up your claim with marriage. Real men get married to the women they love. Go take a class.

            • brian

              You dont know what most black men want, im a black man and I dont know. All I know is what I want. And im not gonna settle. When I get me a respectful, submissive, can cook, likes to work out, freaky black women that I love and TRUST I will consider marriage. im 31, 1 child, descent job, own place and car, muscular and I can cook. Just got out of a 3 yr nightmare with a chick that had some of those qualities but was disrespectful and not submissive( I tried) enough to be my wife. Cant marry a chick that’s gonna come to my face and tell me to s*ck a dyyck ni**ah, f%got azz niccah(more than one occasion) Not marriage material.
              My momma(married to my pops 37yrs) used to tell me anytime a woman talks about “Real men do…….”, she trying to get you to do something stupid, I guess that would include marriage. Real men work and take care of their responsibilities, that’s it. so im single and happier than I been the last 3 yrs

              • 9Boots

                Meanwhile the average marriage age for nonBM is 27 and you still trying to figure things out. What a shame.

                • brian

                  Gotta find a woman that is worth it

                  • 9Boots

                    Keep your zipper up until you get married.

                    • brian

                      LOL. how can when u keep my dyyyk in ur mouth. And as long women wanna f*ck me, ima do me.

                    • 9Boots

                      Playing right into the over sexed black male stereotype. Good job.

                    • brian

                      Im single I can do what I want, and my son is in a gifted school bytch(might be the next Barack)
                      Unless im raping them its not over sexed black male, its over sexed black people, I know you like blaming all the problems of the black community on the men.

                    • 9Boots

                      Now you are playing right into the misogynoir stereotype. You’re on a streak.

            • thatguy0101

              Hahahahahahaha….. why are you soooooo mad?!? 9boo.ts, you seriously have issues, seek help ASAP, seriously, all jokes aside. Black men do love black women, and vice versa, but like brian said, we want each other to act right. What I notice, physical attraction, personality and other character traits are important to a man…and if a man considers you wife material..

              • 9Boots

                BM lust for BW. Lust is not love. Love plays not games, gets married, provides for wife and family, and does so happily. I do not see this from BM. With the exception of my father and a rare few.

                • Adaeze

                  Your brain is tainted.

        • Adaeze

          You need to stop. Seriously. This is not a good look for you.

  • Pat B

    I’m not on this site often. Every now and then I get directed to an article here that I might deem interesting. After reading it, I have to admit that I’m a little confused. I’m a Black man and let’s say, attractive within reason. I’ve had women of a number of races/ethic groups attracted to me and vice versa at some point during my lifetime.

    However, I don’t remember one time thinking about how I may or may not meet someones approval as to whether or not I’m partnering material. As a matter of fact, that’s the point of dating…to find out. I think I might find an article like this offensive to me if it were directed to Black males:

    “Are You The Type Of Black Guy That White Girls Like?”

    Am I looking at this from the wrong perspective?

  • Guest

    I have noticed that most black girls who most black men find unattractive white men are attracted to. A white man who likes a black girl is usually attracted to her natural beauty while a black man is most attracted to the superficial beauty in the black woman.

    • brian

      that is bull. Most white men are not attracted to black women. That is the truth, the ones that are date different kinds. And there are a lot of black men attracted to natural sistas as well. But everybody has a preference

      • 9Boots

        Why don’t you let the WM speak for themselves. What are you, the WM whisperer?

        • brian

          The numbers who date black women speak for themselves. If they don’t want white, they usually like Asian(and that’s cause of submissive behavior). What force has been holding white men back from dating black women? Dont white men rule the world? So if they wanted black women all along they could have been marrying them in droves, stop selling dreams.

          • 9Boots

            Only abusers and pimps constantly tell women that no one wants them. You and most BM behave in this fashion. BW are going to continue to marry non BM. You gals just need to get over it.

            • brian

              I never said no one wants them. Black men obviously want them cause they are black women. I guarantee u that even though I sexed some white chicks before, most white women dont want o marry a black man, That is a fact, people want to stay with their own kind. Why when I say, “most white men dont want to marry a black women”, am I wrong when nothing supports otherwise.

              • 9Boots

                BW don’t need “most” WM to marry them. We are only 7% of the population.

                • brian

                  u sound desperate

                  • 9Boots

                    You sound desperate all up on a site geared towards BW and posting on an article about interracial dating. Just let it go.

                    • Ebony in Hartford

                      I love your posts. Are you on FB or Twitter?

                    • 9Boots

                      Hi! I’m not on FB or Twitter but I will have a website up in a couple of months. I will contact you on Disqus when it’s up. : )

    • Pat B

      Gotta disagree there.

      Black Men are very attracted to natural beauty, regardless of race. I don’t think you’d hear so many negative comments from them concerning the weaves, nails, eyelashes…etc.if the opposite were true. Those ‘additives’ are what makes anyone’s beauty superficial.

      Now if you talking about EXTERNAL BUT NATURAL aesthetic beauty marks that many Black men tend to appreciate such as a very curvy figure (top, bottom, front, and back… ;) trying to be polite), I agree with you. But you cannot fault a guy for having a preference.

      If a Woman likes tall men, two things come from that…
      1. A man shouldn’t have a problem with her preferences if he happens to be 5’5″.
      2. It doesn’t mean that she will never in her lifetime come across a 5’5″ guy that she considers to be a ‘god among men’.

      That said…everyone should just be allowed their preferences without debate,

  • cestmoi

    I am african myself (parents born in Congo) and I’m born in Canada. The way I see it we are two completely different cultures and people. Just because we all share the same colour does not mean we share the same culture, values, ways of life. I hate the fact that African-Americans represent the whole of black people. I do not in any way identify to AA’s. So to the writer of this article, you shouldn’t be surprised the white guys and/or other AA are impressed with you and think you are different from other blacks. You ARE different. You are african, not AA! It is a shame we must all fall under the same category.

    • Lulendo Luzito

      I am African too from the Congo as well, raised in France and currently living in Brazil. I know AA and Afro latino are different from us continental Africans but I will NEVER date A White man who has prejudice against Black people, NEVER. White men mentally and culturally destroyed the Black people who they enslaved. Now they have the nerve to complain about the wrong behaviour of some of them!?
      This article is stupid and the author must be on of those brainwashed African woman that think White man is a price. Shameful!

      • truthBtold

        Thank you for that. That clarification alone says a lot but most of my people dont understand or can comprehend what you just said thanks to wht people. My fellow brothers and sisters are so brainwashed its digusting and anything negative against thw wht man is concidered hate when in fact they hated us from the beginning. Again most of my fellow brothers and sisters dont even k,ow we are different from the people who live on africa,i wish most of ua did our research so we wont be so far up the wht mans a$$.

      • Adaeze

        The only thing shameful is how ignorant and stupid you are.

    • Adaeze

      THANK YOU SO MUCH. As a Nigerian I can appreciate this comment so much… I hate to be associated with AA’s here because I act nothing like them. Too bad so many jealous haters took offense to the original story lmao Blacks will continue to argue in circles until they kill themselves.

  • Jordan A. Washington

    I remember when I was younger, I had always been told by friends/others that thy could always see me marrying a white guy. I never took offense to that, but I don’t care what color my future husband is, as long as he represents everything that I like in a guy, that’s all that matters :)

  • MMP

    Wait. What exactly was the point of this? I’m not offended as much as confused. There was no point. There was no resolution. There was no substance. From a writing standpoint, it was a waste of time. Diary fodder? Yes.

    Am I to be proud of you? Give you a cheers? A cookie? What? I can only think, “poor thing”.

    As a beautiful, black woman, I needn’t speak of my multiple degrees, extensive travels, or penchant for being pursued by all races of men, before I was married with children … I opine you are looking to make yourself seem “special” because you’re a white guy type o’ girl. And then you wrote it all down to let us all know. Yikes.

  • Tiffany

    These stereotypes could be for anyone. That stat below on college degrees for African Women so not true. Truly must expand your circle if this is all you think Black women are. Like my great grandmom said “what you don’t know can make another world.” Light and love people.

  • Genia W-m

    This is the most ridiculous article I’ve read in a while. Hahahahahaha Can we say ‘agenda” that someone WAS looking for?

    • DaffyDuck325

      I think she was just looking for a reaction from the audience. LOL “agenda?” please.

  • http://www.girlgonetravel.com/ Carol Cain

    When I met my white now husband, I was and still am, loud mouth. I was a single mom to a 4 year old, and you could tell I wasn’t skipping any meals. I was, as I have always been independent, and strong, and vocal, and opinionated and very much representative of my ethnicity and culture. And he couldn’t get enough of it. This is not only an offensive generalization on women of color, but I am actually insulted for my husband.

  • Auntieruckus

    @ezinne “I am a low maintenance kind of gal so I never had a problem taking a hike and ending up at a watering hole” Me either,adventurous spirit my husband called it hehe. I don’t know if there is a specific type “white” men like,but i do think that a confident ,virtuous and humble woman can conquer the heart of any man should he be ready to settle down.
    One of my ex (white) boyfriend used to say that he loved that i never rose my voice or lost my sh!t,i wasn’t doing it on purpose,i am not defensive or anger prone by nature,i understand the power of silence and the act of saying what you must once and let it go.

    Sister,if you are going to live in america and write on an american blog i suggest you remember this: the black woman is perfect and anything else other than that word is a stereotype. In other words keep your views and opinions to yourself.

    Good day.

  • Blackhawk

    So you just going to skip over the whole black women sh!tfest against black men huh? Its a respect thing.. you have to give respect to receive it. Black women need to repent of all the evil that they’ve committed against the black man.. then and only then will things start to get better.

  • not a clone

    Val don’t worry one day you too can be like her, until then get out the hot comb, brush off those knees, yank the belt in, put a smile on and go out and be happy

  • reverbgurl

    I never really thought it was such a big deal. Im in an interracial relationship, i do not have a degree and im also a loud mouthed baby momma who isnt thin (But i do love to travel, and speak proper English) Does this put me at a disadvantage for not fitting into the “what white guys like” yet still being with a white guy? Are you sure this article isn’t putting caucasian men on a pedestal, or exoticizing them?

  • truthBtold

    This site dont like truth…i keep getting moderated like crazy. Smh

  • niclean

    the self-hate and demeaning of black women on here is ridiculous and embarrassing. I am an attorney, married to a computer professional. Everyone in my family attended college, most with professional degrees. 20% of black people get college degrees, (compared to 33% white). Most blacks who get college degrees are women BY FAR. Gyms are FILLED with black women working out. And I know plenty of people who hike, exercise, etc. Maybe it’s a regional thing. Perhaps those who live in rural communities or the south or something, don’t understand the vast diversity among black women. To say that black women are any louder than another race is ridiculous, which leads me to believe those saying such things aren’t really around women of other races. The same for working out, education, etc. Broaden your world and escape the bucket, crabs!

    • Dominique Thompson

      I agree! I challenge people all of the time to spend time with people of different races and they will see that the stereotypes they try to saddle us with are not ours to own. Have you ever spent time with an Italian or Jewish woman? Trust me we aren’t the only animated race of women lol.

  • http://www.yourtango.com/users/cheekee-baby cheekee baby

    Giving the author a hard side eye. I attract men of all races. But that’s because I’m hot not because I’m somehow “white guy friendly” I mean really now get over yourself.

    • Dominique Thompson

      While your comment came off kind of narcissistic it’s true that men like attractive women and that crosses all color lines.

      • http://www.yourtango.com/users/cheekee-baby cheekee baby

        How is it narcissistic if its true? I am hot and I’ve always been approached by a slew of men regardless of race. I don’t need to downplay my looks to assuage people’s feelings. I take offense primarily to this author’s inference that she being of African origin is a cut above the average African American woman and therefore this is what allows her to attract white men. That type of thinking just turns my stomach. Getting a white man to date you is not something that is so special that you need to write an article about it. It really doesn’t mean a d*mn thing.

  • Naama

    The comments in this article only further highlights this author’s points. We black people can be so limited in our thinking and it shows on every level. See the bigger picture and do your research before ciritcising or rather trying to drag down another sista. Her points are very relevantand by the comments here it gives it more validity. When will we ever become a race that chooses to uplift each other rather than tear another apart remains a wonder to be seen…..this is why I usually don’t read comments.

  • Diane Whauloknat Bridges

    Lol@ tresses! Un denial…. Kinks

  • me

    One of my best friends from childhood was a white guy magnet – and now, she is married to a European man and has a daughter. From the time we were like 12, white guys just loved her. She is a beautiful dark brown, with long hair that is hers, lol, and a curvy but thin shape. She loved pop and rock. She loves to travel. She is bubbly and ultra feminine … and they just couldn’t and can’t get enough of her. Black guys always said she “acted white” when all she was doing was being herself. I am finding that worldly, open minded black women have better luck with non-black men. I’ve seen it happen time again. It’s sad but it happens a lot.

    • 9Boots

      All BW have better luck with non BM. BM are the least likely of ALL men to get married. They are a black hole when it comes to marriage.

      • brian

        false less and less men of all races are getting married. And by telling black women to date white men you are setting them up for dissapointment and lonelyness

        • 9Boots

          Please name these men of other races that have a 48% never married rate.
          “Setting BW up for disapointment and loneliness”. LOL. The lies you tell. Waiting on the magical BM to get married and treat them right is setting BW up for disapointment and loneliness.

          • brian

            Go to Wikipedia(they have all the data) to get the official numbers if u want percentages. But when white men date interracial its usually Asian, Spanish, then black women last, but more than 95% marry white women. It also shows that marriage among all racial groups are declining, and people are marrying later in life. White men even have a marriage strike(mgtow) going on until laws become more fair. And how come people act like a certain number of black women(not a high number) haven’t always dating white men. If you check your history more of the famous black actresses of the 50s, 60s use to date white men all the time.

            • 9Boots

              I know the numbers and BM are the least likely to marry by a landslide. BW have been dating and marrying non BM before the Atlantic trade. The only reason why our interracial marriage rates have been low is because BW chose to be loyal to BM to our detriment. Those days are over.

              • In All Honesty

                BW have been dating and marrying non BM before the Atlantic trade, yet their numbers are low because of ‘loyalty’? That makes no sense at all. You’re full of crap like most BW are and finally BM are not afraid to withhold marriage until they find a worthy wife or until the time THEY feel is right. I don’t see blogs and books from White women dogging White men specifically, or from Hispanic women. BW are doing that by the WEEK! So, I envy those men big time because they’re paired with women who are ACTUALLY loyal and actually give a damn about them. As long as men dictate who gets married, BM will be more than fine without you.

                • 9Boots

                  Right let’s pretend that BW have not been loyal while putting up with your low education levels, your unemployment, your refusal to create businesses, and raise your children.

                  Be gone, getting rid of you guys is like the disposing of excrement, a necessary thing in order to live a quality life.

                  • In All Honesty

                    I’ve never heard Hispanic or White women refer to themselves as “loyal”. They let their actions speak for themselves, whereas BW LITERALLY SPEAK for themselves and everyone else. BM had the wool pulled over their eyes and if you think the last increase in IR relationships and marriages in the US census was something, I can’t wait to see the numbers this time around. BM in the US need to catch up with the UK boys.

                    • 9Boots

                      Good riddance. BM have not done ish for BW for the last 50 years other then use and abuse BW. You guys don’t get married, you don’t provide for women nor children. you don’t work, you do not hire BW because you don’t own businesses, you murder, rape, and sexually abuse BW at the highest rates of all women. Leave please. Where’s the Raid at?

  • Mysa

    I wish some of you read the article carefully because then you would know she’s not self-proclaiming those things, but instead those are some of the responses she’s gotten when she asked for a “detailed explanation.” Some of you are blowing this out of proportion! Reading comprehension, folks….

  • Estylo702

    I clicked on this article for the comments…..

  • thatguy0101

    If this isnt a plot to get black people angry and destroy the black family unit, I dont know what you call it!!! Listen people, stop letting little stupid articles like this get your panties in a bunch, especially females. Also, stop generalizing all black men and all women, yes WE ALL KNOW there are some triflin baby momma, hood rat, loud mouth black women out there, we see them on a day to day basis but in the same breath there are some very humble, well-educated, classy, single, fit, respectful black women, and I also see them on a day to day basis also….That goes for black men too; theres some triflin, baby making, no job having, lames, no grammar having, simple minded men out here and there are some black women loving, educated, well-dressed, gainfully employed single, faithful men black men…so stop bashing each other and generalizing, youre only feeding into what the white man wants you to think…..and its working!!! And for the people soo pressed on marrying outside your race because of a few bad experiences, start looking at your and seeing what you are attracting and/or allowing in your life…you are the company that you keep. There are plenty of black men like myself looking for quality black men to commit too..

    • 9Boots

      This article is not destroying the black family unit. BM decided long ago stop marrying and not wanting to raise their children. Man up and take responsibility. BW if you want to be married keep your options open to men of all races. BM are the least likely of ALL men to get married. They don’t value marriage. Actions speak louder than words.

    • ThewordofGod

      Please have a seat

  • Jessica Chantel Craig

    I am a “babymother” I had my first child in high school my 11th grade year his dad was a Freshman in college. I graduated out of high school on time and I went on to college the Summer straight out of highschool and that August I found out I was with child again we were both in college and work not living off the system. But our relationship didnt work because it was time and conflict about what did we really want?!! So person having kids dont make you less! What is a woman thats has been married and now she divorced with her husband kid. She would be called the ex-wife in causal conversation but in court and at child support hearings she will still be called your child mother. And I agree it is a large portion of us that is loud and it makes me cringe sometime especially when I near and then I start getting those they all must be together eyes. But that at the end of the day a person personal choice, if thats the kind of perception that person want. However why not be loud we thats the only image of us is shown on t.v. And the one black woman on the show thats not confrontational she is thought to be . weak. And its people that travel around the world and to me is still ignorant and dont make them . .no better(Justin Bebire since the race and gender cards are out). And the hair issue I will touch on because I am natural and my hair is short I have had to incidents were two African American men told me its a relief to see someone that has confidents in just being simple. In one of the incidents a guy and his friend said they had been sitting at the gas station for 40mintues betting that they wouldnt find one African American woman that was natural it didnt matter in length. And once they started talking to me they was just displeased in how so many of use look at our own mothers who has never used weave more than likely and act like that isnt beauty. And the other incident it was a group of young men both white and black and we had a long conversation, but one subject that stood out to me was he said they approached me because I was the only one different. And at first I was like in what way and they said one you have a smile on your face and two you are the only African American female with your own hair in here so he said look around and he was so right. To sum it up some of what she said is agreeable lets not act like its not however a lot of African American men feel the same. And I think the the real point is be true to yourself before adding anyone to your life establish yourself before adding anyone else. People entitled to their own thoughts so with that being said these are just a few of mines.

  • Pingback: Are You The Type of Black Girl That White Guys Like? « Jade AfricanJade African()

  • kelly

    Please….STOP!!!

  • Lulendo Luzito

    What the author do not say is that most White men who date African women expect/ want them deny their culture, traditions and people… To me it’s the biggest proof of disrespect.

    • Gabie Aldrich

      My Hubs loves learning about my culture.

    • Dominique Thompson

      That’s not true.. Stop generalizing smh.

  • Chyna Doll

    All i have read is negative. To keep it real, I won’t boast about how educated I am because that matters not at this point. I get approached by all races because I am a unique individual period. Stop seeing color and start seeing what’s inside. All these shallow comments about weight, dating white men, and stereo typing is an agenda to get us all distracted on what the real principals to having lasting relationships are. Love yourself first then you won’t have time to worry about anyone else’s flaws or life style. Ciao

    • Gabie Aldrich

      Very True! a confident,self aware person is what folks look for.

    • DeidraJ

      I appreciate your comment. Though I did get a few cheap laughs from a few particularly hilarious posters, many of the comments were disturbing to hear. My concern is for us as a unified race of people. Who are we, that we can’t grow with one another? I know couples who are helping and have helped to put each other through school when one was lacking a degree. Mostly white couples. I know an Asian couple that is doing this now. If that had been a prerequisite for a “decent enough” mate, they would have dismissed the person they now call their soul mate. The example that we should be taking from other races is that they take care of their own. They are loyal to one another, they lift up one another. Even if it means 10 or 15 of them are piled up in one house. They put those resources together so that none of them ever goes without. Forget about how many web sites are dedicated to a white man looking for a black woman. We need to google how many web sites will you find where they are tearing each other down the way we do…My guess is, that’s one statistic where we are the clear winners.

  • Tonyoardee

    Black guys aren’t adventurous??? and we don’t appreciate a fit body?? come one now..

    • jbl

      Right. smh. Fitness is a part of a Black man’s culture, for example how many of us have played sports versus our female counterparts. And men are generally the more adventurous of the sexes.

      • OSHH

        Well what happened to all your porky pudgy obese brethren?
        As if every bm is an Adonis, hardly. LOL

  • Chelley

    I used to think that “white girls dipped in chocolate” (i.e. light skinned girls) were the only kind of black girls that attracted white guys (I think it’s safe to say that for many white guys, if they were to date or have sex with a black girl, she would most likely be light skinned) but throughout my life I have seen a variety of white men and black women couples.

    • ThewordofGod

      Disagree the majority of white men LOVE dark
      black skinned women. People always say black women are unattractive but as a light-skinned woman I can tell you from experience these women are in high demand. They are usually highly educated and have everything a man especially a white man would want. White men love dark skinned sisters.

      • bada bing

        “the majority of white men LOVE dark
        black skinned women”

        You sure about that?

        • Cinnamon

          Yes I’m sure….I’ve seen it too many times before.

      • Adaeze

        The majority of white men don’t even date Black women at all.

  • Yveline

    I am a black woman that immigrated from the Caribbean to Boston. I mistakenly got pregnant, I am a mother, a college student, I have my natural hair but I tend to put extension often . Even though I am a “baby mama” like you call it. I am always approach by white men that want to date me, I always try to use being a single mom as an excuse for them to go away but to right guy it never works. They usually Tell me that personalities, attitudes and the fact that I am positive and driven is what count. Anyway my point is that it doesn’t matter whether you were overweight , smart or Whatever, based on my experiences with white guys What really matter to them is to be yourself, and have a great personalities

    • hollyw

      I am sorry to break this to you, but your story only seems to indicate how white men often fetishize minority women, which seemed to also be the case for this writer. It is their privilege, and they do it often. Just the fact that white men seem to go for ‘natural’-looking black women instead of women who try to assimilate to their race would strongly indicate that it is not simply you ‘being yourself ‘.

      • Ebony in Hartford

        Huh?

      • Adaeze

        You’re sick in the head. A sick person will always see fault in everything.

        • hollyw

          …and ad hominems will never win your argument for you. Better to be crazy than dumb. There’s pills for that; can’t fix stupid. Good luck with that! *deuces*

  • 2

    No. and neither you should be encouraging them 1st to transgress there obligated moral. tfoh

  • Arreba Alicia Stafford

    I feel a bit ashamed now…because I fit the stereotype that a lot of white guys run from…well, according to this article…smh.

    • Adaeze

      At least you are being honest.

      • Arreba Alicia Stafford

        I was being sarcastic…

  • Shawna

    More of “us” and “them” even from blacks from the continent? I don’t judge all white people by what I see on the Bootleggers series or Honey Boo Boo. She was just as insulting as the people who claim that she is “different”. It’s just another way of controlling people and being very lazy about getting to know someone. The comments about blacks being loud-mouthed and not wanting to exercise are stereotypes. Even defining herself as different by being college-educated as if to imply that blacks in America are not just shows how much she has bought into stereotypes and lies.

  • valerieashanti

    Why does white men or any male approval matter? Be yourself and men will like you. It’s pretty simple.

  • HappilyMarriedSwirl

    This girl is brain washed.

  • EbonyLolita

    First of all…….
    The author takes some delight in being the “Magical Negro” Oh you know what that is right?
    The non-loud, slim, athletic NON Black American. As a Black American, multi-lingual, athletic, WORLD traveled person I am offended like this. You know what White men like? A woman that will do what they want them to do. Whether that be black/white/asian/latino. You know why? Because MOST if not ALL men want that.
    This article is a big ole TROLL where there’s a false sense of hierarchy among Them (Black Americans) and US (Africans/CaribbeanBlacks).
    What I want to know is why is the acceptance by whites so important to Blacks (Africans/Caribbeans) and you’re talking from a woman w/a Southern Mother & West Indian Father. Growing up in NYC it really was apparent that when Africans & West Indians were favored by whites it made them happier. WHAT?!?! I stopped looking for White Approval from age 10 and beyond. And YES plenty of white boys try to holla at me. But b/c I’m not frighten fi dem or any other man I keep it MOVING!!!
    MadameNoire please do better in choosing the tone of your articles. The only reason I read this was due to a link from a twitter friend. Clutch Magazine has a little more substance in their posts.

  • Mambo GodisLove Awasum

    I’m African and i have been told that I would most likely end up with a white guy because of the way I carry myself but I prefer black men. I’m more physically attracted to them.

  • Jojo Wright

    Oh wow all the generalizations being thrown around here is just amazing! How people are viewed appears to be relative to the area the person is from and their exposure. Even statistics are skewed.

  • marissa

    I guess I appreciate her opinion and outlook…..but this sounds “stupid” and thats not a word I like to use. I am a black american woman and I am married to a white american man and this article is quit confusing to me. What she is describing is culture attractions and differences…it doesn’t have much to do with race. I find this article weird…but to each their own I guess????

  • Joyce Jones

    This seems more like a journal entry than an article.

  • lola

    As an african lady who grew up in Amsterdam, i must say, there is a big different between White american men and white men in Europe. White men here in europe are more into fashion and culture. So they dont really like low maintentance ladies but women who can dress themselves feminine and classy. A typical date here is to have diner, going to a museums, concert etc etc..as a woman i like that very much, cause i can dress up, let my hair and nails done.

    Normally i like men because of there character not their race..i date men from different nationalities and races, except for american and Australian men. They tend to behave like cave men. They dont have style, they like the hobolook. Girls here avoid this type of men.

    • kisssfromarose

      My husband is European. Im African American. Yes, I do agree with you. In regards to style of dress, make up, etc. Fashion is key. And Europeans stay slim due to bicycle riding and walking. Also, I find European men move into serious relationships quicker than American men and make stronger committments. I also noticed that many African women in Europe were married to white men. As oppose to in America, most marry African men.

      • lola

        Haha, the bicycle thing is true, especially here in Amsterdam. I just came back from the store on my bicycle.
        A friend of mine from the US came to visit me last summer. She was shocked how many ppl are on bicylce and how everyone is so skinny…..And yeah interracial dating is very normal here we have all combination of colors.I dont know how it is over there in America. The race thing is abig issue there i guess.

        • kisssfromarose

          The race thing is a big issue here. When I lived in Europe, all of my black friends men and women (from African nations, the Caribbean, So and No America) were married to white men or women. I had one friend from Dominica who was married to a black man. But I think because there arent large pools of black in Europe. And by the way, my husband loves Australia and wants to move there. I prefer to move back to Europe. I love Amsterdam, btw. Take care.

          • lola

            Oh yes, Australia is a beautiful country with a lot sun and the living costs are cheaper than in Europe……

            thre is a large non white community in europe..espe in London, Amsterdam and Paris. 60 % of the residents in amsterdam are not dutch.

  • CeCe Ugonlearntaday Johnson

    I feel bad for you peeople who’d rather degrade and bash black women instead of trying to help lift them up. You people are so ignorant and rude. And no I am not of those black women you speak negatively of. But I do my part in society to help those women better themselves and their lives. They are just as valuable and deserve to be happy, not torn down.

  • Claudia

    WHO GIVES A DAMN?!

    • ThewordofGod

      I am not interested in white guys but a lot of AA men are on BS and I am now looking outside of my race for a mate.They don’t have to be white..arab men are good options too.

      • 9Boots

        Your a wise woman. Keep your options open to men of all races. Remember, BM are the least likely of all men to get married. The early bird gets the worm. Don’t wait for enternity trying to get some BM to marry you and treat you right. Life is too precious.

        • ThewordofGod

          Thank you for your kind words. People are not very nice to me….As for remarrying I go back and forth but “IF” I do it again I would want the next one to last. I am turned off by a lot of BM. They get on my nerves with their rules and regulations yet they have little value for family and cheating is routine for many.What do you mean the early bird get’s the worm?

          • 9Boots

            Those people that are not very nice to you can kick rocks. They are irrelevant since they are not God.

            The early bird gets the worm means success comes to those who prepare well and put in effort just like if a bird wakes up early it can get the worm first. So lazy bum AA are going to miss out on precious BW being scooped up by men of other races that want to marry us.

            • ThewordofGod

              Ok thanks so much for the explanation….

    • Adaeze

      You do.

  • thezionlion

    I dont think this article was the author’s stereotyping or looking down on other black women. Pretty sure. She was saying that when people tell her she is a different type of black woman, these are the examples that THEY provide. People are getting defensive but she made it a point to say that there are tons of black women who dont fit those descriptions, invluding herself. She also made it a point to say that she doesnt mind the adulation but never at the expense of her sistas. So why would say that and put her sistas down in the same breath? We need to chill.

    • hollyw

      I think most of the negativity stemmed from the point of the article, not the writer’s point… though she didn’t seem as productive towards AA women to me as she did to you, ijs.

  • DrOVOandLipstick

    I think that she makes a vaild point…if you like white people fine…I am cool…until you try to take on their superoity complex…that’s what I hate.

  • Mas Jehsus

    Who comes up with this mess?

  • laurence

    As a smart slim and brown skin black woman, i attract many white men and only date them but most black women don’t since they tend to be fat, uneducated and have kids from different fathers.

    • RuthM

      Darrell, why are you on a website for Black Women? U need to use the library computer to find a job and a home. U are wasting time and people are waiting in line.

      • LMFAO..Yasss!

  • OSHH

    What is with all the generalizing that black women don’t work out, don’t know what squats lunges are etc.????
    I swear some black folks are more ignorant and stereotyping of other blacks than anyone else on the planet.
    Black women do workout and some of us are quite fit, unfazed, cause we are attract all kinds.

    • jbl

      Some, but not most, and there are PLENTY of stats to back that up.

      • OSHH

        Just like not ALL white women are fit and healthy either etc etc.

        • jbl

          And ALL birds don’t fly. But MOST do. We can split hairs, but proportionately MORE white women are in shape and work out than Black women.

          • Dominique Thompson

            Come to Texas honey…

            • huh

              Texas… the South is where most overweight Americans live.

              • Dominique Thompson

                That’s my point. I see fat bad built White women all day lol.

                • huh

                  Yeah… I cant get in the middle of this argument. The number of fat white people I see regularly. Not to say in our community we dont have a problem. But it looks neck and neck to me.

                • hollyw

                  ^laugh-out-loud^

      • hollyw

        There are plenty of stats to back up the fact that most AMERICANS don’t work out, which is why we have one of the highest obesity rates, int’lly. You’re participating in confirmation bias.

  • Alexis

    This article is stupid, and I’m saying that as a black woman in a relationship with a white man. If you’re cute, confident, and take care of yourself, you’re going to attract ALL types of men. Who you date also has a lot to do with who you surround yourself with. If your social group is largely white, of course there’s a chance you could date a white person — vice versa if your social group is largely black. As far as the “natural vs. weave” hair debate goes, I’ve done both and my boyfriend really doesn’t care OR even pay attention. Also, to generalize that white men are more active than black men really isn’t fair. Just because you don’t see a lot of black men snowboarding (or whatever) doesn’t mean they don’t enjoy other outdoor activities. SMH.

    • kb

      I’d agree w/ you about everything you said but
      “As far as the “natural vs. weave” hair debate goes, I’ve done both and my boyfriend really doesn’t care OR even pay attention. ”

      I think this the pt, you’re dating a white guy, in my experience, a white guy that dates a black woman, doesn’t care about her hair per se.( And black guys do care.
      But I noticed in the past few yrs, that black men have become more accepting.
      Also noticed I said white guy that dates a black woman, and not ALL white men

      • Alexis

        I feel you. I only stated it because the article made it sound like the white guys loved her low-maintenance “natural” hair. In my experience, white guys don’t really give a crap about hair. LOL! As far as black men go, the ones I know don’t really care either. I just think it’s about the overall package. Like I said, how the woman carries herself.

    • hollyw

      Exactly. I mean it would’ve even been a small improvement on the article if she admitted to liking to date white men, or h–l, had a white-man preference. But to frame it as if she has a magical ‘white man’ formula…I mean, really lol?!

      Of course, I get how some people feel special when selected by the majority race, even if they’re being fetishized (which sounds to be the current case), but the ignorance was at its height with this one…

  • Alonzo

    One minute black women are arguing white men love them and the next you’re arguing white men only like certain type of black women. It’s sad that black women have to “act” a certain why to possibly attract a white man. I recently read “10 Ways to Attract A White Man” and some of the ways were 1) drop the black woman attitude 2) learn to cook different foods, 3) work out, 4) learn to be submissive 5) etc…. It’s fascinating how black women yearn for the attention of white men yet white men don’t dedicate websites discussing their thirst for black women.

    • Blackhawk

      As a women they should be embarrassed knowing that its not a white male site that have written an article on how to attract a black woman.. but on they have atleast one a day on this site thirsting for white men. I don’t even see men take things this far and we are suppose to be the hunters but its the opposite in this dynamic. These articles just reeks of desperation.. which a lot of k00n women are full of.

      • KamJos

        Actually one site has. Return of Kings I believe.

    • Dominique Thompson

      It’s sad that there are websites and articles dedicated to attracting men period, REGARDLESS OF RACE. There aren’t magazines titles 101 ways to make her yours or how to get the woman of your dreams because men won’t buy them. Ya’ll don’t take stripper pole classes and a bunch of other crap to make you sexier. Women spend way too much time trying to attract men while men spend their time just being. We should do the same.

      • Blackhawk

        I have seen articles in white boy magazines on attracting women.. because a lot of white boys are just socially awkward and weird.. but i have yet to see them specifically write an article that is dedicated to attracting a black woman.. however i have read hundreds just on this site telling black women how to attract a white man.

        • Dominique Thompson

          I wouldn’t say hundreds but way too many. I have dated outside of my race and wouldn’t be against doing it again but we shouldn’t act like White men are some sort of holy grail that we need to train for.

          • Alonzo

            Run a article search on this website. It’s literally been hundreds of IR articles written on here. I’ve been coming on here for about 2 years and I’ve come across at least 50 in the last year.

          • TrulyTruly

            Google ‘how to attract black women’ and I’m sure you’ll find that people ARE in fact wondering.

        • Alonzo

          This website is well known for writing interracial dating articles tailored for black women. For years they wrote articles like “8 Reasons To Date A White Guy” and many others. The IR articles are the main reason the website has lost so many followers. The sister running this website made a grave mistake trusting Christelyn Karazin’s IR platform to pave the way for higher readership. A smart businessman knows to never put all your eggs into one basket. They did. And now the website is suffering for it. The IR dating craze is for a certain type of black woman: The self hating variety.

          • Blackhawk

            Its definitely derives from self-hate.

          • Dominique Thompson

            I think it’s more out of desperation than self hate.I really believe that Black women are getting tired of Black man now I’m not here to say whether it’s warranted or not but I think it’s the case. A women should not seek out a man it should be the other way around. This article was tacky but I think that these types of articles get the most comments and that’s why they continue to create them. So essentially we’re a part of the problem lol.

            • Val

              But, how can Black women get tired of Black men? There are about 25 million Black men in this country. So, how is it possible to get tired of them when you’ve only met a few.

              What is going on is what has always gone on, the stereotyping of both Black men and women. Only now many of us are buying into the stereotypes.

              We, Black folks, have to understand that there are forces both inside and outside of our communities trying to profit off of our insecurities and our self-hatred.

              We have to fight back by being very careful not to buy into propaganda about each other.

              • Alonzo

                Nothing but the truth, but some of these posters refuse to see it.

                • jaded8

                  Love how you say “but some of these posters refuse to see it.” Yet, most of your comments on here have been very anti-black woman.

              • Dominique Thompson

                But let’s be honest most Black women aren’t going to be able to meet all of these men. I agree with you wholeheartedly but what has happened is a lot of Black women have started romanticizing relationships with men of other races not realizing that you can sit any race of women down and they will have a complaint about their mate. It has nothing to do with color. However I am not against interracial dating. I believe in being with a man who treats you well no matter what race he is but being White does not = good man and many women of color have this confused. Ya’ll need to turn off Scandal lol.

              • Blackhawk

                You know what.. i respect that sista. Its a lot of bs thrown around on the internet but i can tell that you are genuine and have a sound mind.

              • hollyw

                Now Val…I know you know what goes on in these comment sections. Not for nothing in real life, but sometimes the troll comments alone here will have me feeling some type a way about black men, ijs!!

                • Val

                  Yeah, I get what you’re saying. I just try to remember not to judge the whole group lest we be judged as a group as well. It’s not always easy though.Lol

                  • Blackhawk

                    Val, don’t listen to Hollyw.. she talk all that sh!t but she still have a
                    black man come over to sn@tch the panties off her every other night.

        • dj

          There are articles, blogs, social events dedicated to wm/bw relationships.

          • dj

            I meant to say that are run by white men. There is a big annual social event in Chicago of all places that is geared for wm who want to meet bw.

            • Blackhawk

              and how in the fuk would you know it?? you must have dug deep and hard for that one.. i don’t even swirl but my homeboy does and if he ever told me about some annual event for bm/ww i would slap the sh!t out of him. ya’ll k00ns never cease to amaze me.

          • hollyw

            I was gone say the same thing; white men pretty much have a fetish site for every race lol…UNLIKE everybody else.

    • Gaybitch

      Shows that BW are checking for WM men rather than vice versa.

    • Rae

      Its really is fascinating to say the least.Wake up people there is no magic formula to attracting a white man. It either happens or it doesn’t. I am a New Yorker, and I have seen white men with black women who all look different (weight, skin tone etc.) . Its so dumb how we tend to group people, when we are all individuals. I have an afro, I am slim, I am light skin and guess what I get spoken to by men of all races as does my best friend who is darker skinned with a perm and is thick. If you are going to connect with someone its just going to happen point blank period. Live your life, be yourself, and be open to love . Thats it. I wonder how I am 25 and get this and I meet older people who think they have come up with the secret to attracting a man. Yes my education, and common sense come into play but even in the movies we see that finding someone is about opportunity, and chemistry. Sheesh

    • RuthM

      NOW I HAVE HEARD IT ALL. You read? You read a book, ’10 Ways to Attract A White Man’? That’s why you hate on Black Women. We taking all the White Boys U Want!!

    • RuthM

      NOW I HAVE HEARD IT ALL! You read? You read ’10 Ways to Attract A White Man’? Now I get it. You hate on Black Women because we are taking all the White Boys U want!

    • RuthM

      Now I’ve heard it all! You…reading? You allegedly reading a
      book about meeting White Men? Now I get it! You are jealous of Black Women
      taking the White Men that U want!

    • enlightenment

      I agree w/ this statement wholeheartedly.

  • kb

    i did cringe a bit… and I think MN is trolling a bit w/this article. but I get what the author is saying, my friends use to say this to me in college. is weird bc up until recently, I had more white men approach me, than black, But now , I think w/the acceptance of natural hair, and also slim body type. It has evened out :)

    • kb

      Also one thing to note, it is important, the author says she’s African, and I remember having a conversation w/ African female friend who said that it had been difficult for her to meet Black American men; like they weren’t interested. She was gorgeous, from the Congo, very smart and educated. She said that white men seemed more interested. ( she later married an African man) This was some time ago tho, at least a dozen yrs, I wonder if this has changed?

      • Blackhawk

        Most Black American men such as myself just aren’t attracted to women without any curves. Its not about being petite either, because its a lot petite women with banging curves and @ss. Traditionally white boys love straight up and down women.. and no they don’t like junk in the trunk. The only thing that they like big on their women are breast. So body types are the only valid point from this whole article..

        • jbl

          I don’t know about that necessarily. Plenty of white Women have nice behinds, You have to remember they are the ones that are running/jogging, doing squats, etc.

          • Blackhawk

            Its more of a new fad that a few white boys actually want a women with a butt now. I guess hip hop culture has had an impact of all races.. but traditionally speaking white boys are not attracted to a big butt. Most white girls used to workout to lose the little that they had.

            • jbl

              I can see what you’re saying. I think white boys have always liked firm @sses, and maybe now are more attracted to bigger ones too. But I don’t think most white boys would want to see the truth of some of these @sses outside of tight jeans.

              • Blackhawk

                LMAO.. i like a big @ss.. but all not big @sses are equal.

              • RuthM

                Why do you know so much about ‘white boys’? Interested?

              • RuthM

                Why do you know so much about white boys? Interested in them?

          • hollyw

            They are running and jogging, NOT doing squats lol…if we are generalizing here.

        • RuthM

          You’re not a man.

          • Not Surprised

            I bet you are though LMAO

        • RuthM

          You’re not a black man interested in women.

        • RuthM

          You are not a black man that’s interested sexually in women.

      • Gaybitch

        She must have been dark.

    • Laine

      Well, I cringed a lot ! MN is definitely trolling us with this article, because they know these articles get a lot of responses. It’s just best to ignore them in the future, and hopefully they will get the hint. I’m so not responding anymore or even clicking on any of these types of articles…SMH

  • Laine

    What kind of ignorant article is this? The kind of black woman, white men want to date? Are you serious???

    • Gaybitch

      They only date light skin anyway.

      • enlightenment

        Not true.

  • happymommy

    My goodness. I have to admit, from my experience, this is true.
    Im married to a white man. Im thin, not a baby mama, have a degree, traveled around the world, Im not loud, etc. I do agree white men are more spontaneous and adventuous- my husband hikes, ski, snowboard, scuba diving- all things I have taken part of. At first I crinched at the title of this article, but I have to admit, most of it is true from my experience.

    • Val

      “Im thin, not a baby mama, have a degree, traveled around the world, Im not loud, etc.”

      Well aren’t you special. Lol! Wow.

      • Alonzo

        She highlighted her weight, degree, and ability to travel the world because most black women are the opposite of her. So in many regards she is “special” in a weird sort of way. We all know black women suffer from weight issues and while many of you might want to lie about it, only 9% of African American women have a college degree. That means 91% don’t. And don’t get me started about black women actually traveling. The average sister has never been outside the continental United States. As for the loud, there’s no need to broach that subject as we know many black women enjoy being boisterous.

        • happymommy

          Alonzo. My fellow black women will never admit that too many have a weight problem and that too many are baby mamas. Most bw I know have degrees. But havent traveled beyond Miami, some the Caribbean. And I come from NJ where everyone is loud.

          • jbl

            I like your honesty. Most Black women in your circle might have degrees, but most Black women or Americans in general outside of your bubble do not have college degrees. And you forgot about traveling to Atlanta or DC, lol.

            • RuthM

              Remember that the company you keep is a better reflection of you.

            • Destiny Campbell

              Actually many black women DO have a degree especially those under the age of 35. Also, there are more black women with degrees than black men so the ‘brothas’ should be the last ones to talk. Also, the only way that a black woman can become a ‘baby mam as’ is if there is a black MAN out there who procreated that child which would mean for every baby mama there is a baby daddy so what makes black men any better. Besides I don’t see anything wrong with being a mother to a child as long as you’re taking care of that child. Why does the black community frown so much on black women having children? Its not her fault if the child’s father chooses not to help in caring for it. Also, the last time I checked a good portion of black men prefer their women ‘thick’ and even date fat white women.

          • RuthM

            You’re not a black woman so please stop saying, ‘my fellow black women’. The issue of out of wedlock kids is sword that cuts both ways.

            • Neco84

              LMAO!!! Soooo true! Dont get me started on how we are always “baby mamas” and other races are ” childs mother”. HAHAHAHA! And girl! Thats a WEAVE thats not extensions.

          • RuthM

            Remember that the company you keep is a better reflection of you.

            • martha

              Yea, I have an MD, traveled to many many countries, speak a different language, slim and trim ex athlete, a laugh very loud. Howard university must be an enigma because and educated black woman send to be as foreign as the author of this article. Stop categorizing us. Men in like who they like period. This white man happened to like you and?

          • Dominique Thompson

            I agree with the weight problem. Black women do tend to take this “thick” thing a little to far but I am really sick of people blaming single parenthood on Black women. Who is getting these women pregnant because trust me it isn’t immaculate conception. We shame women because we see them with the kids while the father is able to be footloose and fancy free. It goes back to the old adage Mama’s baby Daddy’s maybe. 72 percent of Black children are born to unwed mothers so that means that 72 percent of Black men have children with women they aren’t marrying. I don’t have children because I never wanted to be a “baby mama” but marriage rates are down amongst all races it’s just the way that world seems to be moving. There is no longer a stigma associated with unwed mothers. I’m not going to address the traveling issue because it’s very superficial. I enjoy traveling but some may not that doesn’t make me a better person than them. I am the only Black woman in my office and the majority of those women have about 20 years on me and they haven’t traveled outside of the continental US so I think that entire comment was silly.

            • OSHH

              FYI America has weight a problem, it is not just some black women.

              • Dominique Thompson

                You are absolutely correct but we are more accepting of being overweight because we intend to embrace our curves.

                • bsbfankaren

                  As do latina women. Again, it’s the stereotyping that is so annoying about this article and some of those responding to it.

            • jbl

              Who’s raising these Black men….?

              • RuthM

                The Prison system. BOOM

                • ballsofsteel

                  One they reach the prison system they are adults. Raise your boys to be men not prisoner number 174MhtuR9.

                  • RuthM

                    It’s called the juvenile justice system dodo bird.

                    • ballsofsteel

                      So why are sons of intelligent, college educated bw ending up in the system?

                    • RuthM

                      Because they are also the sons of uneducated, ignorant black men.

                    • ballsofsteel

                      Intelligent bw having babies with uneducated, ignorant black men. You may be right. Because I do see many smart black women poppimg out babies for thugs.

                    • RuthM

                      What a horrible and disrespectful way to speak about ur mother…tsk tsk. Stay out of her business.

                    • Destiny

                      Many of these babies are produced BEFORE the women went to college. Its just that unlike the dead beat dads, the mother decided to turn things around and go to school to better herself so that she could try and support her child while the dad was content with doing the same thing

                    • Wut Defock

                      LOW IQ black thugs!!!!!!!!!!!!

                • canwetalk

                  I’m sure your son is probably in one of them.

              • Dominique Thompson

                and they’re doing it alone and have been for some time. A single mother can only do so much. Black women need to start just saying no!

                • jbl

                  Single mothers want 100% of the credit for successes, and 0% of the blame. SMH.

              • Destiny Campbell

                The gang leader who sells drugs on the corner is because the mother has to work two jobs just to put food on the table because the father refuses to be there and show the young man a good example of what a man should be.

            • http://www.yourtango.com/users/cheekee-baby cheekee baby

              Thinner more in shape women have more interest from men of ALL ethnicities. Regardless of her race. This is just fact.

              • Dominique Thompson

                I agree. You said it’s a fact as if I was going to disagree lol.

                • http://www.yourtango.com/users/cheekee-baby cheekee baby

                  Quoted the wrong person.

          • tmw

            You are so wrong and have a warped sense of reality. I live and work in the Middle East. There are thousands if not more black women all over the Middle East and Asia working. Some are young single professionals, others are married taking care of their families. There are also many high school educated young women out here.
            It’s really sad when stereotypes win. Then again, your statements show just how closed minded you are and probably not as well traveled as you claim.

          • bsbfankaren

            My daughter has five friends who have gotten pregnant in the past few years without benefit of marriage, and each one of them is white…and has a white boyfriend! I don’t care if other’s take the time to stereotype me, but I would really appreciated if women of color would stop doing it to each other!

        • jbl

          These are some great points. Most Americans period don’t’ have college degrees. Only about 30% of Americans over age 25 have a bachelor’s and only 10% have a graduate degree. To think otherwise is a part of the great myth of American Exceptionalism. But let a lot of Black women tell it, most of them have degrees, lol. Black women don’t really check for white men, or vice versa. There’s only mild curiosity at best, but they aren’t a viable option for one another.

          • Blackhawk

            I was just about to write that.. most black women think the vast majority of them are college education when the vast majority of Americans regardless of race has a degree. I think they have been watching too many movies.

            • RuthM

              What you just said is all confusing. Are U agreeing or disagreeing? Sheesh

              • Blackhawk

                i’m confused.. agreeing or disagreeing with whom?

                • RuthM

                  Let’s see. jbl stated ‘only about 30% of American’s over age 25 have a bachelor’s and only 10% have a graduate degree’. Then you reply, ‘when the vast majority of Americans regardless of race have a degree’. ???!!?!? So, again, whom are you agreeing with?

                  • RuthM

                    Dag, now I sound like you. I meant, ‘with whom are you agreeing’?

                  • Blackhawk

                    i was agreeing with jbl.. i meant to say “doesn’t” have a degree

                    • RuthM

                      No you didn’t. You are not smart.

              • PuLLitYouWnt

                thank you…..here he go again

        • Nikkita Michelle

          Here we go again, could you please refrain from lumping all sisters in the the same boat. Speak for the women you’ve encountered. You also need to get your statistics correct. I’ve seen countless articles stating that African American women are exceeding the African American male in college degrees more than 30 times over. The majority of black college graduates today are black women. So I’m not sure where you’re getting your 91% from. If we go with your numbers and my facts then that might mean 98% of brothers aren’t graduating from college. As for the weight thing, the weight issues as you call it are perpetuated by black men. I don’t know how many men I’ve heard tell me don’t lose too much weight or you’ll lose your butt. Let’s keep it real, the real attraction to the Kim K.’s of the world is because they have physical attributes that are more so found in black women. By the why all women of any race in the right circumstances will get loud.

          I have a degree, I’m thin, I’ve been out of the country, and I’m married to my college graduating black husband and we’ve both dated outside of our race before we met. Get your facts straight before you start bashing black women.

          • papaduck

            Kim K has a butt minus the fat stomach, arms, and back. Many black women arent suffering from having hour glass shaped figures. Too many are out of shape. Please admit it. Please.

            • OSHH

              Kim k has also had ALL types help via surgical assistance and enhancements, As of late, she wide as all out doors, Get real

              • jbl

                And the average women hasn’t enhanced or created features in some way??

                • Dominique Thompson

                  Nope not many. You can’t tell me that you think the majority of women have had lipo, fat transfers, fake boobs and butt surgery. C’mon now….

                  • jbl

                    …. Lets see wigs, weave, heels, spanx, pushup bras, makeup, nails….. and if more women could afford those other things you mentioned, they absolutely would get a lof of that done too…

                    • OSHH

                      Women’s accessories, things you can remove at the end of the day <<<< Cosmestic surgery, permanent changes to alter one's appearance……, they are not equal or the same.
                      BTW not every woman needs the help of those accessories either.

                    • Destiny Campbell

                      Like she said most black women have not had plastic surgery. Your argument was over the majority of black women’s bodies not hair. Stick to the subject and stop switching everytime you get shut down.

                • momkk

                  i am an African woman and all my African American friends in the USA and Africa are very educated,traveled,slim etc but married to AA/African men. I am ashamed to admit that a lot of Africa women search for white men because most African men are very controlling and abusive to their wives and sometimes to the children.

            • Destiny Campbell

              Alot of black women have hourglass figures. Most black women, especially those who are younger are not fat. Many of them have a kim k figure, wide hips, big butt with a flat stomach. I don’t know where you’re getting the idea that the majority of young black women are running around looking like Monique or Gabrielle Sidibey.

          • jbl

            That argument that Black men only like non-Black women that have “Black” features is tired, weak, and false. First of all, Black women aren’t the only one’s with curves. International travelers know that Keesha around the way isn’t all that physically unique, Keesha just might not know that yet.

            Secondly, men like FIT women with curves. For most Black men it’s about @ss-to-Waist ratio, and a lot of Black women are losing that battle. You can loose the gut while keeping your butt doing something called SQUATS and LUNGES. But most Black women don’t step foot inside a gym to do that.

            Lastly, men period like Kim K. because she’s also pretty and a freak.

            • Blackhawk

              I hate when black women say that they are thick when they have a stomach hanging over the pants. Its doesn’t how big your @ss is if you don’t get your core right.. and i’m not talking about spanx either. Eating right + excericise = sexxy

            • RutM

              Is it true that most black men get their workout in prison yards? Uhmm Im just wondering.
              BTW I really don’t think you’re a man.

              • jbl

                Go to any given gym, on any given day, in any given city and count the number of Black men there compared to Black women.

                • RuthM

                  More doing the prison yard workout than @ 24HR Fitness. IJS gotta keep em’ off that booty

                  • jbl

                    Most Black women aren’t gettin it fit anywhere.

                    • RuthM

                      Most black men arent GETTING ANYWHERE period. Except AIDS clinics, prison yards, probation offices, county jails…I could go on.

                    • Not Surprised

                      Ruth please turn off the computer, TV and radio and get some air, you are delirious and are spouting lies. Geez can’t you dumb asses come up with something new?

                    • RuthM

                      U want to feel the wrath too? Alright. What’s new is that every other group has HIV infection rates, arrests, and murders showing a decline except one particular group (#guesswho). Now u need to spit jbl out your mouth and read up on some important topics.

                    • Not Surprised

                      Oooooooooooooooo I am so scared, another Internet Gangsta on board. WTF is your wrath? A drive by fonting? An all caps cuss out? Or my all time favorite: resorting to racist rants and blather because you lack the intelligence to do much else?

                    • RuthM

                      It took you that long to come back with that? WeAk. But I understand you had to take a break to rinse out ur mouth b4 the nxt trick.

                    • Not Surprised

                      Huh??? You are delusional I have a life outside of the computer, you should log off and get one yourself, or does the cat pee smell and yellow cigarette stained fingernails prevent you from doing so?

                    • Adaeze

                      Lmao all the angry Black fat women thumbing up this loser Ruth. :-)

                    • Adaeze

                      You seem to really hate Black men period. What is your problem?

                    • Destiny Campbell

                      Her problem is that people like jbl came onto this blog FIRST spouting extreme exaggerations, stereotypes, and lies about black women and she decided to let him know that two can play that game. How can a black man come on here talking about the lack of black women having a degree when even less black men have one?

                    • Adaeze

                      Okay. She could have still handled it calmly and intelligently and taken that opportunity to showcase how different some Black women can be and not all of them are aggressive, loud, uneducated, etc… just like “the media portrays”.

                      All I am saying is that you people are not helping your cause at all… all you do is create more drama.

                    • Dominique Thompson

                      Who are these women that ya’ll are dealing with? Jeez me and my crew are constantly working out and watching what we eat..

                    • SMH

                      I suggest you join instagram b/c I follow plenty black women that gets their fitness on and I’m one of them too. #getyourfactsright #theliesyoutell #doyouworkout #getyourlife #comeonson

                  • Blackhawk

                    naw.. i killed you on that one.. take his challenge and lets us know the results you come up with

                    • RuthM

                      Killed me on what? ‘Let’s us’ and ending the sentence ‘with’. Terrible.

              • Dominique Thompson

                and I died! LMBO!!!!

                • RuthM

                  LOL. I really need to get back to work.

              • Zenith

                Lol!!

            • SMH

              You sound like you been with her jbl….

          • Hey hyenas

            Thank you! The numbers for african american women obtaining degrees has increased more than any other demographic. In addition 51% of first born children are born out of wedlock idk why black women just get the babymama title

            • classicIdea

              I think bw get the baby mama title because majority of black mother are unwed. Where as other races, majority are married. But theie numbers are climbing. Either way, I think bw should be embarrassed by this.

              • RuthM

                think BM get the baby daddy title because majority of black men are unwed. Where as other races, majority are married. But theie numbers are climbing. Either way, I think BM should be embarrassed by this.

                • classicIdea

                  Point taken. However, Hey Hyenas was referring to bw. Im not one of those people that have to include other groups when speaking about one particular group. I see that as a distraction.

                  • RuthM

                    Glad to know you can spell particular and distraction. Now, what is a particular distraction is that this article was initially written about a woman describing herself as ‘different’ because she has what she views as valued qualities not common among African-American women and where this conversation has led is to a BW bashing dialogue.

                    • ballsofsteel

                      You are the main one on here bashing. Clearly, you are unable to make a mature comment. It’s easier to bash then it is to relay an educated comment.

                    • RuthM

                      Go take your ballsofsteel and put one in ur mouf.

                    • ballsofsteel

                      So proud to see you demonstrate the intelligent black women you claim are in abundance. By no means is your behavior making bw look bad

                    • RuthM

                      I think you make people with ballsofsteel look bad :)

                    • Not Surprised

                      Don’t let ole Ruthy Baby bother you, she hasn’t taken her meds since they gave her the furlough. You would think as much as she talks bad about black people that her ass would have gotten back on that ship to Europe by now. Must chap her old racist behind to know that black people aren’t going anywhere.

                    • Not Surprised

                      How can she have a mature AND educated comment to share when it’s clear she (or he) lacks both maturity and intelligence. A head of cabbage makes more sense than that troll.

                • jbl

                  So Black men can’t get married when/if THEY want to?

                  • RuthM

                    Oh absolutely…anyone can. But do they allow this in prisons? I’m not really knowledgable on the subject, but I didn’t think inmates were allowed? Educate us.

                    • jbl

                      So now you’re just going for giggles and finger snaps. So typical.

                    • RuthM

                      Now that I know that you are sugar-coated (‘giggles and finger snaps’), it all makes sense.

                    • Not Surprised

                      You are ignorant at best and or a complete imbecile. Today must be “Furlough Day” at the old racist asylum! SMH

                    • RuthM

                      I don’t know anything about prison furloghs. And stop changing ur name ‘blackhawk’, ‘jbl’, ‘ballsofsteel’! If u can’t take the heat..go kill urself.

                    • Not Surprised

                      You have too take your meds darling, that psychosis is getting worse, didn’t the orderly’s give you medication before allowing you to get on the computer? I don’t have the time nor patience to change my name just to harass a moron like you besides you’re not THAT bright if you were you would know that my inflection and manner of talk is way different than those you mentioned. If YOU can’t take the heat, don’t start the fire. Now run along and go take your meds before you REALLY lose it. LMAO

                    • RuthM

                      Now didn’t you just say something about CAPS? Make up ur mind. Interesting that u seem to know a lil bit about anti-psychotics. Family trait?

                    • Not Surprised

                      No actually I deal with individuals with mental disorders on a daily basis and you exhibit classic signs. Any more questions looney tunes?

                  • RuthM

                    Absolutely…when and IF the prison officials allow. I’m not really and expert on the matter (u would know better) but I don’t think inmates can get married?!

              • PuLLitYouWnt

                BW shouldn`t be embarrassed by what another woman does. first i`m not accountable for another woman. second i don`t know her situation and that`s not my circumstances. even though i don`t fall into that category i`m not about to tear somebody else down because of it.

              • Not Surprised

                They get that title because they put it upon themselves and conduct themselves as “baby mama’s”. When one conducts themselves and call themselves the mother of his children that’s what they will be. It’s not what you’re called, it’s what you answer to.

            • RuthM

              IDK why black men just get the babydaddy title.

              • Not Surprised

                I’ve heard white girls refer to and answer to “baby mama” and white boys answer and refer to being a “baby daddy”

                • RuthM

                  STFU. When u overhear this degrading label ‘White’ is not the picture u imagine. And btw, why do u feel comfortable referring to White Men as ‘boys’ and Black Men as ‘men’? If it were the reverse u would yell racism.

            • Alonzo

              You’re wrong about that. Here are the real out of wedlock numbers.

              Asian Women 17%
              White Women 29%
              Hispanic Women 51%
              Black Women 72%

              • Taryn Bryant

                Your statistics are old. Your facts are not percentages, but by the number of live births per 1000. Also you failed to mention the percentages for black women rose the least with only 9% while white women rose by 14%.

          • jbl

            When it comes to college degrees, Black women are basically just the best of the worst compared to Black men and American’s in general. I’m not knocking it, but lets put the degrees talk in perspective.

          • RuthM

            Dont’ let him/her ruffle your feathers. It’s just insecurity showing.

          • Alonzo

            Reading comprehension most not be your strong suit. No where in my comment did I mention African American men and college completion rates. Why do you feel a need to compare black men and women? You read my comment and instantly took offense because you’re one of the women I’m talking about. My comment hit home. There’s no need to lie to me about being married to a black man. If you were actually married to a college educated black man your hubby would naturally associate with brothers of a similar nature and you would be exposed to educated black men which would change your perception of 98% of black men not being educated. But because you were so quick to attack the academic achievements of black men illustrates how you’re not really in contact with these sort of men. Happily married black women never under any circumstances would attack black men, especially if she lives and socializes in the presence of educated brothers. I read your comment and all I see is a liar. You’re not married and everything you said came from a place of anger. On the real, you’re just a fat chick with a chip on her shoulder.

          • Nikki m

            I agree with you 100%. Why does it always turn into bashing black women. Not somebodies babymama, working on a college degree, yes I am overweight but my White boyfriend loves it. 90% of my female friends are collge graduates vs one of my male friends from high school. Stop putting us all in the same category. The reason why theres so many babymamas is bc people are shacking up and not building families. The babymama and babydaddy epidemic is hitting all races not just blacks.

          • PuLLitYouWnt

            APPLAUSE…..your right its like the ppl that bring stats to these forums have never read an article on Black college grads. I went to FAMU (graduated from another college) though i can tell you first hand Black women are graduating. and there are Black men that are too. sadly though graduation for both is not equal neither is enrollment. and yes any woman will get loud. some places/regions actually celebrate talking loud. it just saddens me when i see how many unwarranted stereotypes Black women have to face. however, people see real life examples of Black women graduating, having careers, and being of good character; yet people still want to label all Black women as uneducated, lazy, baby mama, and loud. SMH i know you got yours, but i would tell BW ignore the outside noise and find somebody you can relate to, you can grow with, and yall can love each other. who cares what the world thinks as long as he love you, end of story.

        • RuthM

          I know that it is very early in themorning, and I’m new to this board, but are you the resident troll? Left for an adventurous and spontaneous White Man? I’m just asking.

          I’m not sure where you get your info but your stats are a bit off. Now you arepartially right, regarding 10% of BA’s were awarded to AA Women from 2009-2010. But let’s not overlook the other educational levels: AA Women awarded 13% ofthe Assoc. Degrees conferred in 2009-2010; awarded 12% of MA’s, and 7% of Doctorates in the same year. (national council education stats) Now I can checkthe stats for AA Men but I think we know across the board they have lower rates of educational attainment. #nodisrespecttobrothersjusthisone

          Now re: the author, I think this is her passive/aggressive way of validating herself as an ‘African’ woman. She apparently wanted to ensure that the distinction was made between herself as an ‘African’ vs. African-American women (which is what she is now BTW..based on her citizenship status lol). She obviously has self esteem issues if she finds validation in the desire of white
          men.

        • Gaybitch

          Most BW aren’t anything but victims of insecure BM.

        • Dominique Thompson

          Yet Black women continue to outnumber Black men around the country on college campuses and have done so for quite some time. So if allegedly only 9 percent of Black women have degrees what’s the percentage of Black men that do?The national college graduation rate for black men is 33.1 percent compared with 44.8 percent for black women, according to the U.S. Department of Education so maybe you should start speaking to the brothers because we are doing ok. I think it’s funny how unprotective some Back men are of Black women. Ya’ll will throw us under the bus and drive it! When we are out performing ya’ll on all fronts and yet still fiercely loyal to Black men.

          • Blackhawk

            Stop the b.s.. black women started throwing black men under right after Rosa Parks bus boycott

            • Dominique Thompson

              Please explain this theory to me. If you are only speaking off of emotions I’m not interested in continuing the conversation.

              • Blackhawk

                Black men have just started voicing their displeasure’s about black women within the last few years probably due to the growing popularity of the internet. However black women have been throwing black men under the bus through ever media outlet they could find for decades.. its the truth.

                • PuLLitYouWnt

                  let`s have this discussion and under no circumstances am i interested in a marathon argument with you today….but here`s the deal for decades it has gone both ways. and that`s our downfall. we tear each other down. now here`s where the argument about BW throwing BM under the bus falls short. Clearly its plenty Black women that don`t have a problem with Black men because they still getting pregnant by them. So obviously Black Women are still giving Black men a chance. and let`s be honest there are a lot of sorry Black men out there. but there are also a lot of stand up guys as well. here`s where the difference comes in with the BW vs. BM saga, Black women are not online saying all kinds of horrible things and then jumping ship by the boat load to go date white men. You can see that in the stats about Black women being unwed. These women are not getting married because they are still holding out for a Black man. Meanwhile Black men are light years ahead of us with dating outside our race and also marrying outside the race as well. the moment Black women start seriously dating outside our race will be the moment Black woman getting married will increase. Really its all pitiful and it don`t have to be like that. I have been done wrong before but I don`t blame Black men or tear them down for that. I also know what I bring to the table so I`m not tripping.

                  • Tchalla

                    I think one lie that is sold to BM is that BW are not having sex with WM they do they just dont have very public relationships with them. Of course this is not always the case but it happens more than they will admit .I am married to a BW but I feel this is not a reality for most BP. We just dont like each other but we crave sex and babies. The college thing is a distraction because many BW DONT pursue college BM. Tattoos work way better than degrees with some women.

          • Alonzo

            There’s a difference between college enrollment numbers and college graduation percentages. Black women may outnumber black men on college campuses 3 to 1, but your graduation numbers are only slightly above ours. What does that tell you? It says many of these women are dropping out of school. In other words, they are not completing school. So while black men may need to work harder to up are enrollment numbers it still doesn’t explain why so many black women enter college yet fail to complete the journey. Because based on the statistics black women should be crushing black men in college completion rates but your graduation rate is only 10% higher which on a larger scale means if 1,000 black women graduate college in May, likewise 900 black men will graduate also. See, that 10% isn’t is grand as you thought. Now have a seat.

            • Dominique Thompson

              Have a seat….. Girl stop lol.

          • PuLLitYouWnt

            “yall will throw us under the bus and drive it!” #DEAD lol and you right about the absence of protection there. sadly i see that because there are some Black women that act a certain way now the Black women who are decent college educated ppl get treated like garbage because of it. and i don`t see how this is allowed to happen? because when you see other women they are not plagued by stereotypes of the few bad apples that they have. but for some reason good Black women catch hell.

            • Dominique Thompson

              Because people always remember the loud one with lime green hair and talon nails even if she’s 1 out of 100.

              • PuLLitYouWnt

                I would argue 1 out of at least 10,000 lol @talon nails

          • Pat B

            This is true. However you also have to take into account that there are more Black women than Black men on the planet earth! Depending on where you live, the population of Black men are outnumbered by Black women from 200 – 300%.

            By sheer numbers, yes…there are more Black Women in college attaining degrees than Black men (and those numbers have actually grown recently to what they are, so BW in general should be acknowledged for that). However, the percentages of all Black women are in college or having attained degrees is actually not greater than the percentage of all Black men that are their counterparts.

            • Tchalla

              Another fallacy, there is no country, county, or city that you will be able to name where the women outnumber the men 2 or 3 to 1. Most of the number balance that does exist is in older men and women. Women especially younger ones hold the key to dating and reproduction but they dont like us but they want babies! It should be obvious by the way some BW choose men that they dont want husbands they want babies.

        • Claudia

          She highlighted her weight, degree, and ability to travel the world because most black women are the opposite of her.<<< YET black women are the biggest demographic in college enrollment and graduation… Hmmmm sounds to me like you're swallowing BS

          • Breezus (Remix King)

            didn’t he say enrollment and graduation are two different subjects dumba$$?

        • Claudia

          We all know black women suffer from weight issues<<< And white women don't? Self hating much?

        • PuLLitYouWnt

          i`m not over weight. i have all that this chick is talking about however again let`s see the whole issue here. the country is suffering from an over weight problem. Black women are not the only people who could use some exercise…and i see Black women all the time that are no where near over weight. and just because you haven`t left the country doesn`t mean you have not traveled, it means you haven`t traveled abroad. before 18 i went up and down the entire east coast and have done a number of things. when i get some time i will travel abroad. and my personal opinion is before you travel abroad you should explore your home country and get a feel or appreciation for that. there are things here that you should see too

          • Alonzo

            In regards to weight please stay on topic. Bringing other races into the fray is pointless as this article is about black women. And why are you telling me about traveling up and down the East Coast? The E.C. is not traveling abroad. The average black woman lacks the financial resources to travel the world. Outside of joining the military black women remain stationary here in the states. Traveling abroad for most of you is traveling to Miami for Spring Break! Big Deal. LMAO. I have been outside the country 4 times on my own dollar. I’ve been to Guam twice, Brazil once, and Scotland once. I didn’t see any American black women in these countries. I have no need to lie. You just weren’t there. And if you had to find me five black women you knew that have traveled abroad I guarantee you couldn’t do it.

            • PuLLitYouWnt

              i am on topic thank you. i merely pointed out that “weight” is a problem that faces the entire country not just Black women which is fact. let me also point out that i can see you want to argue for argue`s sake…thaat`s not what i`m about. Find you five women? not hard at all because I currently attend a university where international travel is highly encouraged an many students including Black women that I know personally travel abroad quite often and yes to places other than the islands (which still counts as abroad by the way) So I wish you put some money down because I would be taking it…and no you don`t need to lie because what you do isn`t in question nor do I care. and traveling is still better than not going anywhere. I won`t let you discount my travels as if traveling to different states (for recreation) is something people do at the drop of a hat just because. and since when did Black men become so rich to be able to travel the world so often? because they way you talk about BW it sounds like your saying only Black men travel because they can afford it….

            • jaded8

              You sound like a bitter idiot. No black women in Brazil?! “Brazil and its almost 200 million population is no longer a country of
              white majority. The credit now belongs to the 49.6% black or mulatto
              population compared to the 49.4% defined as white and this is set to
              increase in coming years with that percentage increasing to 54,
              according to a recent report from the Rio do Janeiro Federal University.”

              I have been to Guam twice also and saw black women each time I was there. I have lived in several places in Asia, and the expat community ALWAYS contained black women- Seoul containing some of the best people (of any color) that I’ve ever met, hands down. I’ve been to many places in Europe (though not Scotland), and I saw black women there as well, most notably in Rome, Paris, Annecy & London. I saw black men in these places too. For as many black women that I know that haven’t traveled abroad (since you place so much weight on that), I know of as many or perhaps even more black men that haven’t traveled anywhere but Miami also.

              Also, I go to the gym regularly and I see about an equal amount of black men and women in one of my gyms.

              I’m from an island but live in America, and thus consider myself African American. I think you’re a poor excuse for whichever group you claim to represent.

        • Jacara Fatin

          I have a problem with your “most black women are the opposite of her” statement. We’re not. Lets have a positive outlook on our sisters. I hate how people take one stereotype or demographic of the black woman (fat and sloppy, a baby mama, on welfare, knows nothing more than a 3 block radius of her (section 8) house) and apply that to EVERY black woman. And if they see a black women who doesn’t fit that idea, then they are “special” Yes, some women are like that, but myself, my friends and women I know aren’t. Happymommy, this takes nothing away from you, so please don’t take offense. But, Alonzo shes not “special”. I too have travelled the world, am not a “baby mama” , have a B.A, am not loud, etc. I am thin, but I’m certainly not fat (I’m a size 6). I don’t like to think of myself as “special”, because, size aside, this is how many black women are, or should be thought of.

        • Kimmie

          I’m not sure where you are getting your facts about education. Check the census bureau website for more accurate information. Your comments about being boisterous is typically found in poorer communities and please let’s not assume that all African American women enjoy embarrassing themselves in public. *shakes head*

        • Neco84

          Very true

        • thatguy0101

          As much as I like to stick with the brothas on this site,…bruh, I’ll have to disagree with you on a few things. Location means alot. of course living in detroit, alabama, or some other area where young people dont gravitate to, you well be saturated with more hood rats and baby mommas than fit classy educated women but I’ve lived in the dc/md/va area and I know ALOT of well educated, well-traveled black women….and infact, there are alot that are insahpe and alot that are out of shape but blame that on genetics homie…plus skinny aint in, at least to me it isnt. I like just alittle meat on a woman.

          • jaded8

            I agree with most of what you said, but skinny does not equal fit! Fit = Fit. Girls with muscle and curves. Girls with flat stomachs, small waists, toned arms and awesome legs, don’t always equate to skinny. :)

        • Neco84

          I agree. Mostly white men are attracted to me as well. BUT I believe it has nothing to do with stereotypes of baby mama, ghetto, etc. I think it fully has to do with “like attracts like”. I grew up in the suburb of a huge city…. Middle class, college educated, so and and so forth. When i moved inTO that city it was more racially diverse. And I was still mostly approached by either middle class white men OR middle class black men. It was not race specific. Nothing to do with race. Now im happily in a wonderful relationship with a black man who is MIDDLE class……. Like atteacts like.

        • http://www.iamdynastyonline.com Toni Von

          I do not know where you obtained these numbers sir. These percentages are bogus. And judging by your logic I doubt that you even finished high school. SMH.

          • Breezus (Remix King)

            Gay nïgga shut up.

        • anonymouse

          Yes and most Black men muscle-built, well traveled and educated, have no children and are respectable pillars of society, right?

          Your 91% stat is flawed in so many ways because it doesn’t take into consideration age or occupation. The fact is that nearly 60% of degrees among Black people are earned by Black women.

          But continue being silly.

        • Destiny

          Get your facts straight, the stat says that 9.6 percent of black women are ENROLLED in college compared to only 6 6 percent of white women. Thats right there are more black women in college than white women percentage wise because younger black women are actually going to college at higher rates than ANY group of people in the US. Also, nearly 25 percent of black women currently have a degree including myself and several of my friends and cousins so you can try again with that crap. You African women are no better than anyone else you just obsess over white people. Also there are plenty of big African women and alot of African cultures prize thick women just as much as Afro American culture does.

      • happymommy

        Well thank you for noticing.

      • Ms.D19

        Yeah I guess she’s a cut above us “other” Black women. Love who you love, but’s a shame she’s try to seperate herself from what she thinks is bad Blackness. At the end of the day she’s still Black and that wont change.

      • chicadujour

        She also “crinched” while the rest of just cringe!

    • Ms.D19

      Its unfortunate that you have to stereotype other Black women to make your point. Hmmm…you can still be married to a White man an not think you’re better than other Black women. That comment was rather race depricating. SMH…

    • Gingerbread31

      Women like you do not have genuine self-esteem, and so you live life trying to be better than the next to feel good about yourself. A happy Black woman speaks of a sound mind and you sound superficial!
      Your husband is white, so do some research and see what he’s really attracted to you because majority marry trophies but they play with thick, baby mamas, not well traveled, who would never hike, ski, snowboard, or scuba dive!

      • Gabbi

        Exactly

      • Adaeze

        You’re irrelevant.

    • Gabbi

      Funnily I am the opposite, I am curvy, I have a son from a first relationship, I am loud, I am getting my PhD and traveled around the world. The opposite Yet I attract many white men. So nothing special. Men are men.

    • Neco84

      I agree…. White men, primarily, are attracted to me as well although i am currently head over heels with a black man I am dating. BUT my explanation is this: People tend to be attracted to people who are similar with them. Period dot dash! Regardless of race some of the time. I grew up in the suburb of a very large city, well educated, middle class family, no kids, etc. When moved INto the city where it was more racially diverse…. Yet and still, mostly white men OR very well educated black men approached me. Hence, why im dating a very well rounded/educated black man now. I will willingly admit that literally half the people I’ve dated were White or middle class black. I dont think thats just a coincidence.

    • jewel

      It’s 2014 ladies, it’s not some type of rarity for black women to have degrees (multiple ones) and be in good shape, gees stop buying into these stereotypes that black women are all single parents, fat and uneducated.

    • hollyw

      Mmmm you might have missed the point. Everything you mentioned is what MOST men want, not something that white men specifically seek out. So more could probably be said about your preference than your husband’s…

    • http://www.yourtango.com/users/cheekee-baby cheekee baby

      You sound REAL dumb. So you are pretty much saying you aren’t a stereotype of black women. You are better than the average black woman which is the only reason why your white husband chose you? Girl bye!

  • Val

    Here we go with this again. Smh.

    • happymommy

      Yet, you took the time to read it and comment…

      • Gaybitch

        And you tom the time to reply to her.

      • Trisha_B

        Maybe b/c she wanted to see if this article was going to have a different approach

        • hollyw

          Right, and it got progressively worse. I stopped at “b/c I am soft-spoken instead of loud-mouthed…”

          –_________–

          • xxdiscoxxheaven

            I am pretty offended by this article as a whole.

          • mari

            I’m soft spoken and dudes don’t even like me LOL
            I doubt that’s one of the specific reasons why white dudes like her lol

            • hollyw

              Exactly. Black women get the stereotype of being loud, but all I remember in college was screaming, shrill white girls running around everywhere and being flamboyant for no reason…errm, the blacks were way reserved in comparison. That’s okay, though, people who think like this bring together.

      • hollyw

        I don’t get the point of that statement. Of course she read it; how else would she know it’s the same, tired b.s..??

      • YoungAfrique

        Didnt need to read it ,the title gave it away.

    • Gaybitch

      Ikr. White menz are only into black boipussy.

    • Clarkson

      Hey Val, do you remember me?

      Nevertheless, I agree… “Here we go again”. As soon as I saw this article, I knew it would get, at least, 3 – 5 dozen comments and I was right.

      I abhor ignorant articles such as this.

      • Val

        Yep, I remember you. These kind of posts are basic, offensive and condescending. But they generate lots of clicks so they keep coming.

        • hollyw

          Man. Man. I just read the sentence: “I am soft-spoken instead of loud-mouthed, I enjoy working out and it shows, I have a college degree, and I am not a “baby mama.”

          …and my mouth fell open. Like, literally. So basically, the only way to ever get away from these stereotypes as a Balck woman is yo just be African…

          MUST BE NICE! Smmfh this piece-of-sh– article…

          • Val

            I know, right. This one tops the ignorant post list.

            • hollyw

              Top of the top!

              …and is no one going to mention how this article had “fetish” written all over it?? It is a white man’s privilege to fetishize minority women, so when I hear stuff like ‘they like my natural hair’, I automatically think, No duh, it’s probably BECAUSE of your natural hair that he’s attracted smh. I instantly noticed the more attention I got from white guys after I went natural, and it is as she said, they have mad questions for you, want to touch it, and have a slough of stereotypes to go along with it all. Only, this in no way was flattering to me…some women will fall for anything.

              • xxdiscoxxheaven

                I actually agree with you here. Black women with straight hair don’t stand out as much as naturals. So clearly, if he notices you for that fact alone, it is a fetish.

                • atheepyonga

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                • Destiny Campbell

                  Its no more of a fetish than a white man preferring blondes or a black man obsessed with curly caramel skinned mixed chick

              • Ace

                Yeah like those white guys that chase after Asian women for their Oriental fetish. Then why they are over their phase they drop them and marry a white girl.

              • Adaeze

                You sound very paranoid and unhinged.

                • hollyw

                  Thanks

          • Jaggy96

            I’m african too and I agree with this article 100% because it is true, you didn’t have to read the article smh

            • Guest

              I’m african too and I disagree with this article 100% because its glorifyingly narcissistic, I shouldn’t have read the article smh

            • hollyw

              Oh, you didn’t read it, but you know you without a doubt, 100% agree, apparently just based on the title and the writer being African, huh lol? Smh that is truly sad and funny, that you must be one of those Blacks who thinks they’re better than American blacks and is flattered by the attentions of a white man… Carry on.

          • Surprised

            please don’t blame this on Africans. These kinds of people are ignorant and they are being themselves, it has nothing to do with their ethnicity. All the Africans i know (including me) don’t act this way at all. It really depends on the person, don’t let this affect your views on Africans as a whole or else you wouldn’t be any better than the ignorant person that wrote this. :)

            • hollyw

              Oh, I don’t blame anything on nationality, let alone Africans as a whole lol.

            • jase

              Well put. Point taken.

    • thatguy0101

      Hahaha right!!