14 Things You May Not Know About Orgasms

December 27, 2013  |  
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Orgasms: sometimes reaching one seems as complicated as reaching the magical land through the closet in “The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe”—the tiniest wrong turn, or speed, and you just won’t get there. But, they aren’t all scary: there are some really great facts about the big O! Plus some comforting ones. Here’s what we learned from WomansDay.com.



You need to tense up to orgasm

Contrary to the popular relief that you need to relax or go limp to orgasm, your likelihood of reaching orgasm increases when you tense up. Doing a Kegel (imitating the contraction you would do if you were trying to hold in urine) sends blood flow to your vaginal area, which helps with arousal.

Source: Shutterstock

They can replace your Advil

Because having an orgasm releases oxytocin—a chemical that induces feelings of relaxation, peace, safety and other positive feelings—they can briefly alleviate pain from everything like a headache to arthritis.



Just thinking of an orgasm can relieve pain

Research has shown that simply thinking about an orgasm—really thinking about it by closing your eyes, visualizing a partner and imagining the sensations—can relieve pain.


Condoms won’t minimize your orgasm

Studies have found that women are just as likely to reach orgasm with or without a condom. In fact, some scientists speculate condoms may help a woman’s chances of reaching orgasm: since the man doesn’t need to worry about ejaculating too early and needing to pull out, he might be able to last longer.


1 in 3 women struggle to orgasm

Planned Parenthood reports that 1 in 3 women struggle to orgasm with a partner, and as high as 80% of women struggle to orgasm from intercourse alone. As a whole, female sexual dysfunction (which includes failure to orgasm) is experienced by 43% of women.


There are medications that can help you orgasm

Eros, an FDA-approved device, helps blood flow to the genitals and can up a woman’s chances of orgasm. There are also over-the-counter creams that can increase sensitivity in the vaginal region.


The origins of the “G-spot”

Many women believe the “G-spot” simply stands for the “Good spot” but in fact it is named after Ernst Gräfenberg, MD, a German gynecologist that discovered the region of female genitalia that contains a large cluster of nerve endings.

Source: Shutterstock


Orgasms improve with age

If you’re getting depressed about wrinkles or the effect gravity is taking on your boobs, here’s one thing to cheer up about regarding getting older: your sex life might get better! Studies have shown that more women in their 40’s and 50’s experience regular orgasms than women in their 30’s. There is no scientific reasoning behind these findings, but it could be because with time comes experience and older women know how to direct their partner to help them orgasm more.


Variety can help you orgasm

Women have reported having an easier time climaxing if they incorporate several sexual acts or positions into a romp session. For example, having your partner both manually please you and have intercourse with you will make it more likely that you’ll orgasm than just one or the other.



If you love your vagina, you’re more likely to orgasm

There is a link between a woman’s sexual confidence and her likelihood of orgasm. If a woman feels insecure about the way her vagina looks, feels, smells, tastes—you name it—she’ll struggle to orgasm. Just know that there is no such thing as a “normal” vagina and they come in all shapes, colors and sizes.


Men don’t realize how infrequent your orgasms are

One study had 84% of men reporting that they believed their partner orgasmed last time they had sex, but only 64% of women reported having actually orgasmed during their last session in the sack. So, communicate! A lot of men don’t know that they need to work harder.


There is such thing as the spontaneous orgasm

You may have heard tales of women who orgasmed from riding a horse or getting a massage, and some of them may be true! Certain activities stimulate blood flow to the genitals and induce relaxation, two crucial components to reaching orgasm.

Source: Shutterstock

For the most part, men orgasm first

It’s normal that a woman takes much longer than her male partner to reach orgasm. In fact studies have found that most women need at least 20 minutes of sexual activity to reach orgasm.


You can delay your guy’s orgasm

If premature ejaculation on your partner’s part is making it impossible for you to orgasm, there is a way to slow him down, without ruining the mood: try applying firm pressure around the base of his penis with your hand.

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Comment Disclaimer: Comments that contain profane or derogatory language, video links or exceed 200 words will require approval by a moderator before appearing in the comment section. XOXO-MN
  • Dave Youngman

    Interesting that a post criticizing somebody for making a cruel comment was allowed but a comment regarding sex was deleted. I LOVE these moderated web sites where some retard decides what is “proper” – especially when a mature, polite and extremely useful piece of information is posted. .. won’t be back. Your loss.

    • endosutra

      I agree. Whoever is modding this site needs to get the stick out of their arse.

  • Xendor

    You fail to mention the refactory period (which permits women to have multiple orgasms) and the zero refactory period of men that prevents men from having multiple orgasms. Nor do you mention “petit morte”.

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  • Joyce Clemons

    Good article. I had 3 orgasms just reading it. Well, I think I read it.

  • penguinApricot

    The average man has these once per day for most of his life, Sometimes in his sleep. Women don’t need to have them. sorry about that.

  • Peter35

    From watching this I conclude our population is at least 60% BLACK, funny that; not what the stats say.

  • All Purpose Al

    I know the woman in the lead photo isn’t having one!

  • Frankie “da scarf”

    Why are most these couples black or mixed race? More liberal indoctrination.



  • Dave Kalin

    I knew most of this. lol

  • April

    The thumbnail of the woman on the first page, I couldn’t stop laughing lolololololololololol

  • billious


  • Gave Up

    Never had one, so i wouldn’t know 🙁 #suckstobeme

    • April

      No way, do you have anorgasmia? I would talk to a doctor about that.

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  • sebastian barcelone

    whats up with all these black people on here. they even got a black women with a white guy!

  • Brenda Denton Langbein

    It’s funny my comment that included a copy/paste of part of the article was not approved LOL Ok I will rephrase it . I don’t like how the article says “failure” to reach the peak is experienced by 43% of Women. wouldn’t “inability” had been a better choice of word? Way to make 43% of women feel like failures.

  • Mark

    it’s funny that one thing says being tense increases orgasms, and then another points out relaxing while riding a horse does as well. Maybe neither has to do with it geniuses, and it’s about stimulation?

    • Kitty

      I swear I was just about to say this

  • Mallory

    I’m sorry but the first picture in the slideshow is SOOO incredibly unflattering, that woman’s mouth and face look REVOLTING! The photog shouldn’t have set her up like that

    • Dave Youngman

      The poor girl is probably a model (of something) and is checking letters to see what people think. I’m sure she – or any other woman – would appreciate comments like “REVOLTING” and “she’s so ugly it made me want to NOT read the article.”

      Ain’t we compassionate.

  • Phil J.

    i need at least 20 min to… is that not normal!?

    • Brenda Denton Langbein

      Normal is relative, if you are happy then YES it’s normal.

    • David Armes

      Only 20 minutes? I spend at least an hour because for me having sex is my way of showing my love for her. I always make love as if it was the first time because it maybe the last time. Having sex is a show of love and not ‘casual sex’. I guarantee if you have this in mind orgasm(s) will come naturally.

      • Phil J.

        i said at least 20 min oooohhh an hr wow you won the pissing contest rah rah hooray lol

        • David Armes

          Phil…Phil…Phil…Sarcasm and dry humor is so hard to get across. Please regard my comment with that in mind. I meant no disrespect. After all I enjoy a “quicky” as does my girlfriend in the early mornings on occassions!

  • Taneesha Culture Clash Thomas

    I feel better already

  • Great article. Super helpful for the ladies. I’m glad to know that this is being addressed medically for women also.

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  • hi-liter

    The lady in the first pic looks like a vampire.

    • Angyl

      I don’t know – I see her as more of a gremlin than vampire – vampire would be a big compliment to her,

  • NVAdamzz

    I’m sorry but the woman on the first page is not s3xy at all. I know we all may make weird faces when we reach the big O but she looks like she’s about to take a 12lb isht.

    • Melissa Mosley

      pic made me NOT want to read article

      • Shannon Varga

        Cause it looks like a 14 year old boy with lipstick on

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  • Gigi

    Great article. Super helpful for the ladies. I’m glad to know that this is being addressed medically for women also.

  • Just saying!!

    Ugh Madamenoire!!! First of all, you all REALLY got my attention when I went to the site and this title was the first thing I saw lol. But of course since I was so eager to read it, the whole screen is black and I can’t read the text. This hasn’t happened on this site in a while so idk if its you all or me but if it is your site can you please create a better option for people on their phones? I don’t always have access to the computer. I guess for now I will have to keep reloading every page hoping it stays white so I can read it lol smdh

    • Chosen1

      OMG! And there are so many ads it’s not even funny! I can see nothing without hitting an “X” 5 seconds

  • kiki j

    Good article. I told my husband it cures my headaches but he never believes me now I have proof! Lol Tmi I know but hey since we are on the subject…and as for that 43% that never reach their peak from intercourse that’s a sad life to live! Why even do it!

    Ps MN why talk on a subject when you know the comments will be moderated and deleted every time the “s” word or “o” word gets said? I’m so about to stop commenting.

    • Losh

      IKR…and then why did the women in the picture with the 43% statistic look so happy? I’m sure they lead otherwise fulfilling lives, but if the picture is solely about NEVER having one, I for one would have ruined the picture by looking like Eeyore.

      • kiki j


        • Ben

          ~The Truth of Life in 3 Pages~
          Google “TruthContest” and Click on “The Present”./

    • Old girl

      Ms. Kiki, the reason why you still make love w/your husband is because even though both of you may not ‘O’ (my husband has prostitis, so he usually doesn’t ‘O’) is because it still makes you feel closer w/this dear one you love so much. Certain chemicals are still released.

      • kiki j

        He doesn’t have an O? That’s not a problem at all! Lol I know I’m selfish.

        • billious

          shut up cow

      • ladybug

        After being called a cow from the person below I reread my last comment to see why I was being a cow. I was hacked by my sister I didn’t make that comment. Sorry Old Girl. I would never be that insensitive.

    • Dave Youngman

      I can understand moderating if the posts are derogatory, based on commercial interests or full of F bombs etc but fer heaven’s sake this is an ADULT help site. Allow the adult exchange of ideas without bleeping adult anatomical words and procedures.

      I see my post on a G-SPOT technique has already been deleted. I was NOT an ad or a commercial. It was sharing a technique that has helped thousands. The mods must be retired NUNS.