Are You Coddling Your Son or Raising Him to Be a Man?

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Too many of our boys are coddled into the real world, with Mommy there to play Mrs. Fix-It and defend poor choices made too late. Circumstances may not be the best, so instead of teaching them how to work with the cards they’re dealt, many mothers attempt to overcompensate by giving everything and accepting very little in return. Despite bringing home terrible grades for example, plenty of boys have mothers who work double shifts to be able to buy them new iPhones and more for Christmas. Although it’s done with the most genuine of intentions, it inhibits development and only entrenches them deeper into boyhood. The unconditional love of a mother can be blind and, sometimes, we have to take a step back and put things into perspective for the better. Ask yourself the following:

Am I constantly making excuses for bad behavior?

Do I just let things go?

What am I protecting him from?

Why aren’t my standards higher?

How much of what I give him does he earn?

Is failure going to boost his self-esteem?

Can he adequately speak for himself?

What are his goals and dreams?

When mothers “protect” their sons from failure and disappointment, boys are crippled. For misbehaving, they should be reprimanded—every time. Why? Bad behavior is just that, bad. For every action there is a reaction, better to learn the lesson earlier than later in a prison cell. Boys who like to test their limits may seem like they’re always in trouble, especially around ages two and three; but, consistency is essential. Start young and you will be able to rest better when they’re older. Boys need to understand that poor choices always have consequences; and, since no one really gets away with anything in the long run, it’s in their best interest to make smart decisions. No exceptions, no excuses.

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