Source: Shutterstock
A recent study found that marriages that begin in one’s early 20s are at a high risk for divorce. That might seem obvious—people who marry at, say, 19 are probably impulsive and don’t know themselves yet! But there is more to it than that. It’s not just horny 19-year-olds at risk. Even young “adults” (20 to 25) are at risk for divorce. Here are reasons why young marriages often come to an end.
Image Source: Shutterstock
The stress of having no money
You have, like, no money yet. In fact, you’re probably still paying off student loans because you just started paying them off. You’re barely putting anything away. When you weren’t married, it didn’t hurt your relationship. Your financial problems were at least your own to worry about.
Source: Shutterstock
Why it’s a problem
Once your (very empty) bank accounts are joined, you start to attach your negative feelings about money to your spouse. You subconsciously or very consciously begin to blame them for your financial stress. And now you two have to talk about money and how you will spend it from now on because it’s both of your money. Money talk is a romance killer. Especially when you’re not used to it, and you don’t have a lot of it.
Shutterstock
The stress of having tons of money
You also haven’t experienced another money phase: having a lot of it! One of you is going to land that big job or get that business idea off the ground. Once you do, you’ll be swimming in money.
Shutterstock
Why it’s a problem
Going from broke to broke off as a couple can also be stressful on the relationship. The person who made the money might resent the person not bringing home the bacon. The person who didn’t hit the jackpot might feel insecure, as though they’re dependent.
Shutterstock
Your friends are still partying
Your friends are doing lots of things that aren’t really married people-friendly activities. So you don’t hang out with them as much. And maybe they don’t invite you out as much.
Shutterstock
Why it’s problematic
Your partner becomes your entire social life. You’re together all of the time because you just don’t relate to your single friends anymore, or you don’t feel right leaving one another at home alone. So you slowly start to get bored with each other.
Shutterstock
You’re not settled in your career
You’re in apprentice positions. You’re working the mailroom. You’re at the bottom of the ladder at your full-time gig. And hey, in your early and even mid-20s, that’s normal.
Shutterstock
Why it’s problematic
You’ll most likely hold yourself back, in favor of your marriage. You’ll be afraid to take higher positions that would require more hours, more of your focus, or even that you move to a new place because you don’t want to hurt your union. You’ll inevitably resent your partner for that exact reason.
Shutterstock
And your career takes all of your time
When you are young, if you do want to get somewhere in your career, you have to work around the clock. You don’t get to work normal hours. You have to work the job you don’t care about to pay your bills while you pursue your passion at night or on the weekends.
Shutterstock
Why it’s problematic
There’s no time for marriage. It’s a catch-22: If you’re with your spouse a lot, it’s because you’re not pursuing your passion. If you’re pursuing your passion, your marriage suffers because you’re not around as much.
Shutterstock
You haven’t dated enough
You might think you’ve dated a lot because you’ve had, like, three relationships. You’ve slept with at least two people. You’ve been around the block, you figure. But you really haven’t had a good chance to see what’s out there.
Image Source: Shutterstock.com
Why it’s problematic
You’ll notice very fast that you didn’t date much. You’ll meet personality types you didn’t encounter before and realize, “Oh…I didn’t even know this was an option…”
Shutterstock
Your goals change
When you’re young, your goals are something like, “Make enough money.” Actually…that’s about it. You just want to become financially stable.
Shutterstock
Why it’s problematic
You’re going to become financially stable and then a bunch of other questions will come up that you and your spouse never asked yourselves before. Are you the type of couple who donates a lot of money? Do you buy a boat? Do you want to retire early? Young couples rarely address these questions early enough to ensure that they’re on the same page.
Image Source: Shutterstock
Your demographic is still very flirty
Let’s face it: people in their 20s are quite flirtatious. They walk into a party and see a buffet of dateable people.
Image Source: Shutterstock.com
Why it’s problematic
Nobody respects your boundaries. People assume you’re single because you’re young, and they flirt with you. A lot. The more temptation, the more risk.
