Rapper and internet comic star Kayla Nicole recently took to TikTok Live to critique modern-day hook-up culture. Her unique perspective elicited mixed reactions from netizens online.
On Feb. 29, Nicole offered her thoughts about the current state of hook-up culture and dating. She argued that while it’s normal to feel “horny” and crave intimacy, women and men should vet and get to know the person they’re dating before they decide to have sex. The video was reposted by the Welcome To The Culture Instagram Page on March 11.
“Nothing about sex is casual,” the “I Hate It Here” rapper explained. “No matter what you believe in. It’s not liberating to just sleep around. That is the opposite of liberation. Liberation is having control and discipline. You know, you can do it, but you don’t. You’re not so easily pulled in.”
To prove her point, Nicole recalled a recent lousy date that she had with an individual who got “mad” because she didn’t want to get freaky during their first encounter. The mother of two said she was baffled by her date’s sour attitude.
“‘Why do you want to take me out of my drawers? You just saw me. Grown people don’t act like that, chill,'” she allegedly told the thirsty man.
“‘I thought you said you like me. The only thing you like is the idea of wanting to get in my drawers. You don’t even really like me and how did you know you like me? We didn’t even get to know each other.'”
Nicole advised both men and women to be cautious before becoming intimate with someone they “just find attractive” and hardly know. The YouTuber and comic emphasized the potentially severe outcomes of engaging in sex with “strangers,” such as getting hurt emotionally or, even worse, “burned,” a thinly veiled term for getting an STD.
Doubling down on her stance, Nicole blamed the state of hook-up culture on viral “Smash and Pass” videos shared on social media. The star, who boasts over 61,000 followers on Instagram, argued that women and men were getting too complacent and rushing the dating process. In many of the videos she watched, Nicole voiced her frustration with hearing people say they would consider having sex on the first night “depending on the vibes.”
She added, “If we just go off the vibe, you could be sleeping with the devil himself going off the vibe. The vibe could be good with anybody. Okay? The vibe could be good with a serial killer… If we keep going off the vibe, you’re going to be laying with people you’re gonna go to hell with…what happened to just being normal?”
In the comments section, users offered their thoughts about Nicole’s hot take on hook-up culture, and many appreciated the fresh perspective.
Several users were happy to see Nicole talk about the consequences of rushing into intimacy. One user loved that the influencer did not “cast judgment” while delivering her thoughts.
“There are real-life consequences to such behavior – physical, emotional, spiritual, and mental. Let’s not pretend or turn a blind eye to that reality because we want to come off as ‘open-minded’ and ‘non-judgmental,’ the user said.
“Life isn’t a game. We live in a world of real-life consequences that affect more than just an individual. That aside, she was 100% spot on when she said true liberation is exercising self-discipline and restraint. Not easily giving into base-level desires frivolously. Mastery of self-discipline in different areas of one’s life creates a life that is almost free of unnecessary stress, strife, and drama.”
Another fan on Instagram commented, “Love this. You wouldn’t give a stranger the pin to your bank card. Why should we give our bodies so easily…our virtue is priceless. If you don’t have self-control, are you really free? You can be a slave to temptation and lust like it’s an addiction. Having the choice is liberating, but being able to make the choice that’s in your best interest is how you take advantage of that liberation.”
Several users slammed Nicole, arguing that women should be given the power and right to have “autonomy over their bodies.”
One user suggested that Nicole’s viewpoint might stem from personal pain, pointing to the influencer’s separation from her husband, Luhkye, in 2023 as a possible influence.
“Life isn’t a 1 size fits all. What empowers one may be disempowering to someone else…live and let live. She only said that because she left her husband (whom she shouldn’t have gotten married to) and tried to date around, it wasn’t what she expected.”
The naysayer added, “It’s liberating for women to do or not do whatever they want with their bodies as long as they aren’t harming others. That’s the freedom. If one wants to be ‘disciplined’ and not have sex, then there’s freedom in that choice as well. Folks need to mind their business and understand that women are whole humans who should have full autonomy over their bodies.”
Another Instagram user chimed in, “Didn’t she divorce her husband, who was there for her before the fame? Then stuck her kids with him while she went on dates and experienced mistreatment cuz she thought the grass was greener on the other side.”
For context, in June 2023, Nicole announced that she and her husband had split. In the since-deleted post, the funny girl clarified that she and Luhkye shared custody of their two children. At the time of the separation, the burgeoning rapper claimed that her kids were staying with her ex-husband so that she could have time to reflect and “heal.”
When a fan asked why they parted ways, Nicole replied, “Growth wasn’t matching and causing many issues. I was just done. Wanted more.”
What are your thoughts on Nicole’s hot take on hook-up culture?
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