Therapist Odilakachi Hezehiah-Onwukwe held men accountable for wanting a submissive woman but not being willing to prove they’re worth submitting to.

Hezehiah-Onwukwe appeared as a guest on The TreeHouse Show on the Dec. 23 episode, where he scolded men for abusing their masculinity to reap the benefits of a woman’s resources—he advocated for women requesting the money upfront.

“‘Women should be submissive.’ Okay, what are you giving them to submit to? What have you built? What have you constructed? Not even a physical house, a proverbial house. What have you done in terms of leadership? What have you done in your community? What have you done for the community? Because, in African patriarchal nations, that is how you obtain respect.”

Hezehiah-Onwukwe explained that men needed something to give to have a submissive wife, clarifying that men weren’t buying a woman but replacing the resources they take.

“If you, as a man, cannot replace this resource, why would I want you in my family? That means you are going to be deadweight. What use do you have outside of just wanting to reproduce? That is going to be another mouth to feed. Can you do what’s necessary to feed this mouth? That’s the reason why women, once again, are asking for money upfront.”

He continued, “Too many men have bought their masculinity on credit.”

The therapist added that men who “posture” their masculinity as an excuse to be entitled to the woman’s resources are underserving of submissive women because they can’t reciprocate what they’re taking.

“Because you haven’t done the work,” he said.

The TreeHouse Show posted the clip of the discussion to their Instagram, where women admitted to wanting to step out of the dating game because modern men have attempted to switch gender roles.

Hezehiah-Onwukwe spoke from African cultures, where economic activities fell on the man or husband to provide for their families. There are numerous studies to support the therapists’ statements. Regardless, commenters tried to counter him by stating that there were various African cultures. But traditional African communities adhere to this culture. 

Further, even if there are various cultures, it doesn’t justify the alpha male’s egotistical perception that women need to prove themselves to become wives. Hezehiah-Onwukwe talked about giving and taking, where the man proves himself to be the provider so the woman can rely on him and submit.

She can’t and shouldn’t have to submit to someone who wants to benefit from her resources without contributing anything.

Watch the full discussion below!


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