Does communicating in a relationship make you happier or do already happy couples just communicate better? Research has found a bit of both, so there’s no doubt there’s a link between opening up to your partner and feeling satisfied in a relationship. We can probably surmise why it isn’t a reliable, one-way transaction. Communicating in a relationship probably only makes couples feel good if they’re with someone who understands them, shows patience, and displays compassion. Otherwise, opening up can make a person feel rejected, judged, and hurt. As for the cases showing that it’s the already happy couples who are more likely to communicate openly, they’re probably already happy because they’ve received hints all along, through sharing about small things, that their partners will be receptive when they share about bigger things.
If you aren’t quite yet comfortable talking to a new-ish partner about some more personal matters, you can start small. You don’t need to tell someone you’ve been dating for three months your deepest, darkest secrets. However, ultimately, if you are looking for a long-term relationship, or are already in one, there are some things you should absolutely be able to talk to a partner about. If you feel you can’t, it’s worth asking yourself where that’s coming from and if this is the right relationship for you. Here are things you should be able to share with your partner.
Your sexual health
If your partner is going to have access to your private parts, then he should be comfortable hearing about their health. This past year I had precancerous cells removed from my cervix, caused by HPV. I had to take an antibiotic, that I injected into my vagina, every night for five days before surgery. I had to have a painful biopsy at the start of it all, which found the precancerous cells. It was really important to me to be able to talk to my partner about all I was going through, from the severe cramping from the biopsy to the scary bleeding that went on for days after, to the nauseating smell of the antibiotic. I would have felt so alone if I couldn’t share that with my live-in partner. And if you have anything going on with your va-jay-jay health, you should be able to talk to your significant other about it, too.