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I’ve become pretty simple in my dating needs as I get older. A quiet, unpretentious restaurant where I can actually hear my date, understand the menu, and not be bothered is pretty much all I ask. And shouldn’t dates be paired down? If you’re trying to get to know somebody, then shouldn’t there not be a ton of distraction? I don’t really know why that’s such a hard concept for some people to grasp. Look, maybe on a third or fourth date you can get a bit more creative. At that point, you’ve learned the basics about the person, had a couple of in-depth conversations, and may be ready to see how he is in a different environment. But for a first date, keep it simple.
In my twenties, guys took me on some weird dates. One guy took me to a car dealership. I think he thought I’d find something sexy about watching him get a new car/negotiate. It turned out he was pretty bad at it, he couldn’t afford the one he wanted, the salesperson was rude, and my date’s credit was very bad—and read out loud in front of me. Not to mention that you can spend hours at a car dealership. Eventually, I just got bored and started making friends with the receptionist. I didn’t even leave with my date. I eventually just said, “I’m gonna go…” Yikes. What a disaster.
There are also some settings that I don’t like anymore, date or no date. So add the element of trying to get to know someone and trying to make a good impression to those arenas, and it’s ten times worse. Gentlemen, if I may: your personality should do the talking, and not some weird, quirky date idea. Here are date spots I hate since turning 30.
Karaoke bars
That scene with Cameron Diaz in “My Best Friend’s Wedding” comes to mind when they all force her to sing karaoke and she sounds like a dying cat and it’s very embarrassing. If you’re at a karaoke bar on a date, you are either politely listening to terrible and loud singing—so you can’t talk—or you are singing, and that’s probably embarrassing. Even when you’re good at singing, it’s embarrassing to be good at a karaoke bar.
