Why I’m Thankful To My Ex Emotional Abuser

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I know this is a very sensitive subject, and not one to be taken lightly—at all. But I did once date an emotionally abusive man and, while I know his intention was not to make me smarter, stronger, and more aware of who I am, that’s exactly what he did. So, for that, I am thankful. I seriously hope he gets some help and doesn’t continue on to treat other women the way that he treated me, but, if I can just speak openly and say what’s true of my experience: surviving an emotionally abusive relationship and leaving it was one of the most impactful things that ever happened to me as a person. I understand that it’s common for people to come out of those relationships feeling hopeless and weak, but, through therapy, I was actually able to learn a lot that went on to be very useful in my life. So, here’s why I’m thankful to my emotional abuser.

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I won’t apologize if I did nothing wrong

My abuser was able to convince me that I’d done something wrong—that I’d intentionally hurt him—when I hadn’t. I don’t let anyone make me believe that anymore. I will apologize when I’ve done something wrong, but I won’t let anyone manipulate facts and try to confuse me, in order to make me feel bad and give up a false apology.