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Ever since I can remember, my younger sister dreamed of her wedding day. Me? Not so much. It’s not because I didn’t believe in marriage, weddings, fairy tales and unicorns, but because it was something that I knew should last forever, and therefore required the utmost thought and care. But some women (and men) romanticize the notion of marriage. Not that bridesmaids, flowers, veils and wedding cakes aren’t dreamy, but many studies have shown that so many couples are SO in love with the idea of being married that they’ve walked down the aisle even though their hearts were filled with dread.

Your inner voice is powerful, yet so many of us fail to listen to it. If you’re considering marriage, but are on the fence, save yourself some time and heartache and really ask yourself if you’re getting married for all the right reasons. If you’re unsure, here are some reasons you SHOULDN’T be getting married just for the hell of it.

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@Cherised He asked me to get him something to drink. When I returned, he was on one knee.

@Janeanedavis We went to dinner, he gave me the ring and asked me if I would do him the honor of becoming his wife.

Eve: LMAO, after living together for a year, he said….”When are we gonna get married”….

You’ve been with your man for a couple of years now, and perhaps the topic of marriage has crept into the conversation a time or two. He’s stated he wants to get married (to you), and you’re both on the same page, but you have no idea when the proposal is coming…if at all. While some men avoid the “M” word like the plague, others are simply waiting for the right time to pop the question. After all, this will probably be the most important question he asks in his life, so he’ll want to make sure he’s ready and that the timing is right. If you think he’s acting weird, or that he might not ever propose at all, let’s try to decipher his behavior by finding clues that he’s finally going to put a ring on it.

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Who says black women don’t get married? When we put out the call for black couples to submit their engagement stories, we were afraid we’d have to search high and low to get sisters to participate…but the happy tales literally poured in! We got so many, we just might make this a regular feature. Here’s our first round of adorable couples and their epic engagement tales. Get the Kleenex!