All Articles Tagged "having children"
Having children can bring up all kinds of emotions, but we were surprised by Isabella Dutton’s essay in the Daily Mail that said her main emotion was no emotion at all. Thirty-three years after giving birth to her first child, she can still recall quite clearly how indifferent she felt at the sight of her five-day-old son, Stuart, in his crib.
What did it, exactly? “Quite simply, I had always hated the idea of motherhood,” Dutton writes. “In that instant, any lingering hope that becoming a mum would cure me of my antipathy was dispelled.” Believing it selfish to have just one child, two years later she had a daughter—and the same feelings toward motherhood. Dutton married her husband at age 19, not wanting children though he said he wanted four. He thought she would eventually change her mind and she did at age 22, but only out of her love for him. Though she didn’t relish the job, she still got in with it. Dutton says she fed and clothed her children, took them to the park; she said no to nannies, feeling she would be the best for her kids. She didn’t want to do a “halfhearted” job, but Dutton still said her children “were like parasites [and]…would continue to take from me and give nothing meaningful back in return.”
The reluctant mother says she missed her old life, though with her day job as a typist at a telecommunications company, it’s not that she was doing anything terribly exciting. What she misses most is her time to herself and her uninterrupted time with her husband. Dutton is careful to point out her attitude toward having children isn’t a result of her own childhood. “Mum and I were close; even as an adult I could always confide in her. My childhood was very happy and conventional. Like most little girls I played with dolls. But I never recall a time when I wanted those make-believe games of motherhood to become a reality.”
Read more on MommyNoire.com.
It’s a taboo subject in our culture: Married women, who dislike, or even hate, having sex with their husbands. It’s a subject usually held in silence, behind embarrassment, confusion and sometimes even apathy. It’s consoled with inner thoughts, such as, “There’s more important things in a marriage than sex,” “This is just a phase,” or “My attraction will increase when the kids are older.”
But at the back of minds, a thought lingers: What if this is forever? What if I’m abnormal? What would outsiders think if they knew the truth about “us”?
Find out what happened to this woman and the fate of her marriage at Your Tango.com.
More on Madame Noire!
- It’s My Nappiversary: 7 Things I Learned Since Going Natural
- 7 Celebrities We’d NEVER Date
- Sisters In Hiding: Not So Famous Sisters of Famous Celebs Part II
- Where Have All The Good Black Men Gone?
- I Do….Again and Again! Celebs Who Keep On Walking Down That Aisle
- A Final Word: What Drove Whitney To Bobby?
- Karrine Steffans, Please Have a Seat and Delete Your Twitter Account While You’re at It
- Uplifting Nuggets of Wisdom From Maya Angelou
Unfortunately, there are still some places that will treat you like a second class citizen simply because you’re black. While many of us recognize this fact, we wouldn’t assume that the place where we bring our children into the world, the hospital, would be so riddled by prejudice and racism.
But believe it. This was the case for writer Denene Millner who gave birth to her first child at a hospital in New York City.
You won’t believe how poorly she was treated on what was supposed to be a happy, memorable occasion. You can read her story at Black Voices.com.
More on Madame Noire!
- Close Call! Actors Who ALMOST Played A Few Surprising Roles…
- Reasons To Love Him, Not His Loot
- Sisters In Hiding: Not So Famous Sisters of Famous Celebs
- Say Cheese! Unfortunate Yet Unforgettable Celebrity Mug Shots
- 8 Signs The Guy You’re Messing With Is NOT a Grown A** Man
- Reader Sound Off! Why the Nicki & Beyoncé Beauty Standard is WAY Off
- Want Kids? See What Mother’s Wish They Knew Before Starting A Family…
- Somebody Come Get This Fool: Bow Wow Reveals Celeb Chicks He Slept With